Chapter 180

Erica, who suddenly got hit with the harsh reality from Kara, just walked away.

She didn’t scream, didn’t throw a tantrum, and even managed not to cry.

She only wore a face that looked like she was in shock. I guess the bluntness of being called selfish hit pretty hard.

‘For now, I told her to go to Rize just in case…’

I had never seen that expression on Erica even in the Soul World.

In the Soul World, it was more like she was on the verge of ‘awakening,’ but nothing like this reaction, as if she had just been whacked by a hammer.

And that got me worried. What if Erica just up and left the Academy forever or ended up in a bad situation?

I never planned to recruit her, but now I felt a bit guilty for being too harsh.

Of course, it wasn’t me; it was Luna and Kara who were the ones saying those words. Especially Luna, who escalated it without a hint of malice.

“Um… maybe I was a bit too harsh? You know, when I see someone like that, I get frustrated,” Kara said.

“It’ll be fine. Once she meets the Saint, her worries will probably clear up,” Luna replied.

Kara looked a bit awkward at that, and Luna continued.

As I mentioned earlier, I told Erica to meet Rize just in case. Considering she’s a Saint, meeting her would be difficult. But since I told her to use my name, she’d likely have a high chance of meeting her.

For Rize, is she another manifestation of the Chaos deity? She would probably accept it quite readily. The likelihood is really high.

She might even ask if just mentioning my name would be enough. After all, I also considered various circumstances before making this choice.

‘People still don’t know what kind of relationship Rize and I have.’

If someone were to ask me about it, I could only say this: I don’t know.

Chaos is the only connection, but paradoxically, that’s why it should work.

‘She’ll probably take good care of it.’

There’s an event in the Soul World where Erica consults with Rize.

To fulfill that, rather tricky conditions are needed, but most of them are already met.

First off, being a follower of the Chaos deity gives me a significant edge. If I hadn’t been, forming a connection would have been much harder.

“If it’s the Saint, it should be alright. If that doesn’t work out, then we’re really out of luck,” I said.

“Maybe she’ll notice something from what you said and change?” Kara added.

“I really hope so. I have no idea why, but it feels like I’ll be getting tangled up with that girl a lot,” I sighed.

I really hope that’s not the case. I’m not in a position to deal with Erica.

I wish she’d mature mentally, but that’s a matter for the future. Thankfully, we’re in different classes for now.

Of course, after the Academy collapses, the chances of being in the same class shoot up sharply. There’s nothing I can do about that.

For now, I just need to focus on my own tasks. Having finished my meal, we headed back to Rod.

“Oh, perfect timing. Can you lend me a hand?”

“What’s going on now?”

As soon as we returned, we were greeted by a bizarre sight.

Rod was deeply engrossed in some tools spread across the floor, looking extremely concerned about something.

Rod responded to Luna’s question while rummaging through the tools, including a hammer.

“It’s hard to get rid of all this wood. But if I just leave it here, they’ll rot away, which is a problem. So since I was bored, I was thinking of making something.”

“A statue, perhaps?”

“Feel free to do as you wish. Sculpting is excellent for mental stability, dexterity, and finally, visualizing an idea.”

The idea of doing whatever with precisely cut wood. Hearing that made me look at the wood.

Since it’s come to this, making a food storage area for Porori and sculpting wouldn’t be a bad idea.

Until now, there hadn’t been a good place for my impressive dexterity to be put to use, so it’s nice to have a hobby like this.

“I’ll do it. I want to sculpt.”

“Oh, right! Didn’t you also play around with sculpting during the final exam?”

I nodded at Kara’s comment but flinched. I seem to recall that instance created some embarrassing memories.

Cautiously turning my gaze, I caught sight of Kara with a mysterious smile on her face. Apparently, she was remembering that incident too. I tried to hide my reddening face as much as possible.

“Want me to play some music? That could help with focus.”

“….”

My face was getting hotter by the second. She was definitely doing this on purpose.

I tried to ignore it, but hiding my blushing cheeks was impossible.

Did Kara notice my change? She snickered and cracked a joke.

“Sivar’s face is all red too. It really stands out since you have such fair skin.”

“Whoa? Seriously? What were you thinking?”

“…uh, nothing.”

Anyway, nothing at all. I timidly denied it and finished preparing for the work. Kara didn’t tease me further.

Finally, I started a simple sculpture with the dagger, hammer, and various tools Rod handed me.

‘What should I make first? Hmm…’

I had made a model of Kara during the finals. But honestly, it’d be embarrassing to sculpt it now.

I kept pondering, glancing around. People seemed to be focusing their eyes on me.

For some reason, they seemed to expect a lot from me, which felt a bit burdensome.

‘Oh. Should I make that guy?’

The one who wielded the greatsword of blood. I didn’t even know the dude’s name.

But I still vividly remembered his appearance. I felt good about it and began to carve.

Tap-tap—

The quiet sound of carving echoed. It was so quiet I could hear the dagger cutting through the wood.

That meant everyone was focusing on me. I tightened my concentration and didn’t make any mistakes.

About 30 minutes passed, and I was finished sculpting the demon I had encountered before.

“Wow. This is amazing! Who is this?”

“It’s a demon. The one I met before.”

“So, this is how he looks?”

Starting with Luna, everyone began to shower me with praise. I felt a bit proud and shrugged my shoulders.

“Could you maybe sculpt me too?”

“Me too! I want to be in my dancer outfit!”

“Me too! Me too!”

“…”

I feel like my work has unexpectedly multiplied.

“Hey, buddy. Can you make one for me too? If you do, I’ll forgive you for breaking my acorn storage.”

What are you?

*****

Erica firmly believed her mindset was absolutely correct.

Cherishing life—what on earth could possibly be wrong with that?

Moreover, she wasn’t just spouting empty words; she was practicing what she preached. She was strictly vegetarian, avoiding meat entirely.

What little veggies she did consume were mostly directly sourced from nature. She even prayed to Gaia while gathering them.

‘Me, selfish…?!’

But now her conviction felt like it had shattered completely.

To be precise, it felt like her self-belief had vanished. The concept wasn’t the problem, but the individual spreading it was.

Starting from Luna’s dizzying chatter to Kara’s merciless verbal smackdowns.

The mental shock was so severe it made her ironclad heart quiver. Both repeatedly mentioned that the concept itself wasn’t the issue.

‘How should I…’

For sure, Kara’s remark that she was being selfish struck like a dagger. As a follower of Gaia, that was practically an insult.

However, she couldn’t refute it. Deep down, she wanted to lash out, but it was all true.

Though late to the game, a retort crossed her mind, but it was already too late. She had arrived in Byzantium, almost in a trance, at Sivar’s suggestion.

After arriving in Byzantium, she was instructed by Sivar to meet Rize. Word had it that she just had to use her name.

‘Will she actually meet me? But how is Sivar related to the Saint?’

Rumor has it that Sivar is also a follower of Chaos, but she wasn’t sure about that. What mattered right now didn’t involve that.

Thus, Erica decided to seek Rize once she arrived at the Papal Palace. Rize is the most esteemed figure in Byzantium.

You’d think it would be tough for an ordinary believer like Erica to meet her, but surprisingly, it wasn’t hard at all.

The fact that she’s so high in status means nobody dares to treat her casually, which is unique.

Thanks to that uniqueness, Rize also had ample personal time. If you only had a bit of courage, you could meet her.

Clang!

“Haha! Try to catch me!”

“Eeek?!”

And just as Erica arrived at the Papal Palace, she witnessed a bizarre scene unfold.

A pretty dapper dude was sprinting and busting through a window!

To make it even weirder, a massive guy charged in behind him, ready to crush him. Already an utterly chaotic scene.

“Damn it! Let go! I said let go!!”

“It’s not training time yet, Your Holiness.”

“You punk!!!”

“…?”

What on earth was happening here? For Erica, who was visiting the Papal Palace for the first time, it was utterly bewildering.

Meanwhile, the attendant who subdued the Pope, Gaspard, noticed Erica. He was still hoisting the Pope like a sack of potatoes as he spoke.

“Looks like we have a newcomer. What brings you here?”

“Um… I was looking to meet the Saint…”

“The Saint?”

“Yes, Sivar said I just need to mention my name…”

“Oh! You’re one of Brother Sivar’s friends!”

The moment Erica mentioned Sivar’s name, Gaspard’s face lit up.

Being muscular, he exuded an inexplicable aura of intimidation.

“The Saint should be in her personal room right now. I’ll guide you.”

“T-Thank you…”

“By the way! Are you a follower of Gaia? I can sense that from your energy!”

As Erica was quietly following the attendant, who was nearly dragging the Pope along, he suddenly exclaimed.

She flinched for a moment but then quietly nodded. So she really wouldn’t deny being a follower of Gaia.

“Run away immediately! Get away from these maniacs…!”

*Thwack!*

“Ugh!”

The Pope, who seemed about to shout something, went limp thanks to Gaspard’s swift chop to the neck.

In the midst of all this chaotic development, Erica couldn’t even ascertain the situation properly. Should she escape or what? That thought didn’t even cross her mind.

The only one who smiled warmly at her was Gaspard, who casually addressed her.

“Don’t worry. The Holy Father is just being a drama queen.”

“Ah, um… okay…”

Is this really how things are? She couldn’t help but think that in her mind.

But seeing the calmness inside the Papal Palace and the country still running smoothly made it feel almost ‘normal.’

There was no way he could just carry the Pope around like a sack and then slap him without it being a complete madman’s act.

Erica believed that wholeheartedly.

Knock knock knock—

“Saint! There’s a believer who wishes to meet you. It seems Brother Sivar recommended them.”

[Come in.]

Before long, they reached Rize’s personal room. The moment she heard the invite to enter, Erica tensed up.

We’re talking about a Saint here. Alongside the rumors of her eccentricity, she was famous for being Gwonseong, the most prestigious figure in Byzantium.

Moreover, despite her appearance, she had lived longer than most. So it might just solidify her beliefs even further.

“Well then, have a good day.”

“Y-Yes! May Gaia bless you.”

“Ugh… No, I need to escape…”

It seemed the Pope was starting to regain consciousness. Regardless, Gaspard took him away as is.

Erica stood there, dumbfounded as she watched their figures fade away before slowly opening the door and stepping inside.

As soon as the door opened, the sight that greeted her was the Saintly figure of Rize. Erica’s gaze fell from Rize’s face down to her form.

As a fellow woman, Rize’s body radiated an intimidating beauty. But being a Saint, she also emanated an aura of reverence.

“Welcome. I hear you came on Brother Sivar’s recommendation?”

“Yes, yes…!”

“Please, take a seat.”

As Erica barely managed to suppress her pounding heart, she sat down.

In the moment, she didn’t even register the part about Sivar’s recommendation. This was Rize in front of her, making her emotions cloud any logical thought.

Now face-to-face with Rize, Erica began to stiffen up, starting to gauge the room cautiously.

It was tough to even meet Rize’s eye, her palms became slick with sweat.

“So, what brings you here? You seem to be troubled by something.”

“Uh… how did you know that…?”

“It’s clearly written on your face.”

As expected of a Saint—her intuition was spot on. Erica felt her tension slowly easing.

Why not just dump all of her worries since they had been exposed anyway?

“Actually…”

Erica decided to share everything that had happened. Why she chose to be a vegetarian and why she had come here.

Rize responded with a gentle smile, quietly listening. That calm attitude gave Erica more courage, so she elaborated more.

“I was told that my heart isn’t the problem, but that I, as a person, am selfish. Hearing that shocked me.”

“Hmm, I see.”

“What’s the Saint’s perspective? Am I wrong, or is my heart the issue?”

“I think both are problems.”

“……Huh?”

Rize’s reply to Erica’s heartfelt question cut straight to the chase. It was a shocking answer saying both were issues.

When Erica heard that, she sat there, bewildered. Rize weighed in further, her smile still intact.

“Your feelings are not wrong, Erica. But problems are scattered here and there. You mentioned you value life and have turned to vegetarianism, right?”

“Th-That’s right…”

“And you come from a family famous for its livestock, correct?”

“Y-Yes.”

“Then do you know how much grain a cow consumes?”

“That… is…”

She knew. Cows eat a massive amount of grains just due to their size.

Without that amount, they wouldn’t survive. While Erica was pondering that thought…

“Given that grain amount, you could save other lives. But that’s the amount a cow needs to eat to stay alive.”

“……”

“The wilderness is even worse. Especially elephants, who need to consume tremendous amounts just to sustain life. If that happens, other animals will go hungry.”

To maintain their existence, living beings must consume something. And eating means ‘competition.’

Animals battle daily against the looming threat of death, and humans, who have established civilization, are no different.

Even with all the advancements in civilization, there are still people starving to death in corners of the world. An undeniably ironic situation.

“You define harming life as evil and view vegetarianism as good, correct? Then are the swarms of locusts ruining crops every year evil or good?”

“….They’re evil. If they ruin crops, people won’t have anything to eat.”

“I see. They only eat grass, yet…”

“….”

The more Erica conversed with Rize, the more confusion reigned in her mind.

The beliefs she had firmly held were beginning to wobble. This felt different from when Kara had confronted her.

With Kara, it felt like being smashed with a hammer, while with Rize, it was as if the very roots of her convictions were being withered away.

She couldn’t even muster a retort. The moment she tried, another counter-argument would surely follow.

“Erica, the essence of life is defined as ‘evil’ while people highly value ‘good.’ That’s why humans tend to underestimate the essence of life as ‘evil.'”

“….”

“You mustn’t deny the essence of life. That selfish heart can lead to self-destruction.”

“So, what should I…”

Erica murmured in a tearful tone. With Rize’s negative words thrown in, she lost her grasp on things.

She didn’t know how to uphold her convictions, wishing someone could help her.

“Don’t worry. I’ll help you.”

“W-What?”

“Since you’re a friend of Brother Sivar, I can assist you personally.”

“R-Really? Y-You’re willing to help someone like me?”

“No.”

Rize shook her head vigorously, then continued with that same smile.

“You, Erica, have enough qualifications. You just have some areas to improve.”

“Improve…?”

“Yes. A selfish mindset and altruistic beliefs. I’ll help balance them out.”

“How…?”

“There’s a saying. Nothing worthwhile comes without some pain.”

With a bright smile, Rize uttered those words.

“Are you ready to embrace the suffering?”

“….”

Erica nodded slowly.

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