Chapter 46

[Oh, jealousy…?]

“It fits, doesn’t it? You’re not uncomfortable with the sight of that neutral creature Aru crying on my lap, following my every command, are you? That’s called jealousy. Even if you’ve never felt it in your life.”

[No, it is not. Jealousy stems from a narrow-minded and sinful emotion. How could I harbor such thoughts…]

“Hmm? Then you won’t mind if I just play around with Aru? Since you claim you don’t feel jealous.”

[…]

The expected reply from the Saintess fails to arrive.

I smirked.

I wonder if the ever-gracious Saintess still wears her smile at this very moment. It truly intrigues me.

“Don’t deny it. There’s nothing shameful about jealousy. Whether man or woman, it’s a natural feeling to have. Seeing your beloved getting cozy with someone else naturally stirs envy within you. We call that jealousy.”

[…Is that so.]

“Yeah, kkkk.”

[To feel such shallow emotions… Clearly my cultivation isn’t sufficient enough yet. I must redouble my efforts.]

“Ahhahaha! Only someone like Saintess could dress up jealousy in such a noble manner!”

Lacking cultivation, huh?

A true statement befitting a saintess. The eloquence of a learned one.

“Hahaha, good. As a commemoration of Saintess’ acknowledgment, I’ll share some good news with you.”

“And what might that be?”

“As you know, there are various forms of love. Beyond the common romantic love between couples, there’s parental love, friendship, sibling bonds… The word ‘love’ doesn’t solely mean affection between the opposite sex.”

[A most reasonable explanation.]

“Among these, there’s also Lord’s love. Surely you understand what that means? It’s the love you showed me during our time in Tartarus. Though your love gradually shifted towards romantic affection.”

[Indeed.]

“What I’m saying is, you don’t need to feel jealous. What I give to Aru is merely the Lord’s love you taught me.”

[Ah…!]

“You know? You’re the only one I’ve ever… uh… fantasized about. No need for further explanations, right?”

[Huh, hahaha…]

The Saintess’ voice trembles with quiet emotion. Soon after, a somewhat eerie yet satisfied laughter echoes around.

Though I was just talking about nocturnal emissions which practically amounted to relieving stress while imagining her, why does she sound so grateful? Women are truly incomprehensible.

“Hm? What’s all this noise?”

The creature lying on my lap enjoying a belly rub looks up at me with an expressionless gaze.

“I love you, you little thing.”

“Kung kung… Give me more meat. I’ve done everything you asked.”

“Alright, go ahead and eat.”

“KUNG KUNG KUNG! KUNG KUNG KUNG KUNG!”

Wheee!

With a joyful bark, Aru dashes off in the direction I threw the meat. Having sent off the disturbance, I turn my attention back to the cross.

At that moment, the Saintess spoke.

[I love you too.]

“Out of nowhere?”

[Sincerely, truly, more than anything else, I love you. For your sake, I would do anything.]

“Doesn’t this make you uneasy? A saintess of the Holy Order claiming such things… Isn’t a priest supposed to maintain purity of both body and spirit?”

My pointed remark makes the Saintess’ breathing falter. Has she suddenly remembered her duties as a priestess? Just accept your corruption already.

[There is no issue.]

“Huh? Why’s that?”

[It is now the year 214 of the Empire. From the year 114 to 394, the church allowed priests to marry and encouraged them to have a single lover. It was a doctrine following the Messiah’s teaching of ‘be fruitful and multiply’.]

Ah, that’s right. I’ve heard of that.

Until the church became corrupt with the priests’ promiscuous lifestyles, eventually leading a saintess of the era to completely ban marriage and relationships for priests.

It was quite the major event. Some believers even left the Holy Order due to being accustomed to their decadent lifestyle. Looking back, it was probably for the best. After all, five hundred years later, the Holy Nation was considered the most righteous among the seven kingdoms.

[Therefore, until the year 394, I am permitted to court you without issue.]

“So what? We’re just talking through a communication device.”

[A precious time indeed. And… all priests indulge in minor transgressions occasionally. The church turns a blind eye to it.]

“Hahahaha! True, if anyone can transgress, it’s Saintess! You’re the only apostle of the Lord I recognize! Though come to think of it, aren’t the others lacking in integrity? Their whole lives seem to revolve around transgression!”

[There are many kind priests out there. You just haven’t met them.]

“Heheh, is that so? Then introduce me to some sometime! Sounds fun.”

We’ve been talking for almost twenty minutes already, yet I still have mountains of things I want to discuss with the Saintess.

These mere twenty minutes have been the most enjoyable since I returned.

“Can we communicate again tomorrow?”

[Yes, anytime.]

“Should I cast the telecommunication magic?”

[Yes, I will wait patiently.]

“Hmph, what’s the point of doing all this if I’m just going to betray you tomorrow? If I had known, I would’ve suffered for five hundred years for nothing.”

[When you spoke those words at the guillotine, I felt your unwavering sincerity. I believed in you.]

“Tch, now I don’t even know what to say. Alright then, see you tomorrow.”

[Yes. Please stay safe. Oh, and… could you switch lines with Rangwang briefly?]

Just seconds before the communication cuts off, the Saintess softly requests. I oblige willingly.

“Since it’s a request from Saintess herself, I must comply. Aru! Come here!”

“KUNG!”

“Here, press this cross against your ear.”

“KUNG!”

Following the Saintess’ request, I switch lines to Aru.

In the final second before the connection ends, the Saintess whispers gently.

[For the next five hundred years, please keep moving forward diligently. Afterwards, it will be my eternal time with you…]

“KUNG?”

With Aru’s innocent response, the communication cuts off.

***

A space layered with deep darkness.

A place devoid of light, sound, or wind – only silence exists.

The Spirit World.

Even in this realm where civilization cannot exist, where existence itself should be impossible, a floor still exists.

A massive disc-shaped stone floor.

In the center of this stone floor stands a towering pillar reaching towards the sky. Though calling it “sky” is meaningless in this pitch-black void where gravity holds no sway. In the Spirit World, “below” refers to where the stone floor lies. Thus, the direction the pillar ascends is indeed “upward”. A bizarre sky absent of stars, moonlight, or sunlight.

On top of this pillar rests a shorter pillar intersecting the vertical one. An infinitely enormous cross shape marks the center of the Spirit World.

And at the heart of this “cross” hangs…

“Ugh…!”

A human woman, suspended in spirit form.

Her arms spread wide – or rather, forcibly stretched apart by nails larger than two human hands.

“Ugh! Haa, ugh, ngh…”

She writhes in agony, unable to move due to the nails piercing her flesh. Pain courses through her continuously.

Her name is Maria. Destined to become the one and only saintess of the Holy Order five hundred years from now.

Currently, she is nothing more than a prisoner paying the price of karma.

“Haa, haa… Ngh! Ugh…”

From her cracked lips escape tormented moans that she had been suppressing while screaming into the void moments ago. Her breathing comes in ragged gasps.

“Ngh… My… Lord…”

Maria calls out to her master in a desperate voice. No answer comes.

Maria believes. She firmly believes that beside her unseen Lord watches over her with divine grace.

Yet all she finds beside her are the cold iron cross and the loneliness of solitude.

Pain exists.

Suffering exists.

Hope, warmth, light, grace – none of these exist.

Could this truly be the Lord’s intention?

“Blasphemous… thoughts…”

It is blasphemous.

Futile wandering thoughts.

“Love… Love… Love…”

Darkness acts like insects. They gnaw at one’s heart, making one consider things they normally wouldn’t.

Like how a child lying in bed after the lights are turned off begins imagining ghosts.

Such insects of doubt have begun nesting within Maria’s heart.

But Maria…

“Shall look solely upon the radiant Lord…”

The fortress of faith that Maria has built…

“To love those around… To love the world… To love… the Lord.”

Won’t so easily be tainted by doubt.

Do not question.

The moment you doubt hope, all that remains is despair.

Even if surrounded by nothing but despair, have faith only in hope.

Maria firmly reminds herself of this pure spirit.

“My belief… is directed towards the Lord.”

“My hope… signifies the Lord.”

“This too is… the Lord’s grace…”

Truthfully, until the communication magic connected her with Oscar, Maria had been trembling with fear.

Having sent countless Morse code signals already, but Oscar somehow failed to notice each time. Unaware of the circumstances, Maria shed silent tears, believing she had been abandoned for five hundred years.

Then, as if by miracle, the communication magic activated.

Whether this was truly the Lord’s grace.

Or simply Oscar, the demon, finally noticing the Morse code and activating the communication magic.

Nobody knows. Maria believes in both.

“Love…”

Maria’s single word carries heavy weight. Now able to see ahead, yet seeing nothing, Maria quietly closes her eyes.

Watching over Maria from afar is an existence.

A place where nothing should exist, a purely penal realm devoid of color and scent.

Yet a child stands there, defying logic.

Far enough away that light cannot reach, a child gazes at Maria with eyes painted black. Wearing an expressionless face like a blank canvas.

The abyss-like black sunglasses and crimson horns fluttering like waves emit light amidst the darkness.

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