Chapter 20

Early morning.

It wasn’t exactly pleasant to be dragged out with my hair still a mess, wrapped in chains.

Even though I was willing to walk on my own, I don’t know why they were in such a hurry.

“A warm bowl of soup would suffice for breakfast.”

“What kind of meal for someone about to be executed!”

“Isn’t it strange to execute someone without a proper trial?”

“Do you think we care about that? We just do as we’re told!”

“…Right. That’s what soldiers do, I suppose. Even if it’s not ideal.”

I didn’t express any further complaints after that.

I knew any conversation would be pointless once I understood what they stood for.

“Finally here.”

Following them, I arrived at what looked like a training ground.

And there, the person in charge of this training ground and the soldiers who dragged me here greeted me with an annoyed face.

“Welcome, you treacherous scoundrel!”

It had been a while since I was called a traitor.

The last time I heard that was when I stained the Imperial Palace with blood to kill the Crown Prince and the Second Prince.

“I never had any plans to assassinate His Majesty the Emperor.”

“How dare you use violence against an Imperial officer! It’s only natural to charge you with treason!”

“That’s an interesting perspective. By the way, what’s your name?”

“Neil Pihen… Wait, why are you asking as if you’re in charge?!!”

If he was from the Pihen family, I could somewhat understand.

“Ah, a branch of the Duke’s family. Even a fool who can barely count his age could become an officer.”

“You really are insane! Do you even know how disrespectful your words are…!”

As one question was answered, many more connected to it surfaced.

“By the way, to be in charge of a fortress, you’d need experience and achievements. How old are you?”

“21! Now that you’ve got your answer, it’s your turn to answer me!”

“You’re young. To hand command to a rookie officer… Even if the Minister of War is a dog, he wouldn’t favor someone like you.”

“Ah, damn it… Hey, get me some cold water… I think I’m about to lose it.”

“Even so, you don’t seem to have any exceptional talent. Hmm… Even if the military is short on talent, they wouldn’t employ someone as inexperienced as you.”

“Whew…”

He started gulping down the cold water the soldiers brought. He drank so hastily that half of it seemed to spill out.

“Yeah, I’m an idiot for trying to talk to a madman.”

“No matter how self-aware you are, you don’t seem capable of managing a fortress… This is really strange.”

Then, as if telling me to shut up, he kicked me in the face.

It didn’t hurt much, but my dry lip split slightly, and a small amount of blood trickled out.

“Hey, talking to this guy is insane. Let’s just finish this and cut his head off.”

Then, someone who seemed like his adjutant adjusted his glasses and began reading some kind of document.

“Criminal Raul Muska! Despite being an exiled criminal, instead of atoning for your sins, you have committed the grave crime of insulting Imperial Officer Neil Pihen!”

“I only used force to defend myself. Though I might bear some responsibility for him wetting his pants.”

“Furthermore, as a representative of the village, you should set an example, yet you have been lecherously harassing the village women!”

“That’s a harsh accusation. I may not be perfect, but I pride myself on being clean in my relationships with women.”

“These charges are a deception to the Imperial family! Therefore, this is considered treason, and you are sentenced to death!”

Even though I’m not well-versed in law, I knew this judgment was a mess.

That adjutant probably hadn’t studied law either.

Right. This is just a list of sentences that sound plausible by his standards.

“…The content is somewhat naive.”

“What?”

“I mean, my crimes are not so trivial.”

The crimes I committed were not merely using violence against such a group.

If my crimes were only that, I wouldn’t be in this situation.

“The crimes I should be punished for are as follows.”

“Hey, what’s this guy saying…?”

“The crime of slaughtering the giants who betrayed the allied forces and caused great damage to the Empire. The crime of assassinating their king and burning their land as an example. The crime of not regretting any of it.”

Even if it was by command, it was still a crime I committed.

“The crime of massacring the dragon race, who were enemies of the allied forces. The crime of destroying their sacred grounds. The crime of still believing those actions were justified.”

Even though I suffered an unforgettable disgrace, it was still a crime I committed.

“The crime of assassinating the foolish Crown Prince, who started a war due to his lust, and the Second Prince, who resembled his father.”

The Second Prince’s words about my younger sister were the trigger, but it was still a clear crime.

“The crime of being born as my mother’s son. The crime of being born as my younger sister’s older brother. The crime of being my fiancée’s fiancé.”

“Hey, what’s this crazy guy talking about…! Is he really…?”

“The crime of killing with my own hands the savior of my life and the friend who could share my soul.”

And that was the greatest crime I committed.

Compared to those, killing giants and dragons and assassinating the Crown Prince were trivial.

“Those are the crimes I have committed.”

“Hey, how crazy is this guy…?”

They were slowly backing away, looking at me as if I were a monster.

The trembling bodies, unstable pupils, and irregular heartbeats of those who have seen something grotesque. This too was one of the ‘familiarities’ that no longer stirred any emotion in me.

Being treated as a thorn in the side, a traitor, trash, a ruffian, or a monster no longer provided any new stimulation.

The ‘familiarity’ deeply rooted in my heart blocked everything.

But its branches had grown so large that they even blocked the sky I looked up to.

“Hey, kill him quickly… No, execute him now!”

“If only I were like you.”

“What…?”

“If I were too weak to kill anything, too foolish to betray my sister, too selfish to shift the blame.”

If only I could have been such a person.

“If only… I…”

I hate the word ‘if.’

I know better than anyone how futile the fantasies that come with that word are.

But that sweet fantasy is like a drug, impossible to quit.

“Even someone as lacking as me could have been loved.”

Selfishly, I only thought of that one outcome, ignoring the other consequences that ‘if’ might bring.

“If you can kill me, do it now. It seems it no longer matters what crime I die for.”

“Hey, kill him! This guy is completely insane!!!”

But the soldiers following him seemed too scared, trembling and not stepping forward.

“These useless bastards…! Move, I’ll do it myself!”

He grabbed a subordinate’s sword and slowly approached.

He stepped on the hard ground as if crossing a stone bridge, with unstable and cautious steps.

“Crazy bastard…”

As he raised his sword, a bright blue light filled the sky and ground.

Everyone closed their eyes against the bright light, but I stared straight at the blue light.

Then, a thunderous sound shook the fortress.

“Found you, you half-dead bastard.”

A woman descended with the lightning, the source of the light and sound.

“What? Do I like women? With your perception, it’s not a wall but a fortress you’ve built. Should I turn you into a real woman?”

The woman standing on the blackened ground had a beautiful face.

Her sky-blue hair fluttered wildly, revealing sparkling blue eyes.

Her face resembled a beautiful bird from mythology.

Her body was like a statue modeled after the goddess who owned that bird.

The owner of all these blessings and one of the five heroes, she was also my friend.

“Camilla.”

She, who killed the monstrous bird even I couldn’t, was an exceptional warrior and hunter.

So, I thought she’d easily track me down.

“You changed your makeup. And your perfume.”

“Ugh…”

“Personally, I preferred your previous perfume.”

“…You’re clueless about everything else, but you notice this like a ghost.”

“Other women might be different, but when it comes to you, it’s easy to tell.”

“Cowardly bastard…”

She turned her head to gaze at the distant mountains.

After a moment, she turned back to me and erupted like a volcano.

“That’s why I said to use that perception a bit more broadly. If you had, we wouldn’t be in this mess…”

She suddenly stopped and stared at my lips.

Probably because of the blood that had trickled from the slight tear inside my lip.

“Who did this?”

Camilla’s voice turned as cold as it did on the battlefield.