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[TS] Became a Peach Saint – Chapter 36

As my blurry mind came back to life, the first thing I saw was the rooftop floor right in front of my nose.

“Ugh…”

A groan escaped me as I slowly regained consciousness, recalling what happened yesterday. The moment I came back, I remembered passing out.

Even though the spring warmth was in full swing during the day, the early morning was still as cold as an icebox.

Still, I was lucky my body wasn’t too badly damaged. I got up, wobbling like a zombie.

“Ci…garette…”

I rummaged through my pockets but couldn’t find one. Looking around, I spotted a cigarette pack rolling on the floor.

“Phew…”

I picked it up, pulled out a cigarette, and stuck it in my mouth. Looking up at the sky, the sun was blazing down.

“Damn, I must’ve been lying on the floor all day.”

“Status Window!”

[Ding!]

[Name: Han Ga-eul (Heavenly Peach)]

[Age: 21]

[Position: Saint (聖女)]

[Affiliation: Heavenly Peach (天桃)]

[Affiliation: Heavenly Realm (仙界)]

[Affiliation: Underworld (冥界)]

[Contract Spirit: Aparsek (אפרסק)]

[Contract Deity: Mara Papiyas (魔王波旬)]

[Contract Deity: Siddhartha Gautama (釋迦牟尼)]

“…What the actual hell? I’m not some bat hybrid, why do I have so many affiliations?”

I moved around a bit, but aside from feeling unusually light, nothing else seemed off.

Thinking back to before I passed out, it seemed like a lot had changed, but the unhelpful status window didn’t explain anything properly.

“Ugh, I was in so much pain I couldn’t even read the messages properly.”

I sighed, feeling gross from the chaos I caused yesterday, and headed to the bathroom to shower while thinking about what to do next.

“Shopping, that’s it.”

After spending a while under the warm water, I roughly dried off and went out to the yard, sticking a cigarette in my mouth.

“Status Window!”

[Ding!]

Through the hazy smoke, the still-messed-up skills were displayed.

[[Shop List]]

[Skills] [Items] ─ [Ascending Order] [Search] [Remaining Balance: 108,460,000 won]

[Heavenly Peach (天桃)]

..

..

[Chopstick Skills]

[Slapstick]

..

[Pastry Making]

..

[Animal Husbandry Knowledge]

[Drone Piloting]

..

..

..

[Heavy Hit]

..

[Gun Technique]

..

..

[Iron Ingot]

..

..

[Bone Setting]

“Damn it, give me back my skills.”

All the essential skills I had before were gone, and only one weird skill was left hanging there.

I moved my hand to press it, and text appeared in front of my eyes.

[Heavenly Peach (天桃)]

You are the Heavenly Peach itself.

[Price: 100,000,000 won]

○[Heavenly Peach (仙桃)]

Heavenly Eyes (天眼)

●[Underworld Peach (冥桃)]

Mana Eyes (魔眼)

◐[Divine Body (神體)]

“Damn it… What does it mean that I’m Heavenly Peach? What the hell are Heavenly Eyes and Mana?”

Looking at the skill window filled with descriptions that made no sense, I felt like I was about to get a headache, so I reset the skill window back to its original state.

When I reset the skill window, an even more ridiculous parade of skills unfolded.

“…This is seriously messed up.”

I clicked around to find something useful while also doing some window shopping, but all I found were skills that seemed utterly pointless.

[Chopstick Mastery]: You become good at using chopsticks.

[Price: 500,000 won]

“……”

[Ding!]

“Ugh.”

[Graceful Chopstick Mastery Lv.1]

– Never miss your target when using chopsticks.

– Increased friction at the tip of the chopsticks.

– Faster chopstick handling.

– Improved expressiveness when performing chopstick marches.

[MAX LV]

There were way more absurd skills than I imagined, and I was just staring at them in a daze when my curiosity got the better of me, and my hand moved on its own.

It wasn’t until I heard the system sound that I snapped out of it.

“Damn it, when did I click that? My hard-earned 500,000 won…!”

I clicked around and browsed some more, but nothing seemed immediately useful for someone who just streams from their room.

[Iron Body]

– Temporarily hardens your skin.

– Increases defense based on level.

– Skill level increases with each purchase.

– Activation requires shouting the command phrase (“Tekkai”) at over 100dB.

[Price: 50 million won]

[Stamina]

– Increases strength.

– Boosts cardiovascular endurance.

– Enhances muscular endurance.

– Improves agility.

– Skill level increases with each purchase.

[Price: 1 million won]

The sheer number of skills was overwhelming, but after browsing around, I settled on two that seemed useful right away.

Iron Body looked good for when someone tries to stab you, but the activation method was so stupid that I hesitated to buy it.

On the other hand, the Stamina skill seemed like a no-brainer, so I decided to invest in a few levels and moved my hand.

“Let’s go!”

My fingers moved so fast they left afterimages, dancing through the air.

[Ding!] [Ding!] [Ding!]…

I was enjoying the harmony of my fingers moving and the system sounds ringing in my ears, but less than two seconds later, I broke out in a cold sweat when I realized what had happened.

[Stamina Lv.6]

– Greatly increases strength.

– Greatly boosts cardiovascular endurance.

– Greatly enhances muscular endurance.

– Greatly improves agility.

– Skill level increases with each purchase.

[Price: 64 million won]

[Remaining Balance: 44.96 million won]

Time seemed to freeze as I stared at the remaining balance. My 100 million won fortune had been cut in half.

“Damn… I didn’t even enjoy it for 2 seconds. This is ridiculously expensive.”

I scolded myself for not being able to stop, as if I were on drugs, and wondered if I had gained some abs. I lifted my shirt to check, but my massive chest blocked the view.

To get a proper look, I went into the room and pulled on the bathroom door handle.

*Crackle*

“….?”

In front of me, the wooden bathroom door was torn apart, and in my hand, I could see the door handle that had been ripped off.

“What the hell.”

Thinking my whole body had turned muscular, I went into the bathroom and lifted my clothes, only to find my soft, pale belly unchanged.

“This is some crazy drug trip…”

Just as I was dumbfounded, wondering if this even made sense no matter how much my strength increased, a system sound rang out.

[Ding!]

Like when Par sent a letter before, a letter-shaped image floated in front of me.

To my beloved daughter.

When your body becomes a bit tougher, I will send you a wonderful gift, so keep striving.

From Mara Papiyas, who loves his daughter─

“Is this guy insane? Why am I suddenly his daughter?”

Seeing Mara, who seemed to have lost his mind from running around in hell, send me a letter like this, I was at a loss for words.

Even so, I couldn’t help but wonder what the gift was, which made me think I might not be in my right mind either.

I threw the bathroom handle into the trash and pondered what to do next before picking up my phone.

– Kya! Autumn!

As soon as I called, I could feel the other person’s excitement.

“Eonni, what are you doing?”

– I went to get a report from logistics, had a meeting, and now I’m on my way back.

“Ah, were you driving?”

– It’s fine, I’m on Bluetooth! Did you call because you missed me?

“Yeah, I was bored and thought about hanging out with you. It’s the weekend, but you seem busy. Let’s hang out next time.”

– Huh? No! Let’s hang out!! What should we do?

“Hmm… I don’t feel like going out. Want to come over to my place? I went shopping today, so let’s grill some meat.”

– Eek, that sounds great! I’ll come!!

“Alright, I’ll send you the address, so check it later when you stop the car.”

– Okay!! See you soon, Autumn!

“Hey, don’t mess around and drive carefully.”

– Got it!!

After ending the call with my always energetic sister, I went out to the yard and lit a cigarette.

“─Hoo.”

Remembering that I had leveled up a skill before the call, I clenched the cigarette in my mouth and threw a punch into the air with all my might.

─Bang!!

The sound of the air exploding echoed across the rooftop as I struck nothing but empty space.

“This is insane…”

Hearing the sound of air bursting, something I only thought existed in cheap martial arts movies, made me wonder if this was even possible.

“If I can’t control my strength, I might send someone to their grave.”

After shadowboxing alone for a while, I got interested in fighting, but remembering that my sister was coming, I opened the status window.

[Ding!]

[Cooking]

Increased ability in all aspects of cooking.

[Price: 1 million won]

“Phew… Fingers, please don’t act up on me.”

[Ding!]

[Ding!]

[Ding!]

[Cooking Lv.3]

– Ingredient Prep

– Seasoning Adjustment

– Fire Handling

– Kitchen Knife Handling

– Dry Heat Cooking

– Moist Heat Cooking

Skill level increases with each purchase.

[Price: 8 million won]

[Remaining Balance: 37.96 million won]

“Ugh… I only meant to tap twice, but these darn fingers won’t listen.”

I was making a ruckus on the rooftop alone when I heard knocking from the iron door installed on the rooftop.

“Eonni?”

“Yes!! It’s me.”

“I already told you the passcode.”

“Hehe. But it’s my first time here, how could you say that?”

I walked over to the iron door and slightly opened it, peeking out to see Eonni’s face.

“Pfft. Eonni, what are you doing? Come in.”

At my invitation, she peeked her face in first, looked around, and then carefully stepped inside.

“Ooh… Excuse me!”

“Yeah, excuse yourself a lot.”

“So this is Ga-eul’s place. It’s my first time in a rooftop room, it’s so cool.”

“I haven’t been living here long either.”

Eonni, seemingly excited, wandered around the rooftop and then came back to me.

“This is fun! It’s way bigger than I thought.”

“It’s just a boring rooftop, what’s so fun about it?”

Watching her happily explore the otherwise plain rooftop and chatter about it made me feel happy too.

Seeing Eonni moving her mouth so enthusiastically made her look cute, so I gently patted her head.

“Eek!”

“Pfft, Eonni, you’re so cute.”

“I… I’m the older one here.”

“Oh, is that so? Should I hug you, Eonni?”

When I spread my arms, her face turned bright red, and without saying no, she hesitantly stepped closer.

I pulled her in for a tight hug, feeling her warm and soft presence fully in my arms.

“You’ve worked hard to come all the way here.”

“Hmm…”

Just hugging her made her melt, and I slowly stroked her back.

[TS] Became a Peach Saint

[TS] Became a Peach Saint

[TS] 복숭아 성녀가 되었다
Score 6.2
Status: Ongoing Type: Released: 2023 Native Language: Korean
One day, while I was living a meaningless life, the meaningless d*ck disappeared and a meaningful status window appeared.

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