Chapter 65

Any journey is bound to have its dull and tedious travel times. If this were 21st-century Earth, I’d probably be fiddling with a game console or smartphone to pass the time, but here we are in a medieval fantasy world. Convenient and entertaining gadgets like that simply don’t exist.

I sighed, lamenting how this world’s technological progress in entertainment was painfully slow. In short, I was bored out of my mind. No matter how much I slept, the journey never seemed to end, and the carriage just kept rolling. By the time I felt a headache from oversleeping, it seemed I wasn’t the only one feeling the boredom.

Glacia was passing the time by reading a book. I glanced at the title—*The Princess Wants to Be Devoured, Volume 2 (Ages 18+ Only)*. Wait, isn’t that straight-up erotica? She’s reading that in public? Come to think of it, I once saw an old man on a bus reading something similar on his phone. Guess even in a medieval fantasy world, people like that exist.

Or maybe it’s just a particularly gory novel. Could be full of bloody descriptions. Judging a book by its cover is a bad habit. Glacia’s cheeks looked a bit red, but I’ll ignore that. If it’s full of gory descriptions, maybe she’s just the type to blush at that. It’s barbaric to jump to conclusions without knowing someone’s quirks or medical conditions.

My disciple, Airi, was sitting next to Glacia, reading the same novel. Her face was also red… Wait, is it really erotica? No, let’s not rule out the possibility that Airi has the same blushing condition as Glacia. I’m not a barbarian but a scholar who values Confucianism and Neo-Confucianism. I don’t judge books by their covers or misunderstand people without knowing them.

“Hey… don’t flip the page so fast.”

“How slow are you at reading? It’s a crucial scene, so don’t rush me.”

“Wow… erotic novels these days are so explicit…”

“I recommend reading more. This is actually on the milder side compared to other erotic novels.”

Yep, it’s definitely erotica. You can tell just by the cover, and if their faces are red, they’re definitely reading something steamy. The nomadic tribes probably figured that out faster than anyone, which is why they built the great Mongol Empire. Meanwhile, pathetic scholars kept saying, “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” while secretly reading erotica and getting invaded.

And look at them now, united in their love for erotica.

*Omnia vincit amor et nos cedamus amori.*

“Love conquers all, so let us yield to love.” It’s a line from Virgil that I personally like. But I think love is directly connected to something steamy, which is why it’s so powerful. Just look at those two, who were fighting earlier, now united in reading erotica.

So if I were to revise Virgil’s line, I’d change it to:

*Omnia vincit scabies et nos cedamus scabiei.*

“The steamy conquers all, so let us yield to the steamy.” How about that? Doesn’t it radiate the divine aura of Eros, the god of love and peace?

Ignoring the two women faithfully following that line, I turned my gaze to Camellia… and almost had a heart attack. The moment I looked, our eyes met.

“Ah, you scared me!”

Startled, I instinctively leaned back and hit my head on the window. How much durability testing does this skull of mine have to endure?

“Sister, why are you staring at me like that?”

I almost lost a child I never had. If I were a woman, I might’ve miscarried on the spot. Camellia should be thanking me with a full bow for not being tsundere.

“Werner.”

“Why are you setting the mood like that? It’s scary.”

“I’m bored.”

So she’s just bored, huh, this damn elf? A duo of Eros’s goddesses reading erotica and a gross elf who almost killed someone out of boredom. This combination is driving me insane.

“Got any interesting stories?”

I know plenty of interesting stories. Like how saying “D” twenty times makes it “smoothie,” or how Netmarble is four times bigger than Marvel, or how “grandfather” in English is “mantle,” or how “nurungji” (scorched rice) is “Bobbi Brown” in English. These are jokes my friend used to tell. I thought about using them, but if they don’t land, people usually hate them intensely.

In Camellia’s case, that intense hatred might come in the form of a stab wound, so I’d better hold back.

So how can I entertain her? After some serious thought, I came up with an answer.

“How about I tell you an interesting story?”

At that, Camellia, Glacia, and Airi all closed their books and started listening intently.

I’m not about to tell a joke like, “If you blockade a city, you get a lunchbox.” I’ll just share a story I know well.

“This is a story from a distant land, not this continent. I heard it from an acquaintance…”

“You have acquaintances?”

“Yes, so be quiet and listen. Anyway, there’s a country that looks peaceful and prosperous, but that’s just the surface. Underground, they gather orphans and train them to kill people.”

“…Not that surprising. I’ve seen plenty of organizations like that.”

True, in this world, there are plenty of groups that take in orphans to use as weapons. They usually end up getting destroyed by Werner’s comrades, with their leaders’ heads split into 21 pieces.

“But here, the system’s a bit different. When orphans come in, they’re given numbers instead of names and assigned partners.”

“Partners? That’s unusual. Most organizations raise kids either as strict individuals or in squads. A two-person team system is unique.”

“Yeah, it’s unique. For example, Number 1 is paired with Number 36, Number 302 with Number 232, Number 69 with Number 74, Number 137 with Number 333, and Number 200 with Number 204… and so on.”

Some old memories resurfaced, leaving me with a complicated feeling. It wasn’t exactly sad or angry, just an uncomfortable, lingering emotion.

“They sleep in the same room, eat together, train together, and are never apart.”

“In a facility like that, they’d definitely grow close. Is it training to build camaraderie?”

“Something like that. Officially, it’s to make them monitor each other… but later, when they’re sent on assassination missions, they’re sent together to fight side by side.”

Those damn kids made it annoying to go anywhere, always following me around. At least they didn’t follow me to the bathroom, so that’s something.

“And in the end, they lock all the orphans up and make them kill each other until only two remain.”

“That’s cruel. I’ve heard plenty of stories about organizations selecting warriors like that, but it’s always disgusting.”

“And the last two standing are usually partners. Why? Because they fight to protect their precious friend.”

Most of them died without even getting to fight properly. It was a sick way of selection.

“So do those two survive and work together? That’s a pretty unique way of forming a duo.”

“No, not at all.”

Those bastards making human weapons wouldn’t let them have a heartwarming ending like, “We survived, so let’s do our best together.”

“In the end, they lock the two in a room and force them to beat each other to death with their bare hands.”

It would’ve been better if they had weapons, but they must’ve skimped on the budget because even weapons weren’t allowed in that final fight.

“The surviving child walks out, leaving behind the friend they spent years with. It’s a system that sacrifices about 400 lives to create one assassin.”

“…That’s less ‘interesting’ and more ‘brutal,’ Werner.”

Seems I chose the wrong topic.