A month had passed since Murong Sang-a heard news of Kang Yoon-ho.
Murong Sang-a was swinging her sword in her personal training ground.
“Miss. It’s already been a month. It’s time you have your meal,” Great Lord of Spear Peak remarked as he watched her training, waiting for the intensity to die down before speaking.
“I have no thoughts on that.”
With that one phrase, Murong Sang-a recklessly scattered the herbs before her as if facing life-or-death foes.
“You haven’t eaten properly for a month and only trained in martial arts. You’ll harm yourself,” he warned.
Since that day, Murong Sang-a had hardly touched food, throwing herself into her martial arts training.
“I said I have no thoughts on it.”
How could she even think about food when the high official died suffering because of her?
It was better to focus on training to strike down one more demonic cultist when the time came. And so, she continued to swing her sword.
The Great Lord of Spear Peak looked at his master with a pained expression.
Ever since she had heard news about Kang Yoon-ho, Murong Sang-a had been rampaging like a horse being whipped to run without rest.
The servants worriedly informed him that Murong Sang-a hadn’t been sleeping well either.
No matter how strong a horse was, if it galloped toward its destination without food or rest, it would eventually collapse.
She didn’t appear to care, but it was obvious to anyone that she’d lost a lot of weight. However, no matter what the Great Lord said, she showed no signs of wanting to take a break.
Stopping such a master seemed like a daunting task.
Reluctantly, the Great Lord decided to take special measures.
“Tomorrow marks the one-year anniversary of your marriage. Surely, the late Master Kang Yoon-ho wouldn’t want to see you like this.”
“What does Great Lord know about the Master…?!”
Murong Sang-a snapped at the Great Lord’s words, halting her training.
“On that day, Master Kang Yoon-ho had taken sleeping medication beforehand. If he didn’t know he was going to die soon, it was behavior without reason. In other words, the two of you had talked about something since you left the Murong Family, hadn’t you?”
“…….”
Murong Sang-a lowered her gaze at the Great Lord’s interrogation.
“On that night, I can’t know what was said between the two of you. However, if my guess is correct, Master Kang Yoon-ho would absolutely not want to see you like this.”
At first, she thought her scheme had been a brilliant success, with Kang Yoon-ho’s death leading to a tremendous turnaround for her master, Murong Sang-a.
But what if it wasn’t a scheme but rather the sacrifice of a man?
Kang Yoon-ho’s guards weren’t fleeing in a hurry but waiting for the Great Lord of Spear Peak to come after them.
If a man, certain he’d lost everything, gave his last breath for a woman… if a fervent love between a man and woman created this situation…
Then the reason for her master’s transformation became clear.
“To carry on his will, there’s no time to waste.”
“Is Master Kang Yoon-ho’s will for you to collapse from exhaustion? The man who sacrificed himself for his beloved wouldn’t say something like that.”
The Great Lord spoke to her with assuredness.
“……”
Murong Sang-a recalled the words of her beloved from that night.
“一 Survive.
一 Live on and reclaim the Murong Family. And when all is done, place a flower on my grave.”
Was she really living on now?
Murong Sang-a quietly looked at her body. Surely, it was noticeably more emaciated than a month ago. It looked less like she was living and more like she was existing to die.
Could she truly uphold Master’s will and lay flowers at his grave with such a body?
“…… How is the search for the Master’s grave going?”
“We’re trying to track down everyone involved in recovering the body. I’m sure we’ll hear good news soon.”
She needed to find that grave. With her current body and situation, she would collapse before even reaching it.
“……. Tonight, I will have a meal.”
“Really? Then I’ll send someone to prepare a delicious feast for you!”
“I’ve heard that if I eat something oily all of a sudden, it could upset my stomach. I’ll have porridge today.”
“Are you promising that?”
“Yes. I promise.”
Because she couldn’t collapse just yet.
“Since you promised, I’ll take my leave now.”
The Great Lord sensed her firm resolve in her eyes and left her training ground.
——————
The next day, near midnight.
Murong Sang-a ordered her servants to prepare a myriad of exquisite dishes.
Since she usually ate little, the servants were puzzled by her order to prepare so much food, but they happily prepared it late at night upon hearing that she would be eating again.
“No need for serving. Everyone, leave.”
She dismissed all the servants, following her own command.
Time flew by, and midnight passed.
Once the presence of people disappeared, Murong Sang-a began opening all the windows in the room. Although it was technically spring, the outside air was still chilly.
She took out a hidden item and placed it on the table amidst the feast.
What she placed bore an inscription.
Hyun Byeok Student’s Spirit Tablet.
Kang Yoon-ho.
What she retrieved was the spirit tablet offered by a wife preparing a ritual for her dead husband.
Today, after midnight, it was the day of their unforgettable night.
And it was the first anniversary of Kang Yoon-ho’s death.
She placed incense beside the spirit tablet and lit it, causing a gentle fragrance to fill the room in honor of the deceased.
After pouring a drink into a cup for her husband, she bowed before the tablet and spoke.
“I’ve prepared food for you. The dishes you can hardly find in the Central Plains, all famous foods from Joseon.”
Laid out on the sacrificial table were dishes that some might go a lifetime without tasting.
There was no sacrificial table that could offer a better array of food than this. Anyone would agree it was an exceptional feast.
Yet, as she looked at the food, she could only muster a sorrowful smile.
“Despite missing you so much, I don’t know a single dish you like.”
Among all this food, would there be anything the Master enjoyed during his life? Would the Master see this sacrificial table and feel disappointed that there was nothing he liked?
Would he like these dishes? Murong Sang-a doubted herself.
If only there was someone who knew what the Master liked, she would have asked. But no one remained who knew his favorites in this world.
All due to her own mistakes.
“I’m scared. Master.”
In front of her husband’s spirit tablet, Murong Sang-a began to confess her inner turmoil for the first time in a year.
“The brother still tightly holds power. The Demonic Cult is expanding its influence from the Murong Family. The elders of the council, oblivious to the rot within the family, only show greed.”
In a situation where despair was the only option, her only hope lay in the remnants left by her husband.
However, the more she used what he had left, the more the accusations against her grew.
“I’m not afraid of receiving accusations. If I can drive out the Demonic Cult, then I can stomp over those fingers pointing at me. I’m not afraid of expelling the Demonic Cult either. As long as this body is alive, I will carry on my goals. Such things don’t frighten me. What truly frightens me… the one thing that terrifies me…”
Murong Sang-a couldn’t bear to look at the spirit tablet and lowered her head.
“I’m scared I won’t be able to meet you again in the afterlife.”
The unjustly slain hero.
The evil woman who killed him.
The evil woman’s sins were deep, and further still, they would deepen.
Would the paths of the hero and the evil woman truly converge?
“I’d gladly face being torn apart in hell. I’d be fine being set on fire all over.”
Her sins were so profound that she would likely be destined for the most painful places in hell.
If it was a place she had to go due to her sins, she would go.
No matter what punishment awaited her, she wouldn’t mind.
But just one thing.
“If I could have one wish fulfilled…”
“I want to see your face just once more.”
She would accept any punishment without complaint.
If she had to endure eternal hellfire, she would do so willingly.
So please.
“Even if you look at me with a cold face, even if you vent your anger, even if you curse me, I don’t care. Just once, just once, I want to see your face.”
Tears began to flow down Murong Sang-a’s face as she bowed her head and wept.
The ache of longing squeezed at her heart.
“I want to see your face. I want to hear your voice. I want to… ask for your forgiveness… forgiveness.”
This didn’t mean she wanted to stand in front of him and seek forgiveness.
Her sins weren’t forgivable.
How could an evil woman, who couldn’t confess her sins even in the last moment, hope for forgiveness?
If only she could confess her sins in the most burning part of hell, she wished that the one passing judgment would be her Master.
“If I could see your face just once more, no matter what punishment you bestow upon me, I would receive it with a smile.”
Just as his last was her, may her last be him.
After bowing once more to her husband’s spirit tablet, Murong Sang-a stood up.
Would he come here? Would he like the food she prepared? Would he not come after hearing all the truths from the afterlife?
Even while preparing the Master’s spirit tablet, laying out the food, and bowing, Murong Sang-a felt fear.
Zzzzzhhhhhh…
From somewhere, a warm spring breeze entered the room.
A warm breeze not fitting for the chilly weather.
That breeze began to swirl gently around the room, then flickered the flames of the incense, turning them red.
As if signaling that someone had arrived.
“Is it… Master?”
She whispered with a trembling voice.
The deceased visits to partake in the food prepared by the living for their memorial.
The breeze flickered the incense flames a bit more, then enveloped Murong Sang-a warmly.
If the Master has arrived, she mustn’t show weakness. She needed to show him that she was living, not dying.
With a tear-stained face, Murong Sang-a forced a smile.
The warm breeze gently caressed her tear-streaked face before quietly dissipating.
“Master…”
Could it really have been him? She hoped it was.
If he had come knowing all her sins, if he had come to comfort this cowardly woman…
It would mean that he was waiting for her in the afterlife.
Murong Sang-a carefully drank the wine poured for her husband.
Gulp gulp. The strong liquor entering her empty stomach flowed through her veins.
A ritual is ultimately an act of honoring the deceased while the living gain the strength to move forward.
The warm breeze that had brushed away her tears. The energy flowing through her body, left by him.
She had found the courage to keep moving forward.
——————
One day, Murong Sang-a began to move forward again.
“Miss! We received a message from the dispatched Spear Peak Band. The Azure Dragon Terrace Guard’s 5th division has mostly been wiped out! Those who survived, the ones exposed, killed themselves on the spot!”
The Great Lord of Spear Peak reported with a joyful expression.
“That’s wonderful.”
“They want to know how to deal with the remaining ones.”
“Either win them over or torture them to divulge what they know and then kill them all.”
“They’ve already rejected persuasion, and most have refused to speak. I will tell them to try again and handle it.”
Having finished his report, the Great Lord of Spear Peak walked out of Murong Sang-a’s office.
Murong Sang-a gazed at her left hand after the Great Lord vanished.
There, a ring signifying she could forever think of her faraway husband was on her ring finger.
“It’s just the beginning now.”
She had laid the foundation and finally reduced her brother’s power a bit.
Where this would lead her, she didn’t know, but now that she had started, she would not stop.
“Master, please watch over me until the end.”
The wicked woman lovingly caressed the ring on her ring finger, solidifying her resolve.
