Chapter 40

040.

“…Selfish person.”

To the extent that Azcalc vowed to himself, hearing Serasie’s inner thoughts, which he had never confessed to her, felt harsh.

At first sight, he fell in love with a girl but due to circumstances, he had to let her go.

Would it be appropriate to say it was unfortunate?

If it had been solely a pure, unfortunate tragedy, it would have undoubtedly been described as such.

Unfortunately, though,

that tragedy ended up creating another victim.

Humans, at times, are like that.

When pushed to the brink, they lose their sanity.

Serasie erasing all trust and truth in the world,

Azcalc’s insistence on keeping his daughter close, even at the cost of hurting her,

such a tragic love story might evoke pity from people.

But to Serasie, it was nothing more than a repugnant excuse from a coward who fled.

“I didn’t ask for understanding. Didn’t I say this was something I’ve resolved to do?”

Abandoning parental affection, he vowed to remain undisturbed by any reproach just to keep his daughter by his side.

However, pondering it and experiencing it firsthand were worlds apart.

Upon hearing Serasie’s reproachful words, his heart was unable to stay calm.

“You didn’t ask for understanding?”

A calm voice with a certain hesitancy, it resembled the struggling moment just before an explosion.

Serasie stared directly at her father, who had driven her to the point of feeling sick with revulsion, and said:

“No, you just ran away out of fear.”

If that was what he truly felt,

then what was he trying to convey?

Love?

By claiming love, was he implying that it was alright to hurt and let go?

“That daughter you supposedly loved was merely seven years old.”

Due to circumstances, he had to let go of his beloved wife.

Due to circumstances, he had to ignore his beloved daughter.

To Serasie, that sounded like nothing more than a convenient excuse.

“If you truly loved so much, you should have given up something else. The head of the house instead of mother, the north instead of me!”

Serasie’s father, Azcalc Hiart, was the highly anticipated young lord of the Hiart family.

The north and Hiart were not just his home but also something precious that he had to protect.

Thus, he had to make a choice.

Between his wife and the leadership of the family.

Between the north and his daughter.

Even if both were precious to him and couldn’t coexist,

it was natural to let go of one.

At the crossroads of such a choice,

Azcalc chose the north and the family.

That was all.

“Maybe you should have not married mother at all.”

Serasie decided to accept everything.

The Duke of the North, whom she called father,

placed the north and the family above her and her mother.

For some reason, because of a boy,

a sob could be heard behind the mask that showed no signs of being fixed.

With a cold voice, worthy of the eldest daughter of the northern house, she spoke:

“Ultimately, because of Father’s stubbornness, Mother and I couldn’t escape the shackles of regretful love.”

Your love, she said, was nothing more than a misinterpreted excuse.

“I feel too sorry for you.”

Serasie thought of Kalen at the same time.

In a way, it looked like her father and he had little difference.

At the end,

Azcalc couldn’t withstand the external pressure of northern traditions and let go of her mother and herself.

Kalen was different.

Even in a situation surrounded by fog and monsters where there was no way to escape,

while he couldn’t offer help, he didn’t just become a burden due to personal wounds.

Willingly, he took on that burden.

How could one possibly forget the sight of him doing so?

One arm lost to a monster.

The other to her.

He must have disliked it.

It was only natural that it must have hindered him.

No matter who was brought to that situation, abandoning her would have been too obvious.

Just as the person called “father” had abandoned her and her mother.

“Father, who left me to be so lonely that I wanted to die.”

In the weakest moments, he readily became a place to lean on.

Whispering desperate wishes and promises.

Even in the short time they had been together, he had become unique in trusting each other beyond anyone else.

And that ideal, which she so desperately sought, was there.

How could one not reach out?

What woman could not fall for it?

“…Serasie.”

“As per your promise, I will take over the position of head. Duke, you said you would safeguard it until an appropriate age. Please honor that.”

Serasie faced the now completely collapsed wall of her heart.

An overwhelmingly large wave of emotion washed over her.

Though she had feared that wave, it was filled with unexpected warmth.

It felt more peaceful than before she accepted it.

It was like when she and Kalen were on the summit of Hiart Mountain.

Her heart, tinged with a soft crimson, changed its focus entirely onto one person.

The knights entrusted to guard her who soon betrayed her,

the utterly disgusting Toren,

and Makbel, who had been the longest connection and thus the most shocking when it ended,

the regrettable past she imagined while the father who actually abandoned her,

all false relations with them were erased.

Only a promise with one person remained.

Hooking little fingers and then thumbs to seal a promise,

though no grand vow had been exchanged,

it was precisely because of that it became the most trustworthy.

Even now, outside, a boy was still watching over her.

That title of ‘Duke’ instead of ‘Father’ would leave an indelible mark on Azcalc.

The Duke who believed he was protecting his daughter but in truth was protecting himself,

ended up being abandoned by the wife and daughter he had so deeply loved.

It was a regret that would never fade, an unchangeable mark.

Wiping her soaked eyes harshly, Serasie glared at Azcalc then left the room.

“Duke…”

If only he had discarded everything and chosen his family.

Would something have been different?

Azcalc endlessly repeated Serasie’s words in his mind,

only gazing at the tightly shut door.

*

Bang!

“Aah. You came out,”

Who knows if there was someone targeting Serasie.

Guarding in front of the head’s quarters had grown a bit tiresome.

But Kalen inadvertently overheard a sound from inside.

Azcalc’s words were inaudible, but Serasie’s agitated shout resounded to Kalen beyond the head’s quarters.

Judging from it, there seemed to be complex circumstances between the father and daughter.

For this reason, Kalen was intending to console Serasie when she came out but unexpectedly became flustered due to the situation.

Because Serasie, upon roughly opening the door, directly fell into his arms.

“Just for a moment…”

The muttering voice inside his arms.

It was so pitifully wet,

quivering as if frightened.

“Just let me stay like this for a moment…”

Unaccustomed to hugging people,

Serasie grabbed him tightly, fearing he might run away.

Feeling a little suffocated, Kalen scratched his chin,

then gently eased her hold and pulled her into a relaxed embrace.

“That tight hugging will suffocate me.”

“…”

It seemed those words triggered something,

and Serasie’s murmuring grew even wetter.

“I… I’ve never hugged anyone before because I’m tall for a woman…”

Serasie, who had despised her own body,

was tall but with curved breasts and hips.

As a woman or as a knight,

her body was inadequate in both ways.

Recalling Serasie’s words, Kalen embraced her more softly.

It felt like the right thing to do.

“Kalen.”

As they embraced for a while, Serasie’s breathing stabilized,

but she remained in his arms and asked:

“Will you not leave?”

Inside, the words that her father had left her and her mother must have reached her ears.

Was this question born from that insecurity?

The guarding was practically over,

so saying “I’ll leave” would have been the right response.

That would have been the correct answer.

But even someone with poor perception could see that wasn’t what Serasie wanted to hear.

Fortunately, Kalen was quick-witted,

and instead of words, he patted her back.

So,

what had been the largest event in the north, the civil war,

unexpectedly ended in the victory of Serasie Hiart.

Though everyone applauded Serasie’s remarkable feat,

the fact that a young boy who wasn’t even from the north played the biggest role in her victory,

remained a secret known only to those who had been on Hiart Mountain that day.

*

Toren Hiart ended up spending a while in prison.

Under the empire’s law, carrying out his sentence requires several complicated procedures.

It was natural that it would take a long time.

Until someone from the royal family arrived, Toren Hiart had no choice but to remain locked in his family’s basement.

The current royal family of Claire Empire aims to concentrate power.

The fact that the troublesome northern duke had dabbled in the strictly forbidden trafficking of slaves was not a trivial matter,

but thanks to Azcalc and Serasie’s swift actions,

Toren received the full brunt of the punishment alone.

Such days passed casually.

“Festival?”

“Yeah. Festival.”

The promised guard duties were safely completed.

Just as Kalen was preparing to leave, Serasie’s invitation caught him.

Northern traditional festival.

That was the kind of invitation she extended to him.

“It’s not really a festival; it’s more like a traditional large-scale bonfire viewing in the north…”

Serasie slightly bowed her head

and muttering, held her hands behind her.

“If you really don’t want to, it’s fine to just relax…”

If he didn’t come, she would be a little disappointed, making it hard to refuse.

The north placed great emphasis on tradition, making him curious about what it felt like.

“…Like, are there any bets or games with a strong element of chance?”

“Uh? Bets?”

Naturally, a festival should include some traditional games, Kalen asked in slight excitement.

“Hmm…nothing that could really be called a bet, I think.”

Seeing Kalen’s slightly disappointed expression, Serasie quickly added:

“Maybe if you look well enough, you’ll find something! I… want something too… well…”

Slightly,

it seemed like Kalen’s lips curled up a bit.

“Alright, I’ll come.”

Fortunately, Kalen agreed to join the northern traditional festival.