Chapter 268

A girl with a rather dazed expression reflects in a large wall mirror.

With a light touch of makeup, her hidden mature charm reveals itself slightly. Who could she possibly be? …Well, of course, it must be me. Wake up a little.

Perhaps my reason was temporarily taking a vacation due to the answer that came out surprisingly easily.

I almost reflexively turned my head towards Erin, forgetting that I was in the middle of getting my makeup done. However, the manager firmly held my head with one hand, as if moving during the service was a crime, preventing the image from blurring as soon as she finished designing it.

Thank you… But could you please ease the pain in my skull a bit?

“Anastasia, you can move your mouth freely, but you can’t twist your body like that! The upper body is fixed!!”

“Uh, ah… I’m sorry.”

Nonetheless, while I felt a headache from the pressure being applied, most of my attention remained on the announcer, who maintained a rather indifferent demeanor.

I pretended to prod a little, as if it was just an extension of general conversation. I expected a somewhat serious answer, yet I was met with a response bordering on self-deprecation, bordering on self-torture.

Should I ask again, wanting to hear an opinion without jokes? Would that come off as a bit strange?

More than that, I was straightening my posture before I could properly check Erin’s expression, making me unsure whether she had actually replied angrily like that… or if it was just a habitual response.

But thankfully, my worries didn’t last very long.

As if she had read my bustling inner thoughts, even without me examining her face closely, she spoke with surprisingly earnestness.

“Why are you so surprised? Ah, have you perhaps never met a person who speaks like that? As soon as you greet someone and turn around, a girl who looks perfectly fine somehow ends up being a head case and a slave to broadcasting, and sometimes people even feel sorry for that.”

“That’s definitely… a bit much.”

“It’s quite annoying for me every time these overly invested people show up. But what can I do? It’s not explicitly stated anywhere in the contract, but in the end, it’s all part of the job.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Erin leaning her elbows on the front shelf of the mirror, resting her chin on her fists, watching me.

Could it possibly be that her hair was not actually her real head but rather a wig that looked that perfect? The flawless hair, beautifully framing her face, enhanced the serious aura she presented.

“You speak so easily… Have you gotten used to dealing with people now?”

“No, no! It’s the opposite! Thinking deeply about it is weirder! How long has our model lady been working? Half a year? Or is it even less than that?”

I didn’t want to break the atmosphere by bringing up something like, “You still haven’t even signed a contract, so you’re basically a clean slate, right…?”

For now, I decided to listen to her beliefs.

If she had a level of mental fortitude I would consider to be a solid work ethic or belief, I wanted to learn from the expert.

“Work is just work. And we are selling well-packaged images. Moreover, it’s not like I’m intentionally deceiving anyone, nor am I inventing false stories out of thin air, like in variety shows or reality shows.

The corporate devils and so on, and the citizens’ groups. There might be slightly omitted information, but what needs to be conveyed in top news within the allotted time is fixed. And to ask me to read the script in a way I please is just absurd.”

“…Even if you get unnecessary insults for that?”

“If I’m an irritating and crazy person, then let them curse me! Who told them to swallow my image on TV and get misled? Worrying too much about the thoughts of those around you is foolish!”

Having experienced more than actual movie actors or comedians, she spoke with an impressive level of persuasion, causing me to briefly fall into thought while watching Erin’s gestures as she waved her hands in dismissal, as if it were some unnecessary worry.

Too much concern about others… But isn’t it natural to think that way?

There’s always a reason people can’t stop building connections and seeking feedback, knowing it might leave scars.

I think the desire to crave acknowledgment from others is one of the obsessions engraved in human genes and instincts… At least, that’s what I believe.

Of course, I’m not living to be recognized by others, though I strongly feel troubled when things keep interfering with my responsibilities.

Is it really greed to wish for good relationships when someone remembers me? That’s too much.

Living in this harsh world… just as I was about to lament it in my mind, she, showcasing her flexible nerves and perspectives, leaned forward, piercing through my thoughts.

“Hoping that everyone you meet will like you is arrogance, little lady, even if you have the princess-like beauty that combines Eastern and Western fairy tales. You’ve probably encountered at least one or two jerks who’ve said they didn’t want to stand next to you.”

“Uh…?”

Did that really happen…? I almost found myself agreeing unknowingly.

Initially, I brought up the topic to get fundamental advice on interpersonal relationships or tips about attitudes in life.

But now, it felt like a consultation about the stress of social life as a rookie model, and Erin, with an exceedingly satisfied smile, kindly moved the stray hair from my face behind my ear while continuing her lecture.

“Well, I can’t say I wasn’t ambitious when I first joined, thinking I could handle any script, but because I built up experience like that, I can’t deny my guilt completely. But what’s so wrong with acting out the image some people want? If I were to act nicely, they’d just whisper about how boring I was while I earn a high salary.”

“…You mean to just ignore it and not let it bother you?”

“I get that it’s easier said than done, but I’m not quite at that level of mentality yet.”

What should I answer?

Sorry, but I don’t have such thick skin? Sorry, but it’s really tough to have a facade of indifference?

While I contemplated what kind of sentence I could add to convey to her that I appreciated the advice, but it would be difficult for me to follow, a pointed remark about the core of my concerns suddenly struck me and resonated deeply in my ears.

“And even if it’s not about work, you’ll inevitably meet people who evaluate others based only on their own opinions as you live your life. When you involve yourself in this industry, you should’ve been prepared to be disliked. You’re completely a baby, especially your skin, little one.”

“…Huh?”

My shoulders shuddered! And added to that, perhaps due to the makeup, the pupils in my eyes reflected in the mirror widened slightly.

“Prepared to be disliked”—what a strangely resonant phrase, entering my heart naturally.

“If I could just do better…”

“Hey! You didn’t listen to me at all; it’s not related at all, you know? If you wanted to change the mind of those jerks, you’d need to throw them a life preserver just before they drown; otherwise, they won’t think differently.”

“That’s right! Even if Erin unnie pulls in the ratings with boring materials, the director always compares them with the best days and keeps nagging….”

“…You can’t go around saying things like that outside, and I can’t cover for you if you get caught?”

“Eh…!”

Before I knew it, the manager joined in and began chattering, and I briefly fell into thought.

Yes, that’s right. Even in games, it’s impossible to raise everyone’s affinity at the same time, requiring multiple iterations. Why was I worrying so much, like I had to gain support from everyone like a perfectionist?

In reality, it wouldn’t make any difference if parallel-world users liked me.

As they say, it just happens; somehow, I ended up with an appearance that seemed inherently harmless and easy to gain the favor of an unspecified majority? And I was supposed to just be cautious of the most dangerous issues? Until when, and how much longer?

Of course, there’s not many people like Kajun who find me extremely annoying yet agree to just do their own thing, but until now, I’ve somehow been lucky to reach a consensus and get through… Still, remaining disconnected from reality is the same.

I want to satisfy everyone’s expectations. I want to maintain the connections I’ve built smoothly.

Those are naturally human feelings, and striving to meet them isn’t wrong, is it? However, being excessively concerned with them is truly foolish.

If I have clear responsibilities to take care of… conflicts are an unavoidable side effect in some cases.

“Alright, it’s all done! Although I’m also our stylist’s assistant, if you need to change the tone during the shoot, just wipe a little with this cleansing oil….”

“…….”

Under a light flicker of the light, my eyes were sparkling and lips moist, having been treated with something that shined when the angle of the light hit.

Due to just a quick wash and casual drying, my previously frizzy hair now lay neatly and softly fluttered.

In the mirror, I saw a feminine version of myself, with an even more delicate and gentle aura than usual.

It must be the makeup that worked wonders, but I also felt a significant part of it was thanks to shedding the weight I had been carrying on my shoulders.

Right, I am me, even if I am not acknowledged by someone. Anastasia Valentine.

While evaluating who I am may depend on others, deciding whether or not I’ve become someone fitting that name is entirely up to me, isn’t it?

Even if I’m an oddity born from a research laboratory through chance and miracle, there’s no need for any permission to exist.

Especially since I, alongside Zero, worked quite hard to seize my freedom, right? To think I nearly faced an existential crisis over the mere few who stood against us recently.

Everyone should consider themselves fortunate. If this Anastasia decided to really get serious and throw a fit… nobody would have come out unscathed.

“…Thank you for going out of your way to care. It was really helpful.”

Thanks to that, I felt truly refreshed.

It could even be said that the burdens I’d been carrying over the past few days felt rather empty now.

So what’s the conclusion?

To just keep going on my own path, regardless of the fools that interrupted, stepped in front, or nagged.

Don’t be overly afraid and start worrying about insignificant things before trying to do something properly.

If I don’t take action, nothing will change anyway.

…Hmm. In truth, what Erin emphasized was closer to “just go with what you feel like!”

However, if I really followed such guidance, her script for what she was supposed to read live would soon turn much more interesting… I’ll strive for the peace of the city. Yes.

“Oh my, not at all! I had so much fun getting to pamper such a beautiful model like you…!”

“…Oh, I see. I can tell just how comfortably you think of me, Bethany.”

They took my greeting as nothing more than simple advice and makeup assistance from a senior, and with that, they milled about and got ready to leave.

The manager wasn’t moving on her own; she was dragged away, still clutching her ears with a whimper… Anyway.

It seems like they’re confident they’ll meet me again, whether soon or later, since we work in the same broadcasting station, waving goodbye lightly. Hmm… It’s a bit disappointing for me, knowing the reality is completely different.

They were much more interesting than I expected, but since I plan to properly unleash a virus and then not return to this place on purpose…

Hmm…

“…I feel like I owe a debt of gratitude. If you ever need assistance with financial issues or software-related matters, please don’t hesitate to contact me at this number.”

“Ha?! Why are you suddenly talking like a businessperson? If you want to help, don’t go spreading rumors behind my back about Erin Skully going around other people’s waiting rooms for a hairstyle, little lady.”

Considering it’s a somewhat rare contact number held by less than ten people…

As I grabbed the hand of the person leaving, she received my cyberware-sent number and merely responded pleasantly, as if she heard a fun joke.

It was a bit unexpected. No, really, if it’s about those two issues, if I can’t help, no one else in the world will. I’m doing this out of gratitude, so just remember it somewhere in the back of your mind!

But the timing was oddly coincidental. Just as the two were leaving for recording, I had two guides come and meet me as well.

“…Oh?”

“Eh.”

The women who had stormed in and out raised their voices in surprise.

When the waiting room door opened, a neatly bearded man with square glasses, showing off a robust figure, appeared—an archetypal Irish-American named Pete Morgan, the News Director.

To put it simply, he was a grim reaper of sorts for the announcer and her manager. But Director Morgan prioritized welcoming me, as the star he should cherish was not immediately in sight.

I don’t know why, though… No, maybe I do a bit.

“Ahem! Miss Anastasia, it’s been a while! I contacted you abruptly after a month, and I was worried if I may have displeased the future Lady of the Amagi family with such trivial matters! How was your journey here?”

Honestly, this guy has started again despite having denied it multiple times.

Hey, stop imagining this couple in your head! I just got called to shoot an advertisement!

“…I’m cleanly retired now, so I have no ties with Enema anymore, you know?”

“Well… I heard there were reports that you were too shy to say that publicly. Anyway, we’ll talk more about that later. I believe you had a brief conversation with our staff, but I trust that no mistakes were made?”

At that moment, Morgan’s gaze shifted towards the two standing awkwardly, late for their greetings.

It wasn’t that I genuinely believed something was wrong; it was more of a safety check with eye contact, but… the exchange of glances quickly heightened in intensity.

Erin frowned first. She looked at the director, then back at me, and soon released a deep sigh, as if she understood.

Manager Bethany checked my hands with hers, once… twice… three times. Then her eyes lost focus, and for about five seconds, she began shaking like a tremor.

“Gah.”

…Ah, the manager fainted while standing. Oh dear.