“Jonah. Take your hand out of your pocket.”
“Ahhhhh!!!”
Lydia?! Lydia, why are you here?!
I never imagined Lydia would show up at this moment, let alone realize my crime.
I was so shocked that I almost screamed and tried to run in all directions.
“Yap.”
Of course, I was caught immediately. She shoved her hand under my armpit and lifted me up. No matter how much I flailed, I couldn’t escape.
Oh my. How is this happening? If it were Ellie, I would understand, but Lydia isn’t that tall and shouldn’t have this much strength…
“Ah.”
Now that I look closely, Lydia was holding me up almost like a victory pose. She looked like a otter showing off its baby.
It wasn’t exactly the cutest thing; it was more like an arrest in progress.
As Lydia drew attention with her already noticeable appearance, people began to stare.
“Is that the honorable Lydia? And that boy…?”
“That’s Pinkie. Given it’s Lydia, that scruffy kid must be a snake in the grass.”
“That’s kind of Pinkie-hating, you know… But if that’s the case, did he actually manage to seduce her?”
“Yeah, right. What do you think? It’s not like she just got called ‘pure Lydia’ for no reason.”
“True. I have no idea where all that money goes.”
“Looks like it’s not going to places like a brothel, unlike you.”
“Stop pretending to be clean! I know you bought that slave with the money you saved for weapons!”
“Being in love with a slave is an essential part of life.”
“If you want to be in love, why not liberate them instead of using them, you idiot?”
“You have no clue. It’s arousing when a slave pretends to love me to look good.”
“? Are you insane?”
As I shivered at the terrifying conversations happening in the crowd, Lydia demanded again.
“Pocket. Give it to me.”
“Uh, um, well, you see, Lydia…”
I subtly glanced in the direction the elven thief had gone. Thankfully, perhaps due to the distance, they seemed to have lost interest and resumed their own business.
I sighed with relief, thinking I had avoided the worst, and pulled out my wallet.
“My resentment of ten times…”
“…Resentment?”
Maybe it was the dripping bitterness in my voice. Lydia tilted her head and lowered me. She took one wallet in each hand and asked.
“Jonah, what do you mean?”
“I mean exactly that. I happened to come across a girl who took all the little money I had when I was begging for food and decided to take some revenge.”
“How much?”
“8 copper.”
“That’s not a lot…”
“Right? It may seem like nothing now, but at that time, it was a really big deal.”
“Really?”
“It wasn’t just the amount. It was when I hadn’t eaten anything for five days!”
“5… days?”
“Yeah. By then, I really felt like I was going to die. So I tried to resist somehow, but I couldn’t stand against an adult woman.”
“…What?”
Her voice was bewildered. Lydia opened her mouth cautiously as if worried.
“Are you okay?”
“Of course not! 8 copper was all I had! I really thought I was going to starve to death! …Well, luckily, there was food distribution at the temple the very next day, so I survived, but back then, I thought the sky was falling!”
“I’m not talking about that. You had a terrifying experience. Usually, trauma… ah.”
Lydia, who seemed like she wanted to say something but then realized it, nodded as if she understood. A deeper pity followed after his realization.
What? Did I say something strange?
While I tilted my head in confusion, Lydia’s expression turned cold as she fixated on the direction the elven thieves had disappeared to, just like when she faced the dual dagger clan leader.
After a while, she let out a deep sigh and relaxed her eyes.
“Ugh.”
Then, with an awkward gesture, she began to pat my head.
“Good job.”
“Huh? For what?”
“You must have wanted to kill them, but you held back.”
“No matter how much I resent 8 copper, I wouldn’t kill someone just for being robbed!”
What does Lydia even think of me? I was bewildered but just stayed still while receiving her pats.
Now I realized Lydia was in casual clothes. Of course, that made sense since it was her day off.
Overall, it was a warm outfit fitting for winter. Yet, there was one undeniable presence that couldn’t be concealed, even with such thick clothes.
Swish swish.
“Oh….”
Her chest, which I could never see when she was always in armor, was a sight to behold.
I couldn’t accurately gauge the size unless she removed her coat, but I cautiously guessed it wouldn’t be smaller than a melon’s.
As I admired for a while, Lydia seemed to notice my gaze. She paused her hand for a moment and blinked those crimson eyes.
“Jonah. You have a weird expression.”
“Ah, it’s nothing. Please continue.”
“…Okay.”
Without showing any sign of being bothered, Lydia continued to stroke my head. Maybe it makes sense. In the Pan Continent, a woman’s chest isn’t something to be overly embarrassed about.
Perhaps due to lingering cultural remnants from before the Divine War, anyone who went about fully exposed was considered a crazy exhibitionist… but that was about it.
As long as you cover the area of underwear, it seems acceptable. Thus, there is a relative allowance for the exposure of chests and the attention they attract.
Right now, it was cold, so everyone was bundled up… but in summer, it was no joke.
Cheers to my past self for creating such settings!
Anyway, given the circumstances, Lydia probably wouldn’t think I was staring at her chest with lecherous eyes.
A sudden spark flickered in my mind.
…Wait. Wouldn’t it be okay to sneak a touch?
Since it’s a reversed-gender world, I’m still young and curious, and all that. I came up with various excuses in my mind, but to be honest, it was just pure lust.
Feigning an attempt to get my wallet back, I reached out my hand unexpectedly. If I could just manage to pretend to fumble at the right moment…
“Here.”
“Huh?”
Perhaps because I did it so openly from the front. Or maybe she already wasn’t going to fall for it again.
Lydia simply snatched my hand and placed the wallet she had just confiscated on top of it.
Through the thick leather, I could feel a heavy weight. …Not quite a chest, but this isn’t bad either.
Caught in a mix of feelings between delight and despair, I looked up at Lydia, who averted her gaze, seemingly embarrassed.
“I was going to scold you. My goal was to teach Jonah a lesson. But this time is an exception. Rather, it’s something I should praise you for.”
“So does that mean I can sneak around in the future?”
“…I’m praising you for wanting a nice revenge, but pickpocketing itself is still wrong.”
“Ah? I don’t even know what you think of me, Ellie and you are just like, I have common sense not to kill people randomly, you know?”
“What about the common sense that pickpocketing is wrong?”
“If you’re bound by common sense forever, you’ll never grow up.”
“…I really have a lot to teach you.”
Lydia chuckled lightly and tousled my messy hair. In the meantime, I quickly checked today’s loot.
Hmmm… I could use this.
It had quite a few fairy tale notes. But since the amount seemed substantial, I hoped the total would be considerable. At least enough to buy a meal, I thought.
“Lydia, you haven’t eaten yet, right?”
“Yeah. I’m on my way to eat now.”
“I’ll treat you this time since I earned some income! Lead the way!”
As I tapped my chest excitedly, Lydia seemed to ponder for a moment before nodding.
“Okay. I’ll be looking forward to it.”
“Yes! …But it’s not too expensive, right?”
“Don’t worry. I’m just going to my regular place.”
If it’s her regular place, it probably won’t be too expensive. I followed Lydia with a light heart.
…And then I regretted it.
*
Following Lydia, we arrived at a restaurant. I held back my rising anger and shouted.
“You liar! You tricked me!”
“Defamation, troublesome. I’ve never tricked you.”
“How can you say you go to a place like this regularly?!”
I yelled and flailed my arms as if to show everyone around.
Chandeliers swaying from the ceiling. Guests dressed according to the dress code. Neatly dressed waiters. And the menu prices starting from silver.
Oh my. 1 silver for a glass of water? Have they gone insane?
It wasn’t just water; it was filled with some magical or divine power nonsense or whatever but still, it’s just water!
“This is so expensive! This is a super high-class restaurant! Usually, a regular place should be moderately cheap and moderately tasty, right?!”
“Ahem. It’s on the cheaper side compared to the restaurants I often go to.”
“Stop lying! If that were true, even you, Lydia, would have gone broke long ago!”
“That’s not true. I still buy decent equipment.”
Lydia said with a strangely sulky tone. Now that I think about it, her wallet was from a high-ranking adventurer, so it would be pretty light… could it be?
“Be honest, Lydia. Where does all the money you earn from adventuring go? As a high-ranking adventurer, you must have a place in Labyrinth City, famous for its expensive housing, like how Ellie opened a shop.”
“…No comment.”
“Did you really just spend it all on expensive food and equipment?!”
Ignoring my shock, Lydia pointed two fingers at a nearby waiter.
“Two, please guide us.”
“Understood. A nice table has just opened up, so follow me.”
It was something quite noisy, but the waiter bowed politely as if nothing was wrong.
Now that I think about it, didn’t he frown slightly when he first saw me? He quickly returned to normal, and I thought I might have imagined it…
Now it’s clear. He must have seen my outfit and considered throwing me out, but after confirming I was with Lydia, he just let it slide.
How often had she come here to get this kind of treatment…?
As I was bewildered, Lydia, having been led by the waiter, began walking through the restaurant with her usual expressionless demeanor.
I rushed to grab Lydia’s sleeve.
“Lydia! Lydia! This place is too expensive! You know since I’m a man, it’s especially embarrassing to complain about money, but can’t we go to another place?!”
“Huh? What does being a man have to do with it?”
“I said I’d treat you! But here, the food prices, I don’t think I could even spend all my possessions!”
With my desperate whisper, Lydia tilted her head, and then her expression changed as if she realized something.
“Oh, that was serious. Don’t worry; I’ll pay.”
“Huhhh…!”
Right. Lydia knows my financial situation, so she probably wasn’t intent on eating for free. That must have just been a playful remark.
In this world, there’s an understanding that it’s courteous for women to pay, but there are limits to that.
Dining out this expensively is still too much. Certainly, Lydia is a great lady… until I heard her next words.
“But I’ll put it on Jonah’s debt.”
“……”
Is this also a joke…?