Chapter 200

What story should I bring up?

How should I treat her?

A victim who lost her body because of me.

A monster who has slaughtered countless people.

The strongest among those I can rely on.

Yet, a beast that should never be set free.

Someone who holds a grudge against me… and a companion I must live with.

All of that combined to form the person known as Hersela.

I needed Hersela, yet I felt uneasy.

But as long as I couldn’t reject her forever… I would have to understand and accept her somehow.

“…Why did you do something so cruel?”

But after much deliberation, what came out of my mouth was an impulsive accusation.

The tragedy that took place in the Prince’s Palace garden.

I wanted to know the reason behind such actions, what thoughts drove her to do it.

[Is that all you have to say to me? How pathetic.]

Hersela’s voice was laced with contempt and mockery.

“That’s…”

[Fine. If you’re so curious, I’ll answer. Why did I do it? Because it was necessary, of course. All because of you, flinching like a coward and getting yourself killed.]

“Necessary? That kind of thing? Because of me?”

[Yes. Did you think I enjoyed human flesh? But because you handed your body over to the Ghost Sword, if I hadn’t done that, there would’ve been no chance of winning. If I had lost, would you be breathing so carefreely now?]

……

I had no retort.

If she had lost… by the time I woke up, my life would’ve been over, with only my breath left.

In that sense, she was practically my life’s savior. Even if it was something she had to do because we’re bound by fate.

[So don’t you dare question me over such trivial matters. It’s all because you’re weak. You took someone else’s body, yet you don’t even know how to use it properly, just ruining it. Let me tell you, watching you fight makes me want to die of frustration.]

“…Was I that bad? I thought I’ve been doing pretty well so far…”

Well, the strange techniques Hersela showed that day were things I couldn’t even imagine.

I had no idea Life Force could be wielded like that.

Still, I’ve been fighting hard, and I’d say my track record was decent…

[Shut up. I’m about to explode with frustration.]

Apparently, Hersela didn’t think so.

A surge of irritation and anger flooded my mind.

[It’s good that you recognized your lack of skill and devoted yourself to swordsmanship. Defeating a great warrior by awakening your Life Force wasn’t bad either. But in the end, those are just the foundations you’ve barely built on an empty field. Do you even know what the source of your strength, the power that’s kept you alive, truly is?]

…Life Force.

The sinister power that grows stronger by slaughtering innocent people.

That was an undeniable fact.

[The fastest path to strength is right in front of you, yet why do you turn away from it? Foolishly, why do you insist on taking the long way when a shortcut is right there? Are you afraid of human blood but not the blood of beastmen and monsters?]

Hersela spat out harsh sarcasm.

[No, that can’t be it. You’re not some rookie who’s never killed before. In that burning village, didn’t you enjoy it too? I quite liked you back then.]

That was because they were evil.

Criminals who needed to be erased. It was completely different from killing innocent people.

“So you want me to slaughter thousands of innocent people like you? And end up going mad and dying in the end?”

Unacceptable advice.

I know all too well where the path Hersela suggests leads.

[Is that priestess’s words bothering you? The foolish words of a woman filled with blind contradictions? A true warrior must distance themselves from sorcery and superstition.]

“…I’m not a warrior of Ka`har. I’m a knight of the Empire.”

[You talk so smoothly. Yet you’re not even loyal to the Empire. And for the record, I haven’t personally killed thousands either. Who has the time to kill that many one by one?]

What are you talking about?

Before being called the Beastman Devourer, the most famous title for me was the slaughterer who killed thousands.

“Every time I see the Life Force you’ve accumulated, everyone says that.”

[That’s a misconception. Others need that much blood to accumulate Life Force at this level. I’m different. The number I’ve personally killed… probably doesn’t exceed a thousand.]

“…A thousand or thousands. What’s the difference?”

Is a terrorist who kills five people twice as good as one who kills ten?

In essence, there’s no difference at all.

[The efficiency is different. Can’t you even grasp that? While others kill ten, I only need to kill two to accumulate the same power. So, where else can you find a faster way to grow stronger?]

Huh?

Efficiency.

The fact that she had been slaughtering people could be explained by just those two words.

Like an athlete searching for a better diet, she had calmly committed massacres.

Feeling a shuddering sense of alienation, I unconsciously clenched my fists and trembled.

“Just for efficiency, you do something like that…?”

[Do you think it’s wrong? How am I any different from you? Humans slaughter livestock and turn their blood and flesh into sustenance. The Empire’s knights slaughter monsters and beastmen to grow stronger. You’ve done the same. So tell me, how are they any different from me?]

“You think you can justify what you’ve done with that kind of sophistry? Monsters and beastmen are enemies that attack people! We don’t kill them to grow stronger; we grow stronger by stopping them!”

I couldn’t stop the anger and passion from seeping into my voice. Thankfully, it wasn’t loud enough to echo outside the ward.

The more I talked to her, the more disgust I felt.

[They attack me just the same, you know? Even if I don’t strike first. The Westerners may be innocent to you, but not to me.]

“That’s because you’re a slaughterer! You’ve been plundering and butchering defenseless people one-sidedly. How can you even compare yourself to us?”

It was like a pleasure-seeking serial killer sneering at a soldier, saying we’re all the same kind of murderer.

Of course, there’s a gap as wide as the gallows and a parade ground between them.

[Do you spare monsters weaker than you? Did the priestess show mercy to the beastman cub?]

“……”

Her way of thinking was just different from mine.

To the point where I wondered if it was even possible for me to understand her.

What’s the point of preaching human morality to someone who doesn’t even distinguish between humans and monsters?

[You can’t answer, can you? That’s because you have no rebuttal. The difference between you and us isn’t that great, after all. Hmm, I see. So this is what it feels like to win an argument. It’s quite amusing.]

Hersela lightly smirked, taking my silence as surrender.

I didn’t even feel like arguing back.

“…Let me ask you two last things. Is that okay?”

[Go ahead. You’re still nothing but a thieving murderer to me, but our conversation has been somewhat entertaining. I’ll grant you this special mercy.]

Her tone was almost boastful.

“What does a human life mean to you?”

[Food.]

At this point, I gave up on any emotional connection with her.

She was more like a carnivorous animal than a human.

“Why did you want to grow stronger so quickly, even if it meant going that far?”

[Revenge.]

…Revenge?

Surprisingly, it was a far more human motive than I expected.

Which is to say, it didn’t suit her at all.

“You don’t even see people as people, so whose revenge are you even talking about?”

Hersela fell silent for a moment, then reluctantly dodged the question.

[…That’s none of your business. I’ve already answered your two questions, so that’s enough.]

It seemed she had no intention of telling me.

Even without an answer, I could roughly guess.

Who else could this woman have sworn revenge for, if not her own mother?

It was obvious just from the fact that she carried her mother’s broken sword, which she couldn’t even infuse with Life Force, until it shattered.

[On the contrary, let me ask you—who exactly are you? Judging by your words, you’re not from Ka`har. Are you an Imperial sorcerer?]

A sorcerer? Please.

“…I was just a soldier. But when I woke up, I found myself in someone else’s body.”

There was no need to explain in detail.

Even if I did, she wouldn’t understand or believe me.

[A soldier, huh? Considering you didn’t even know how to wield a sword, you must’ve been a low-ranking grunt. How foolish. To try being a soldier, not even a knight, in a woman’s body that doesn’t know swordsmanship. You won’t see a good end like that.]

Did she think I was a woman…?

I debated whether to correct her misconception… but ultimately decided against it.

If she found out that the person who had been controlling her body for half a year was actually a man, she might fly into a rage out of shame.

Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if she was capable of such emotions.