Chapter 63

“It’s odd how you all call me a friend when you don’t even know my face or my name. Seems like all of you are quite friendless yourselves.”

[Sudden attack?]

[Have you heard of inner intimacy?]

[??? : I’ll pay back everything you’ve given me so far]

[Internet friends are friends too]

[Well you and Victory Wilde are also just online friends so that doesn’t work]

[This actually feels like empathy not an attack lol]

[The legend is my friend]

[Didn’t I tell you my jellyfish avatar is my face and Sol the legend is my name? Have you been lying to me this whole time?]

This is something odd indeed.

Feeling an inner connection with a broadcaster as a viewer is possible.

Through watching the broadcasts, viewers slowly learn details about the person and can share a sense of time together.

Take my jellyfish avatar for example—I only used it because I needed a character to represent myself.

I just couldn’t handle using a cute girl character.

It’s not that I, as a fan of anime culture, dislike it. I just felt extremely hesitant playing the role of a female character.

I was far more comfortable broadcasting with a male voice, even if it did strain my throat.

…Seems like I’ve drifted off-topic.

Let’s get back to the main subject.

Now, what can the broadcaster feel from the viewers in reverse?

I know nothing about you—where you live, what you look like, what you do, or what you think.

You could be people of all ages, appearances, and backgrounds, and it feels wrong to lump you all into one generic category of “viewers.”

Among you, there are those who say harsh words to me, some who get mad if I don’t do what they want, others who cheer me on unconditionally, or those who donate money or message me every day to lift me up.

There are even those who forget about me after a few days, but also those who miss me for far longer…

So, how can I see all of you as just one group of ‘viewers’?

There was a time when I felt deeply let down by a classmate.

When we spent time together but they couldn’t remember much of what I had said.

As much as I tried to think, “That’s just how they are,” I couldn’t erase the feeling that if I were important to them, they would have remembered.

When forgetting even such minor details made me feel so distant, how can there be a sense of intimacy with broadcasters who don’t even remember your name?

Currently, I have 27,000 viewers.

Can I possibly memorize 27,000 nicknames or details about them?

Remembering just a small portion might even backfire, making others feel excluded.

In the end, I don’t remember anything about you…

It makes me feel incredibly sad.

When will our brains be digitized?

Won’t it all be easy if we just had a memory stick to recall everything?

“Why do you all watch my broadcasts?”

All I can address you as is “you all.”

At most, “esteemed viewers.”

It seems like I’m starting to understand why fan names are necessary.

I imagined calling you “Legend Keepers.”

Feels a bit underwhelming.

Hmm…

[There it is, the question]

[Nee, what do you like about me?]

[PTSD ALERT]

[How are you getting PTSD when you’ve never had a girlfriend?]

[Your jellyfish avatar is cute, and your voice is adorable]

[Wow. Excellent acting. Keep it up]

[Victory doesn’t broadcast much anymore]

[The bond between magical girls is stronger than steel]

[I’m just curious about how much you love this game]

[The magical girl boom is coming!]

[I watched the movie five times just to pull the Venus card]

[Sis, marry me!!!]

[Set the ASMR radio]

[Because I’m friendless]

[Because it’s just entertaining]

[So, when will you hit #1 in the rankings?]

[Teama, turn it on]

I always thought my broadcast was only popular because I’m slightly better at games than most people.

But people have gathered here for so many different reasons.

It surprises me.

“Lies! You watch just to see me fail.”

[Oh no!]

[Busted af]

[What? I watched even when you were broadcasting as a guy]

[Are you just driving away everyone who discovered your secret?]

[Purebred Legend fans only!]

[Roasted lol]

It’s not that I can’t see myself objectively.

Victory Wilde’s friend, good at games—that alone didn’t draw in this many people, did it?

It’s the pretty voice, and the suspiciously skilled gaming woman.

I have some idea how much that plays a part.

“I’m feeling a bit flustered. Hmm… Is that it? Is this really why so many people have gathered here? Anyway, it’s just a passing trend, right? Once the bubble bursts, only a handful will remain.”

[Wow, this reeks of estrogen]

[No, we don’t stir the soup by insulting the audience]

[Oh legend, you’re so cute, we must coddle you]

[Feminine voices, move aside (while pretending to woo)]

[F forever L lover]

[Nonsensical actions from you continue]

As if people were some kind of clingy women.

Do men not think like this? Should they?

“It’s not right to try and saddle me with this strange MH image.”

[Of course, the person sobbing and doing a drunk broadcast in the morning says this]

[Match the line to the person]

<lmao>

[Reminder donated 10,000 Won]

“??? : I have no friends. I feel so lonely I might die. Please stay with me.”

[Earning 10 Won just to retraumatize people seems too harsh]

[The film reel broke, so I have no memory]

[Your jokes are getting old]

[Boo, trash]

“Ugh, aaah, gah!”

[That’s the sound of suffering lol]

[Kindly use human language, Master]

[Is she malfunctioning?]

[The next blanket please]

[Kick this blanket 800 years worth]

[Does that mean 800 years of broadcasts?]

The frustration of not being able to meet anyone in real life, the stress of possibly leaking personal information,

and a night of uncontrolled drinking that culminated in an embarrassingly bad history worth preserving indefinitely.

Maybe I’m a bit pitiable?

But, before feeling pity…

Isn’t my face around 40 degrees right now?

“I’ve decided to graduate from broadcasting and return to a normal civilian life. Thank you all for your love and for making it fun while it lasted.”

[-End-]

[Ah, the end of the era for Seol]

[Let’s reincarnate!]

[Had a black history so bad reincarnation is the only option]

[Next avatar better be a cute girl, please]

“No, if I’m quitting the broadcast, why are you all talking as if reincarnation is an assumption?”

[But you have no friends]

[In all honesty, what else will you do outside of internet broadcasting? Lol]

[Is the name “Legend Keeper” really that bad you’d go as far as reincarnation?]

[Legend dies without friends!]

[How do you plan to run after having set up a company?]

[Editor donated 10,000 Won]

–”Am I getting fired?”

“No, it’s a joke, just pretending to be someone else!”

[Manager donated 10,000 Won]

–”Am I getting fired too?”

“Stop pretending! Holy! It’s really Manager!”

[Wowwww]

[He’s so round]

[Shall we discard our manager? Shall we discard our manager?]

[You’re not alone anymore!]

[A sad story of girl household thinkable]

[Shall we begin our capitalist journey?]

[Not alone… Worrying!]

[You go]

[Though that word wasn’t even mentioned yet?]

It’s true.

The talk of quitting was a joke, but now I actually feel like quitting would be tough because I’ve expanded the stage so much that I can’t escape.

But why do they think I can’t quit because I’m lonely?

I’m not sure if I consider you all friends?

“Friends…”

Friends were historically defined as those you played with and chatted with.

So are we really friends? Is that true?

“Meanies…”

These guys only care about mocking and tormenting others, right?

I thought this earlier, but they can’t be lumped into one category like that.

“Rather than the consumer and service provider relationship, wouldn’t it be better to be friends?”

Is it preferable to relate as people, sincerely, instead of maintaining an abstract business relationship?

But,

“Lies are safe to the extent of their falsity, but sincerity brings wounds proportional to its truth.”

The distance between drifting apart from someone pretending to be a friend and drifting from someone you truly believe is a friend feels different.

What if they betray me because I considered them friends?

What if they all turn their backs and leave me?

I’ve heard it somewhere.

Broadcasters should not reveal 100% of themselves.

Because showing everything isn’t good for either the viewers or the broadcaster.

’So, maybe I should go with the big-chested avatar setting?’

Since they say you shouldn’t show 100% of yourself…