Chapter 223

Dying… what is death?

Somewhere, it was fancily wrapped as the “Cradle for all things,” or “The debt that all men pay.” …Sounds plausible.

Ah, I’m not trying to suddenly lay out the brain fantasies I’ve been blankly imagining or to forcefully spout some nonsense philosophy, you know?

Of course, I cannot compare myself to the great philosophers of the past.

It’s just that for me, the topic makes it impossible to keep my mouth shut as it fills me with so much agony… so I thought I would ramble a bit. Yes.

I’ve come close to dying many times. Even though I don’t remember it, the fact that I have already died and come back to life adds a lot of irony and upheaval to my existence.

…When I was young, I certainly didn’t think that people would walk into life-and-death crises on purpose, but it seems life, my friend, isn’t the type that easily hands things over.

Anyway, back in the day, when I first started living under this world’s broken sky…

Our patriarch from the Valentine family, who acted gruff but would still take care of me.

When I was indebted at Grandfather Heinrich’s shop, I once hoped that if I woke up one day, I would see the ceiling of my own apartment again.

Since realizing that nothing changes if I don’t take action, I imagined things like if I suddenly died, a message saying “Clear Failure!” would pop up, or that some transcendental being would show up and look at me scornfully, asking if I couldn’t survive… those funny scenarios I envisioned.

But the most significant turning point in solidifying my latest stance was really learning about the origin story of that “me.” Or should I say, I believe it had a huge impact?

I know it’s bad to overuse speculative expressions! But I would appreciate it if you could understand my state where self-objectification is tough to rank on Earth. Ahem.

In any case, it was genuinely nice that all the coincidences and necessities, choices and decisions piled up and helped me establish my own home… but I never imagined I’d slide down like this in one shot.

Even though I’ve experienced it myself, I still don’t know where the natural flow ends and where the runaway derailment begins. I just ended up like this, so I thought I’d roll with it~.

“Hmm….”

But… questions breed more questions, so what does “this situation” even mean?

I need to clarify this point before explaining. I have no memories of that near-death experience or anyone’s particular communion that would leave everyone curious.

Of course, that doesn’t mean I wanted to fervently deny the concept of an impressive afterlife or the existence of the soul, which is hard to explain scientifically.

Considering parallel universes exist, it probably wouldn’t be that strange for a person to move to a separate dimension.

So even if the space waiting for everyone beyond death is a world customized to fit individuals, it shouldn’t be viewed as overwhelmingly weird.

Even looking at it from all angles, no matter how many times I re-examine it, I couldn’t easily shake the feeling of stepping into a strange land due to making a bad choice at an important crossroad.

“…If you’re awake, hurry up and wash up and eat. How can an aspiring engineer be so lazy in the mornings…!”

“Uh… y-yes??”

Why on earth do I see the uneven ceiling of a workshop instead of the ceiling of my apartment…? As I pondered this, Grandfather Heinrich, who poked his head through the door, couldn’t help but unload a nagging complaint before quickly disappearing, busy with something.

No, sure, I answered, but there were quite a few questions mixed into that response… Excuse me? Grandfather?

– Did you cough? If you don’t have a specific menu in mind, I will prepare something based on nutritional balance. –

“…I see…?”

I thought to rise from the bed, realizing that I shouldn’t be lingering there aimlessly and should figure out what was going on.

This time, Zero with an apron and a makeshift dirty-proof outfit made of shabby scraps of cloth zipped past me like the wind.

…Indeed, I was stumped and moved awkwardly, caught off guard.

For now, I excluded Time Leap (time travel) from the possibilities as a relatively ordinary case among many. Though I had no intention of belittling it, under normal conditions, he would be in a rather inconvenient state – a tin can, after all.

For some reason, the clothes were neatly organized in the closet.

Due to the rapid evacuation that resulted from property seizure at the previous Harvest Planet, I had to discard many things. I quickly threw on the ill-fated indoor clothing I shopped for with Helena and dashed into the living room.

Even calling it the living room of the Orthodox Repair Shop, it’s basically an open space structurally mixed with a break area, kitchen, and piles of spare parts.

With plenty of living obstacles, my field of view was quite limited, but ultimately, it was an open design where the entrance to the shop was clearly visible… a typical settlement hole-in-the-wall? I wanted to describe it as a warm and vibrant landscape, although I might end up sparking some controversy.

Every time the door opened, the stifling desert air rushed in, not that it was inescapable!

– Breakfast is ready, Ahsa. Enjoy your meal. –

“Uh… thanks.”

As I took my seat, a tidy plate filled with food was promptly set before me.

It was golden, glossy corn kernels that looked freshly taken from a can, long strips of artificial bacon still sizzling, a fried egg shining with a sunny-side-up grandeur, mashed boiled potatoes, and a drink that resembled milk…

This neighborhood’s breakfast had never come out so beautifully. Has the cook changed? Or maybe the household finances have improved positively.

“Hmm? Why is this tin can still here when it’s way past time to go help out at the pub? What are you waiting to hear from Schneider?”

– I believe the importance of providing the needed meal to Madame Anastasia outweighs my agreement to provide extra labor, so I’m perfectly fine. –

“…Anastasia! If you get a moment today, make sure to check this fool’s head! I have no idea what’s broken to make him like this!”

“Since it was like that from the start, I can’t fix it…”

Even with such a harsh tone, Grandfather gently patted Zero’s back as they left for work.

While I murmured about that peculiar scene, I sliced a corner of the egg white with my fork and put it in my mouth. …Salty and savory. The texture and taste were terrifyingly identical to what he had made for me before.

However, despite everything seeming real, there was an unbearable sense of discomfort that intermittently surged within me, insisting that I needed to grasp the situation quickly.

It felt too realistic to dismiss it as a simple dream, and too familiar to classify it as a mere delusion, as I saw familiar objects stacked in just the right places. What on earth is this scene?

Why show me this now? Furthermore, not merely as a passive observer but as an active participant.

“Hmm…”

I glanced at Grandfather, who was rifling through the display case while sitting at the counter.

When it comes to living or dying, whether being shot or chased by someone, I didn’t have to worry about any of those dangerous matters. Truly… it seemed like a peaceful scene. Without grand desires or worries, it should be perfectly fine to live on, doing trivial tasks like this. So what was I in such a rush for?

…Why do I keep getting these silly thoughts that maybe just being like this is alright?

I know my personality too well to relax until I figure out what this jumbled illusion is about. It’s not like my mental faculties have gone entirely astray… wait, an illusion? Why did I just confidently assume it was all an illusion again??

I had calmly pondered that upon gaining awareness, this world might be a uniquely peculiar afterlife…

“Ah, if it’s Lena, she left early. She said she wouldn’t wake you if you were still sleeping.”

“Huh… is that so…?”

As my gaze fell, a glimmer of recognition seemed to dawn on Grandfather Heinrich, who provided kind explanations, but to me, whose trust had quickly begun to waver, it didn’t resonate as strikingly.

So Helena, who should have already gained independence, is living here too? She couldn’t even obtain qualifications without residing in Metropolis for police work or mercenary tasks. What kind of job would suit her personality, which enjoys physical work?

And what about the room? Back when I was indebted, I had stayed in the room Helena used, which didn’t have much extra space… could it be that they share a bed?

More than that, I grew curious about what time frame this awkward setting game was set to allow for such a favorable narrative development. Since earlier, every time I tried to look at the Cyberware calendar, the screen started to blur… pretty funny.

Since I modified the software held within the Cyberware implants into an independent firmware, it never malfunctioned. Did they think I would just brush it off, assuming it’s in bad shape?

I wish they would stop trying such clumsy tricks. It’s not common to be as skilled in Imagery control as I am.

…Swallow. And thud!

To quell the severe hunger that would surely torment me upon waking,

I swallowed the last piece of bacon left on the plate with regret, then stomped my foot strongly to the floor.

It shook. Waves surged.

Like the animation effect of a carpet rippling from an old Western cartoon. The rippling that began from the ground quickly spread to the objects, up the walls, and toward the ceiling.

Even Grandfather, who had been vivaciously moving just a moment ago, the smell of food that tickled my nose, and even the fork comfortably held between my fingers were all heaved and scattered as if the surface of a pond where pebbles had been thrown. Hmm… I’m really sorry. When I get back home, I’ll definitely make sure to call first to check in…!

“Ahsa? What’s wrong? Did you have a bad dream?”

From the iron frame that supported the repair shop to the tiny grains of sand blown in through the door that Zero opened on their way out,

everything crumbled like a mirage, when suddenly silvery hair brilliance like moonlight veiled my sight, seizing my attention.

As it swallowed my surroundings back into the void, it drew on a soft voice that seemed to cling with a desperate yearning for recognition, trying to capture me.

“…Puff!!”

When I raised my head, I found a bizarre creature trying to recreate Helena’s bright smile I last saw.

Its face, pixelated and glitching like a distorted screen exposed to severe signal interference.

“…My dear little sister? Why are you so sharply angry?”

“Because my sister wouldn’t use such a grotesque tone, and I have no memories of living so leisurely, so could we stop pretending?”

Despite embodying an appearance that wouldn’t be out of place in a nightmare, she still had the nerve to keep up this charade.

I slapped the hand reaching towards my cheek away. The closer it got to me, the more the noise phenomenon intensified, making it hard to see. I felt no softness or elasticity in her skin at all.

It was almost to the point where I desperately wanted to interrogate her about whether she had tried pre-investigation!

After all, they dramatically parted ways with me, it was revealed that they moved to Neo Haven and even partially partnered with Paradise! If this got out, I had no idea what would be said, and yet she doesn’t understand my circumstances, lying about staying at Harvest Planet all this time.

“……”

The absurd patchwork finally seemed to reach its limits, as her grotesque face twisted further.

A brief silence passed, and I could barely hear a sigh float by.

“Haah… Our darling has to be seen as having a strong self-awareness. I can’t tell if I should say that kid’s sprouting yellow shoots already…?”

With a rather sinister tone, her face crumbled like mud.