“Not even a bit pitiful, huh?”
I pick up some braised meat and potatoes with chopsticks.
Just like the soybean paste soup, it’s incredibly delicious.
The academy’s cafeteria dishes live up to their reputation, made by verified chefs, but this is even tastier.
At this point, no matter how much I dislike her, I have to admit her cooking talent.
“Delicious. You’ve got talent, Nishizawa.”
Nishizawa Eri’s face lights up at the compliment.
She giggles and says, “Hehe. If Master wants, Eri can make you soybean paste soup every morning!”
What? Every morning soybean paste soup?
Just because I praised her a little, she’s now daydreaming about crossing into another universe.
As I was about to say something about her delusions…
“Shut it, washboard. You haven’t forgotten it’s my turn now, have you?”
Shinozaki Rin steps in.
Nice timing, well cut.
“Go ahead, cow. But just remember, this fight is already won by Eri.”
“Heh, you’ll see.”
With her lips biting down, Rin bangs the pot down.
I honestly don’t expect much.
Something weird already seems to be wafting up.
“Kim Deok-Sung! I specially cooked your favorite kimchi stew!”
Kimchi stew?
Rin, who can’t cook at all, made Korean food instead of Japanese?
Was she slicing kimchi for this?
My hope has turned into anxiety.
“Now, feel free to dig in!”
Clang.
Rin opens the lid.
Inside, there’s an unidentified purple sludge that looks like it came straight out of an anime.
“W-what is this…?”
Ishihara says in a trembling voice.
Good question, what is it?
How can you make purple sludge out of kimchi?
Wasn’t the exaggeration in anime for comedic effect?
Upon closer inspection, there are chunks of kimchi floating around.
Is this really cooking?
Wouldn’t dog food be better?
“I-I’ll eat it for now, Shinozaki.”
Ishihara and Kurosawa scoop up some of the purple goo with trembling hands.
“Ugh, cough! Ack!”
Ishihara screams and collapses to the floor.
“D-delicious… Shinozaki… Are you okay…?”
Kurosawa says, while struggling to suppress his gagging, his face turning pale.
It’s the exact same reaction as when he ate Rin’s poisonous dish in Volume 2 of the original.
He’s still managing to stay polite, true to the light novel protagonist character.
“Try some too, Kim Deok-Sung.”
Rin says in a grave voice.
Do I really need to try it to find out?
But to sideline Rin from cooking duty, I have to eat it and give a ruthless evaluation afterward.
“Afterwards, I have to deliver a merciless evaluation.”
“I hate that kind of reality.”
With trembling hands, Rin scoops a spoonful of the unidentified object she insists is ‘Kimchi Stew’ and puts it in her mouth.
“Phew!”
She spits it out right away.
What on earth does this taste like?
It’s the worst flavor I’ve ever encountered in all the food I’ve eaten so far.
It’s dreadful.
It has a cosmic horror quality, something Cthulhu would crawl back into the abyss after tasting.
“Hey, Rin.”
“How is it? My cooking. Isn’t it delicious? I made it just for you…”
Rin babbles nonsense and it only fuels my frustration more.
She created this kind of thing and what? Just for me?
Honestly, I thought that all those weird culinary experiments in light novels were just exaggerations, but I never imagined it would manifest into reality without a hint of exaggeration.
People should know how to hold back, at least a little.
“Stop talking nonsense! You call this food? What the hell is this Kimchi Stew? Are you out of your mind? Even my house’s mutt wouldn’t touch this. Damn… Is it some sort of assassination attempt with this dish?”
“…That’s…”
“You didn’t taste it while you were cooking, did you? If you did, there’s no way you could create something this terrible.”
“Gah…”
Rin’s expression hardens.
There’s no way I’m going to play the nice guy and lie like the protagonist that Rin’s dish is delicious.
If I say it’s good, I’ll be eating this horrible food for a whole week?
I can’t handle such a crazy future.
It’s better to just be honest.
“Anyway, just throw this away. And you, no more cooking. Stick to doing the dishes or whatever else you’re good at. Anything but cooking.”
“Ah, I got it…”
Rin hangs her head with a dejected expression.
Her shoulders slump.
I gulp down some water.
With the cold water, I finally feel a bit normal.
“Then, the result of this competition has been determined!”
“Of course, Eri-ring wins, right? Huh? Master?”
Olivia and Nishizawa’s gaze turns to me.
Maybe it’s the damned Kimchi Stew, but my head hurts.
“You two take turns cooking. Rin will do the dishes and clean up with the other person who’s not on cooking duty.”
Since both of them have above-average cooking skills anyway, it should work to alternate.
As long as it’s not Rin again.
“Well, it’s not exactly an acceptable result, but fine. I’ll make an exception this time. Consider it an honor! Hmph.”
“Got it. Eri-ring will follow the master’s orders. Ehehe.”
“As annoying as it is… I suppose I’ll acknowledge my defeat. Gah.”
Hearing the various responses from the three, I take another bite of the Braised Meat and Potatoes Nishizawa made.
It’s still good.
Nishizawa really is perfect for being the meal assistant.
I should tell her to make curry, the national dish of Imgan School, for dinner tomorrow.
I will live for myself.
Imgan School.
The morning of the second day.
“Ugh.”
Maybe it’s because I slept poorly, but my whole body aches.
It feels like when I woke up in the A-tent during individual combat training.
My body is sore.
Even though I decided not to be on guard duty on the first day at Imgan School, it turned out like this.
Still better than the cold-weather training.
I should get used to it gradually.
“Master! Eri-ring has finished breakfast. Today’s breakfast menu is Soybean Paste Soup and Braised Meat and Potatoes!”
Looks like it’s Nishizawa’s turn to cook breakfast today.
Shaking off my drowsiness, I sit down at the picnic table.
The shade cast by the umbrella in the center of the table shields us from the fierce May morning sunlight.
I can see Ishihara and Kurosawa sitting next to me.
Rin, with her downcast expression, and an energetic Olivia are seated across from me.
Lin, with a sulky expression, and the lively Olivia sit across from me.
“You can’t return to the base camp until night after going on a daytime exploration, so you need to eat a hearty breakfast.”
Nishizawa scoops a generous amount of braised meat and potatoes, along with soybean paste soup, and speaks to me.
“There’s no need to repeat what I already know.”
The schedule at Imgan School is simple.
Daytime is for exploration, nighttime is for rest.
“I just wanted to say that out of concern for you, Master… But still, Eri, I’m so glad I can feed you soybean paste soup this morning!”
“Don’t over-attach meaning to breakfast. It’s infuriating from the start.”
I should definitely ban soybean paste soup from the menu.
What is soybean paste soup doing at Imgan School?
It should be curry.
“Hey you! Be sure to pack the inari sushi bento I, Olivia Napoleon Bonaparte, personally made later!”
Clang.
Olivia sets the bento box in front of me.
During the daytime exploration period, which runs from morning to evening, we must refrain from returning to the base camp.
Returning to the base camp before nighttime results in deductions.
So bringing a bento for lunch is a necessity, and it seems Olivia has taken charge of the bento today.
Gimbap is too complicated, so it looks like she made a relatively simple inari sushi bento.
“I’ll enjoy it. Thank you, Olivia.”
For bento, it’s either gimbap or inari sushi.
Olivia really gets my taste.
She’s not a worthless slave if you know what I mean.
“Wha-what kind of obvious compliment do you think would make me happy? You’re totally mistaken! I-I’m not happy at all!!”
Olivia turns red in the face and looks away.
Now it’s a familiar tsundere response.
Without a reply, I take a spoonful of breakfast.
Delicious.
As expected of Nishizawa’s skills as a food shuttle.
I empty my bowl in no time.
The noisy breakfast comes to an end.
All that’s left is the daytime exploration.
‘Second day morning at Imgan School…’
The original story reflexively pops into my head.
Today at noon.
In the original work, a sudden downpour hits.
Lin, caught in the downpour, trembles, soaked to the skin and cold. The protagonist rushes her into a nearby cave for shelter.
Next is predictable.
A fan service scene showing Lin’s wet figure in black and white illustrations and the protagonist embracing her under the pretext of keeping her warm.
A scene faithfully recreated with high-quality animation.
‘There’s no way I’ll be teamed up with Lin, right?’
No way, right?
I sigh.
Anyway, since the heavy rain is a fact, I need to dig a drainage ditch to avoid the tragedy of a flooded tent.
‘Ugh.’
I hate shoveling.
But shoveling is inefficient unless you’re a trained laborer.
The three girls are probably washing dishes by the nearby stream right now.
Ishihara and Kurosawa, resting in the shade, aren’t skilled workers and won’t be much help.
Once again, I, who have wielded a shovel more than a gun all through military service, have to take the lead.
‘It can’t be helped.’
Sighing, I take out the shovel issued by the academy and start working on the drainage around the tent.
“Kim, why suddenly start shoveling?”
“Brother, can I help?”
“No, I appreciate the sentiment, but you’d only get in the way, so just watch from the side.”
I shoo Ishihara and Kurosawa away.
It’s been a while since I held a shovel after my military discharge, yet the grip feels unexpectedly familiar.
Memories of military service come to mind, making me feel even worse.
I start digging the drainage ditch around the tent, accustomed to the familiar shoveling motion.
Digs out the drainage.
I have to hurry up with the work before the weekly search goes out.
Digging, digging, and digging some more.
By the time the dirt covers my whole body…
“Huff, ugh. I’m done.”
The work is finished.
I lay down the shovel and climb up to the drainage.
“Kim, awesome!”
“Hyung… You’re the best!”
Kurosawa and Ishihara give thumbs up and clap.
Naive kids.
Seeing that makes me feel a bit guilty for making them set up the two tents yesterday.
Honestly, I did push it a little.
“Hey, uh… I’m sorry for making you set up the tents just yesterday.”
“Huh? Why are you apologizing? Kim. Were you really thinking about that? It’s not worth apologizing. You’re such a kind person.”
“No need to apologize! I’ll take care of all the chores from now on, so you can just relax, hyung!”
What? Kind?
Are these guys really sweet or just gullible?
I’m worried they might get taken advantage of.
Sigh.
Anyway, I should join in when it’s time to tear down.
Wiping sweat with the towel around my neck, I clap my hands.
“Alright, everyone! We have to head out for the weekly search.”
As if they heard me, the three girls who finished washing dishes quickly approach the tent with empty bowls.
Finally, in front of the tent, all members have gathered.
“Then, let’s decide on the search teams!”
Among the gathered members, Olivia is the first to place her hand on her chest and speaks.
The search teams consist of pairs of two.
And with exactly six people, we’ll split into three teams to explore the surrounding fields, as per the rules of Imgan School.
“I want to say that the only person who can pair with Kim Deok-Sung is me, the devoted maid Olivia Napoleon Bonaparte…but…”
As soon as Olivia finishes her sentence, Nishizawa and Rin glare at her.
“…Nevertheless, I’m generous. Let’s draw lots fairly to decide the pairs.”
Olivia pulls out the lottery container.
It’s unusual for Olivia to have such a commendable thought.
A fight that could have started again from morning was quashed by her.
I want to praise her.
“The rules are simple! Whoever picks a slip with the same colored sticker at the end will be in the same group. I’ll go first.”
Olivia draws a slip.
The color of the sticker attached to the end of the slip she picked is blue.
“Next, I’ll let Eri pick. Your Highness!”
“Feel free.”
Nishizawa draws a slip.
“Blue, I’m in the same group as the princess. It’s not satisfying, but it’s not a bad outcome.”
“Who do you think you are to judge anyone?”
Olivia and Nishizawa, now in the same group, get into a banter.
The results of the drawing come quickly.
“Oh, I picked red!”
“I also got red. Ishihara. We’re in the same group.”
Ishihara, who drew red, is teamed up with the protagonist guy.
So naturally…
“I got green… Are you green too…?”
“Yeah.”
I ended up in the same group as Rin.
The green sticker attached to the end of the slip in my hand ominously glitters.
“Just me and you together… Lucky day.”
Rin smiles faintly.
Of all people, I’m paired with her.
This is definitely a sign of bad luck today.
*
The weekly search has begun.
In the lush forest affected by flooding.
Sunlight and bird songs streaming through the towering trees create a peaceful atmosphere.
