〈 Chapter 262 〉 Chapter 256 – Dog Sh*t (1)
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Suddenly, the Holy Knights charged forward.
But their target wasn’t us.
It was Choi Hansol.
I quickly asked Choi Hansol, “Hey, what the hell did you do to get chased off?”
“…Anyway, I was unfairly chased away.”
“What’s that, you little sh*t?”
“…You don’t need to know.”
Choi Hansol suddenly released my collar and turned away, and from his tone, it seemed like he wouldn’t tell me anything.
But surprisingly, someone else clarified my doubt.
“How dare you modify our Cardinal into a female pro!!!!!”
“…What?”
An unbelievable truth spilled from the lips of the leading Holy Knight.
Choi Hansol, enraged by those words, shouted at the leading Holy Knight.
“I modified him into the best body in the world, so why the hell are you complaining!”
“Shut up!!! During the restoration surgery, our Cardinal almost truly became a woman!!!”
Not to mention, he seemed oblivious to the severity of the situation.
Choi Hansol leisurely raised his hands to stop the advancing leader Holy Knight.
“Honestly, you should be thanking me since you were a sh*tty male to begin with!”
“Do you still not realize your sins?!”
“Yeah, it’s a three-centimeter Cardinal c*ck~.”
“How dare you insult the Cardinal! I’ll kill you!!!
Then Hyeji whispered ominously to Choi Hansol, just loud enough for him to hear.
With a clean body blow—BAM!!!
“Hey, you b*tch, I can’t modify!”
“…W-Well, it requires a minimum requirement.”
“But how can you attach a missile then!”
The leading Holy Knight was now closing in.
Seeing this, Choi Hansol shouted to me with a determined expression.
“Don’t worry about me and run away!”
However, I couldn’t leave Choi Hansol behind.
Because…
“Get going already!!!”
“Let go, you little sh*t!”
Choi Hansol was fiercely holding onto me.
I was puzzled that such a frail body had this much strength.
‘This bastard only acts up at times like this.’
[I have to do something!]
Reluctantly, I decided to use the Holy Knights this time.
“Holy Knight! This guy just attacked that Holy Knight!!!”
“I-I never did!”
“How dare you attack a Holy Knight! You shall pay for your sins for a lifetime!”
With this, the equipment of the leading Holy Knight became even more threatening.
Only then did Choi Hansol realize the gravity of the situation.
He reluctantly released his hold on me and tried to flee, but this time I quickly grabbed his arm tightly and spoke up.
“Which is why I’m holding you like this!”
“Let go, you crazy bastard!!!!”
“Well done!!! I’ll reward you later!!!!!!”
Soon after, a pair of murky-colored anal beads wrapped around Choi Hansol’s neck.
With overwhelming force, he broke free from me and got dragged away by the leading Holy Knight.
“I’ll personally bring justice upon you!!!”
“Wait, this guy is actually—!”
But I couldn’t feel relieved just yet.
In the moment he was caught, Choi Hansol was about to expose that I was human.
So, I hurriedly spouted words to drive the leading Holy Knight mad.
“Holy Knight! That guy still has his youth intact!”
“What, what did you say!!!!! Is that really true!!!!!!”
“Of course!”
Upon hearing my words, the leading Holy Knight lost his sanity and dragged Choi Hansol away exclaiming.
“First Blood is mine!!!”
“W-Wait! I didn’t mean it! Please spare me just this once!”
He began tearing Choi Hansol’s clothes apart.
Before long, two sounds reached my ears.
The resounding shout of the Holy Knight. And Choi Hansol’s scream.
“I’ll treat you like the dog beastman you are!!!”
“I’m just a dog that’s up there!!!”
“Well then, I’ll send you to heaven, which is up there!”
Hearing this, a piece quietly spoke to me.
[Isn’t that a bit too severe, after all?]
‘NTR-loving bastard needs to experience it himself to wake up.’
Although it didn’t seem like I was being too generous with the NTR lover, it somehow felt like some form of justice had been served.
Just in time, the Holy Knights approached us.
This was not good.
Very much so.
As soon as Hyeji noticed their approach, she quickly spoke to me in a whisper just loud enough for me to hear.
“Do you want me to kill them?”
“Wait. They’re too close.”
Even if I activated ‘Hyeji’, there was still a risk with these guys so near.
“If I’m not careful, I might get hit by anal beads.”
“Ah, f*ck. That can’t happen.”
[Just take a hit and fight already.]
‘You can take the hit, you b*tch.’
Getting hit by anal beads absolutely cannot happen.
If that does, I would be devastated.
All the precious things inside me would disappear.
“What are you planning? If we keep going like this, we’ll have to fight in the end?”
“Husband! I used too many abilities earlier, so I’m struggling now!”
“I’d rather die than see you get hit by anal beads.”
“I’ll try to pass by without a clash. Just trust me.”
Finally, the group of Holy Knights arrived a few steps away from us.
Among them, one of the knights who seemed to be the deputy commander stepped forward.
To avoid suspicion, I quickly lowered my head and spoke up.
“Holy Knights, please forgive my rudeness for standing while capturing a criminal.”
“Very well. I will forgive you this time only.”
“Thank you for your kindness.”
At that moment, the deputy commander of the Holy Knights sniffed and tilted his head, showing signs of doubt.
“Wait a moment. Are you really a wolf beastman? I smell a human.”
The heroines wore fur suits, so they went undetected, but I seemed to have slightly raised suspicion just by having a headband and tail.
“Ah, since I lived on Earth for a long time, the human disease is accurate.”
“What a pitiful soul you are! For the sake of hygiene, make sure to wear a mask next time.”
“I will keep that in mind.”
“Then everyone prepare to go back!”
It was surprisingly going well.
The Holy Knights were passing by without suspicion.
I thought that was one problem solved, but then an unexpected sound began to surface.
“T-This bastard is human!!! My spear has been tainted!!!”
“Ah, f*ck.”
The leading Holy Knight’s cry rang out.
Given a momentary reprieve, Choi Hansol struggled on the ground, slightly breaking free from the leading Holy Knight and began pointing at me with bloodshot eyes.
“That guy is a human too!!!!”
“You f*cking bastard…”
At the same time, he twisted his face into a warped smile, as if he couldn’t die alone.
Meanwhile, the leader of the Holy Knight.
In other words, the head of the Holy Knights was pulling at his hair in agony.
Then he suddenly looked up at the sky and emitted a voice mixed with tears.
“Holy Spirit!!! I can’t die like this!!! Grant me power!!!”
The moment his words ended, a brown divine power enveloped the whole body of the Holy Knight commander.
In that state, the commander, with lost focus in his eyes, pressed down on Choi Hansol’s head and began the operation.
“Receive the Holy Knight’s Sacred Spear!!!!”
“GAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!”
[…Is the Lord responding to this guy?]
‘Eh? Turns out this bastard is a gay.’
Just then, a branch came flying from somewhere and struck me sharply across the cheek.
It felt like the message from the Lord was being conveyed through my stinging cheek.
Not it but rather, do you want to die?
“Speak up, you sh*t…”
It’s fortunate that proper justice was finally served on Choi Hansol.
But right in front of my eyes, the Holy Knights began to send me cold stares.
This was dangerous.
‘I should have just ripped that bastard’s tongue out, damn it.’
[That’s not the problem here!]
The deputy commander of the Holy Knights glared at me with wide eyes and growled.
“Are you really a wolf beastman?”
“I swear to the Lord, I am.”
“If so, how do you plan to prove it?”
With that, the rotating anal beads threatened me as if to hit me in an instant.
Just looking at the anal beads spinning like that sent chills down my spine.
But still, as the protagonist, I should be able to easily get through this little crisis.
I calmed my inner turmoil and opened my mouth as calmly as I could.
“As you know, wolves belong to the dog family.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“In other words, I’ll prove I’m a wolf beastman with some dog sh*t!”
“…Speak then.”
I was given the opportunity.
First, I’d start light.
“The current J Platform is a perfect male-oriented platform!”
I thought it was a clean and perfectly dog sh*t statement.
But it seemed the deputy commander thought differently.
“What nonsense is that? We have a perfect platform!”
“Ah.”
Only then did I realize these bastards were anus lovers.
In other words, it meant that much of my common sense would not apply here.
The deputy commander began to frown his face even more and glare at me sharply.
“Are you perhaps a spy from Nopia?”
“Ah, no. I got confused with Earth’s common sense.”
“Then you truly are not the human disease but an actual human!”
“I’m sorry. I’ll try again.”
I had to dispel their doubts.
So, this time, I decided to go a little harder.
“If I get elected this time, I’ll provide a house to every commoner.”
I could confidently say that this dog sh*t statement was perfect.
But yet again, my expectations shattered into pieces.
“I’m sorry, but that’s not dog sh*t.”
“…Huh?”
The deputy commander began explaining to my half-dazed self.
“This is the Beastman Kingdom. There are plenty of wealthy furries, so it’s possible.”
“T-This can’t be happening…”
“This is the common sense of the Beastman Kingdom. It’s written in the ‘Economic Cheats for Beastman’ section of the textbook.”
Simultaneously, the deputy commander began to rotate the anal beads even faster than before.
“How can you not even know the curriculum! You’re truly a human!”
“I’m sorry. The truth is I’ve been studying abroad on Earth since childhood. Please grant me one last chance.”
“I’ll grant you a special chance. This is your last one.”
In any case, this was my last chance.
[Proving you’re a dog sh*t would be a joke. It’s an obvious fact.]
‘Exactly, proving that 1+1=2 is the hardest, you b*tch.’
Finally, my mouth opened, and
The dog sh*t symphony began.
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