Episode 522 – Nth Time.
The blade moves forward again.
It shifted just a tiny bit, but it was steadily aimed at that dog.
But the cost paid for that small movement was too great.
Because I had now lost piece forever.
Wasn’t it said that you can only realize the value of something precious after you lose it?
In the moment I deeply felt her absence, I finally understood.
She was truly someone invaluable to me.
Of course, until now, she had bewildered me with her long-winded nonsense.
And we often exchanged curses at each other every moment.
But looking back now, they were treasured memories.
– “That scum finally got lost.”
“He’s not scum. It’s piece.”
But that dog dared to utter such things about piece.
Who do you think you are?
Dismissing piece as mere scum.
– “I don’t care about that bug’s title.”
“Shut your mouth.”
Thanks to that, intent to kill thickly painted over my wavering will.
Piece would prove that she was not just a piece of trash.
No matter when the moment came, I wouldn’t give up.
The word despair would never come out of my mouth again.
And.
“I’ll personally kill you for sure.”
– “Those are my words to say, you dog.”
I will tear this dog apart with my own hands.
That would be the bare minimum to commemorate piece, who believed in me until the end.
A tombstone only I would remember, as no one else would.
“I’ll see you later.”
– “You’ll never see me again in your lifetime.”
And with my fierce laugh, the world changes once more.
I was still scared, but I wouldn’t fall again.
Never would I allow myself to lose something precious again.
After that, the same actions repeated.
Through this dog’s regression, I experienced potential timelines.
Holding tight to my wavering self, I just kept moving forward.
It was a very short time, but it felt like an eternity.
I died in vain by a professor’s hand in the Academy.
I could have survived if I received treatment immediately.
But because the professor tried to cover it up for fear of tarnishing his career.
– “If you give that up, I will give you a world where you can take revenge.”
I moved forward.
There was even a moment when I was decapitated due to Hyeji’s mistake.
As Hyeji cried buckets, not knowing what to do.
Before I could finish saying it wasn’t your fault.
– “That was a wrong choice.”
I moved forward again.
I died doing nothing against the Elf who harmed Hyeji.
And I had to face all kinds of humiliation, pitifully, as everyone looked on.
Leaving behind a word of apology as Hyeji ran toward me.
– “Do you want a more thorough trampling of the future?”
Yet I moved forward.
I got critically wounded by a Monster, turning into a meal.
I was so unlucky that I didn’t die, barely hanging on.
While being torn apart alive, experiencing every agonizing moment.
– “If you don’t want to suffer more than this, hand it over!”
Once again, I moved forward.
While trying to escape with Elcia, I got captured and tortured by the Elves.
For what could be described as a long time even by the Elves‘ standards.
With numerous life-support and torture devices hanging off my body.
– “It can get even harder than this, just relax!”
I kept moving forward.
A crazed Mage cast a curse targeting Ayeon, I took it instead, and my body started to necrotize.
It was powerful enough that I was internally begging anyone to kill me quickly.
Still, with my decaying hands, I wiped away Ayeon’s tears, smiling as I wrapped up my life.
– “Now it’s a pain beyond compare!”
Once again, I moved forward.
In the Beastman Kingdom, a Cardinal captured me and self-destructed, dropping me in a desolate land without limbs.
Crawling like a bug, I tried to survive by eating anything, only to die of sickness.
No matter what I put in my mouth, I vomited even more, in a miserable state as rats gnawed at my missing arms and legs.
– “What the hell are you still holding on for!”
Grinding my teeth, I moved forward.
Things went wrong in the middle, and I ended up being captured by Hunters hired by the Chief.
Becoming food for Monsters and chewed to death at his hands.
Until the moment I felt my breath stop, pain filled me from my toes, ever so slowly.
– “All you had to say was you were giving up!”
I slammed the ground a bit hard and moved forward.
Now, without even entering the Academy, I lost my entire family in an accident during childhood.
Living my life begging, trembling from cold and hunger.
I was left alone and pitiful, stabbed with a dagger by a Hunter targeting a homeless person.
– “Why are you so stubborn about this!”
I bit my lips hard and moved forward.
Misunderstanding piled on misunderstanding, conflicts tangled up so complexly.
Eventually leading to a situation where they themselves took my life.
Before my breath ceased, the sight of them in tears knowing the truth came to mind.
Still, this time I moved forward fiercely, laughing.
– “I even killed you! Aren’t you in pain!”
“I thrive on regret, despair, and obsession, you dog.”
Countless possibilities were hard to measure numerically.
While they might seem alike at first glance.
Upon closer inspection, they were never truly the same.
Honestly, I had lost count of how many regressions I had experienced by now.
Plus, I’d endured too much time and suffering for one person to bear.
My head was spinning, and if I didn’t focus, I felt I’d faint at any moment.
I worried that my mind might completely wear out like this.
– “At this point, maybe it’s time to give up!”
“……Your mom didn’t give up on you……so why should I?”
Yet throughout that endless time, my will had not wavered even slightly.
I kept sharpening my will’s blade with intent to kill.
I only aimed that blade at that dog.
Slowly enough to yawn, but without faltering, I pushed forward with certainty.
Then, as if believing despair couldn’t sway my will.
Perhaps completely tired of me never giving up.
Or maybe thinking mere suffering was insufficient.
The content of the potentialities from my regressions began to change slightly.
Starting to date someone from childhood.
Leading to marriage and peacefully growing old together.
Yet, I was never satisfied until the very last moment.
I felt sorry for my partner, but none of this was anyone I recognized.
This time, I finished my life experiencing a truly sweet pure love with Hyeji.
Having many children, and creating a harmonious family that anyone could see.
But in that happiness, I couldn’t say I was at all satisfied.
Because within that happiness, the happiness of the other girls was absent.
Now, I reached a point where I built a happy family based on abundant living without shortage.
Even more than the girls I knew, with countless beauties.
Yet I remained utterly unsatisfied and made the choice to let it all go.
For there was no piece, as precious to me as anyone else.
– “With so many females, why can’t you be satisfied with just that piece of trash!!!”
“She’s not trash. She’s the only precious piece in the world.”
I just kept moving forward through one regression after another.
Neither giving up.
Nor despairing.
Nor being satisfied.
How many times had I repeated my regression now?
“Is that all you got, you piece of shit?”
– “W-wait!”
Before I knew it, my blade had reached just below that dog’s outstretched arm.
Had this dog become unable to send me back anymore?
Or did he think further regression would be pointless?
Or perhaps, had the near-infinite regression finally come to an end?
Honestly, I didn’t care which it was.
“After all that time, what were you waiting for?”
– “Speak your desired future!”
Now it was just a matter of killing this dog.
“My desired future?”
– “Yes!!! I’ll give you a future that satisfies you!!! So just obediently let it go-”
“You can’t give me my future.”
I slice off the voice pleading for a compromise in one breath.
Isn’t it too ridiculous?
Our future, or rather, my future.
Isn’t something assigned by someone else.
It’s something we create completely by ourselves.
– “Then what the hell do you want for the future!!!”
“Well, at least you’re not in it.”
The blade gathers strength in the firm grip of my hand.
So that no matter what happens, I won’t let go.
To swing it without delay.
To ensure I can kill this dog.
Exhaling, I finally moved my body.
“Despair and obsession were my experiences up till now.”
– “S-stop!!!”
“Regret is yours to bear, you piece of shit.”
In that moment, I experienced another regression.
And as soon as that regression ended, I swung upward to sever the arm.
I lashed out intent to kill even more intensely thanks to the recent regression.
“Hey!!! I get that I’m going through TS!!!”
Then, just a step closer than before.
I stabbed the blade deep into this dog’s heart.
“When the Forest of Elves becomes a barren wasteland and I’m ready for my harem, at that moment!!!
The blade sliced through flesh and broke bones as it went straight.
And as that blade fully passed through the flesh, I twisted it.
“Why the hell is there suddenly a fcking dick involved!!!”
I inserted the sword as a key.
And opened the door of trials.
“Harem isn’t an act of preparing to stab a dick, you dog!!!”
To forge a new path ahead.
