Chapter 55

For a moment, I was at a loss for words.

The words Iris threw at me were a shock too great to process with a clear mind. If Viviana made me feel like she was treating me like a prostitute, Iris was outright saying it to my face.

A painful truth I never wanted to face was unfolding before my eyes. My chest tightened as I tried to force a smile, but my frozen face refused to comply.

“…You’re going too far, Iris. Are you sure you’re okay with me telling Viviana about this?”

I managed to counter with a cold, sinking voice and gaze. But despite my threat, Iris snorted and mocked me.

“Go ahead and tattle.”

“Huh…?”

“Try snitching. It won’t change anything.”

“…What makes you so confident?”

“You should know your place. Stop wasting the Princess’s time. Do you even know how busy she is?”

Iris’s boldness far exceeded my imagination. Could she be a hidden bloodline of the ducal family? Or perhaps from a powerful household?

…Or maybe.

A fleeting hypothesis crossed my mind, but I quickly erased it. There’s no way they’d assign a secret weapon, something even the game couldn’t handle, to serve me.

“…Does Viviana know you’re like this?”

“Hmm, she probably does.”

Iris seemed to ponder for a moment before continuing with a mocking smile.

“Should I call her over?”

“…Huh?”

“Wait a moment.”

With a voice devoid of emotion, Iris left the room. Left alone in the bedroom, I stared blankly, trying to make sense of the situation.

Is she really going to bring Viviana?

I couldn’t understand Iris’s actions. Why did she suddenly become so hostile? Was she dissatisfied with serving me, like Siriel?

“…Annoying. I won’t let you off, Iris.”

It doesn’t matter.

No matter who Iris is, I have no reason to care. In the end, she’s just Viviana’s servant, and Viviana is deeply infatuated with me.

If Viviana finds out Iris insulted me by calling me a prostitute, Iris won’t escape Viviana’s wrath.

Then I’ll ask Viviana to banish Iris from this mansion forever, to never let her set foot in the ducal family again.

I’ll laugh heartily at Iris’s regretful face. Even if she grabs my ankles and begs for forgiveness, I won’t forgive her.

I was certain of it.

Viviana is captivated by me; she’ll surely take my side.

Trying to ignore the rising anxiety, I looked at the mirror and forced a faint smile.

—

“Just make up and end it.”

Thud—

Viviana spoke in a low, annoyed voice. Her indifferent tone made my heart sink to the pit of my stomach.

Unable to accept Viviana’s words, I grabbed her sleeve with trembling hands.

“V-Viviana… She called me a prostitute. Do you know how hurt I am…”

Viviana glared sharply at Iris.

“We’ll talk later.”

“Yes, my lord.”

A cold air flowed, but it wasn’t as severe as I expected. I thought she’d banish Iris with a fiery gaze, but it seemed like she’d just scold her a bit.

Isn’t it normal to be angry if someone you like is called a prostitute…? Why is she trying to end it like this?

And why is she leaving me alone to talk to Iris? I’m the one who’s hurt, so why is she meeting Iris alone?

“Tina, I’ll scold her properly, so don’t worry.”

Viviana tried to reassure me, but my chest only ached more.

This can’t end like this. I can’t let it end like this.

If it ends like this, I can clearly see how much Iris will look down on me in the future. Desperately, I grabbed Viviana.

“Tina?”

“…Banish her.”

“Huh?”

“Banish Iris from the mansion.”

My direct words left both Iris and Viviana stunned. Suppressing tears ready to burst, I looked straight into Viviana’s violet eyes.

Please, Viviana.

Just this once, take my side.

I won’t see you as a fool anymore.

It’ll be hard, but I’ll try to be more honest with you.

I’ll try to rely on you more.

Because I’ve started to like you more…

So please…

Just this once, take my side.

Please…

“Hmm… Tina.”

But the moment I saw the troubled look in Viviana’s eyes, I instinctively knew.

Viviana wouldn’t choose me.

“Iris is quite capable in many ways. Banishing her is too much… I’ll scold her properly so she won’t say such things again.”

“…”

A sense of detachment, as if my soul was leaving, washed over me. An indescribable emptiness and loss weighed heavily on my chest.

Capable.

A word so far removed from me, who can do nothing but flatter. If people’s worth is measured by capability, I’m nothing but a worthless existence at the bottom.

Iris is capable. In contrast, I’m utterly incapable. That’s why Viviana didn’t choose me.

Iris was right. I’m just a pet. A toy that’s loved but eventually discarded, easily bored of. That fact completely shattered the faint self-esteem I had left.

My hand, clutching Viviana, fell limply to the floor along with my gaze.

My chest burned as if filled with lava, and my body had no strength left to even move a finger.

What am I even doing here?

“Calm down. I’ll come back later.”

Viviana patted my head once and left the room. Iris hesitated in front of me for some reason, then followed Viviana out.

My body began to tremble.

I’m cold.

I wrapped my arms around myself. But the chilling cold still enveloped me, and my body wouldn’t stop shaking.

I lifted my trembling body onto the bed and wrapped myself tightly in the blanket.

But the cold remained.

No matter how much I rubbed my hands together, the cold wouldn’t go away.

“I’m cold…”

I hate it. I hate this cold so much. I thought I wouldn’t feel it anymore…

At times like this, she was always by my side…

My breathing grew heavier. I placed a hand on my suffocating chest and crawled off the bed, lying face down on the cold floor.

Struggling, I got on all fours and sat on the chair. The large mirror on the elegant table stared back at me.

As I placed my hand on the mirror, the girl within it held my hand.

“Help me…”

The only friend who always smiled beautifully at me, who was always alone. I lowered my head, thinking of her.

“Help me… I’m so tired… I want to die again…”

I called out to her desperately, but there was no answer.

Of course. She couldn’t be here. The woman in the mirror was ‘me’ with blue eyes and snow-white hair.

The thought that I could no longer see her finally brought the tears I had been holding back.

“Sniff… Sob…”

Once the tears started, they poured out uncontrollably. I couldn’t bear to see my ugly, sobbing self, so I covered my mouth with my hand and bowed my head deeply.

Anyone… Please show me some affection… Just a little, some attention…

『Don’t cry.』

Then, a voice came.

A voice I had missed so much, had longed for so desperately.

I turned my wide-eyed gaze to the mirror.

In the mirror was still me.

But it wasn’t me.

Not the pitiful, tear-streaked weakling, but a girl with a tender, gentle smile.

“Huh…?”

『Why are you crying again?』

“Huh, huh…?”

The girl in the mirror smiled faintly. But I instinctively knew who she was.

In the girl’s blue eyes was a black cross, comforting and warming my heart even in the darkest skies.

“You, you’re…? It’s really you?”

The girl in the mirror nodded.

『Yes. But I can’t be seen now.』

“Huh, how…? How can I see you?”

The girl in the mirror fell silent for a moment. Her black cross stared at me for a while. Afraid she might disappear, I gripped the mirror tighter.

『Just break like before.』

The girl in the mirror smiled meaningfully. Her smile seemed to know something.

『Then, see you next time.』

“W-wait…”

I called out to her desperately, staring at the mirror, but the girl’s eyes still shone blue like mine.

But I wasn’t lonely anymore. I wasn’t cold anymore.

She’s here.

With me, in this world.

The thought that I wasn’t alone anymore made me open my eyes brightly again.

If she can be by my side again.

I could find courage again.

The condition to meet her was the same as before.

To break.

Fortunately, I knew all too well how to break.

“Okay… I’ll break more.”

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