Chapter 153

EP.153 Confess Your Love #2

“Haah… Haah…”

Her chest felt so tight.

The feeling of suffocation. Dr. Jennifer Cash, placing her hand over her heart, blankly stared at Jihyuk’s car leaving the outdoor parking lot through the curtains.

By the time the car disappeared from sight, she slumped to the floor.

Covering her mouth with her hand, she sobbed.

“Hic…!”

It all happened because of Edward’s belongings hidden in the utility room.

She hadn’t even mentioned it, so it was natural for Jihyuk to misunderstand.

In fact, it wasn’t even a misunderstanding.

There wasn’t a single thing wrong with what Jihyuk had said.

She couldn’t forget, she was unnecessarily sensitive, and she hid it because she was afraid Jihyuk would see.

=If only I had told him earlier. If I had, I would have tried harder…=

=Let’s spend some time together. I’ll contact you later.=

Jihyuk’s words echoed in her mind.

That’s right. She should have told him earlier.

If she had, given Jihyuk’s personality, he would have treated her better.

She felt so sorry. Her selfishness had caused him great disappointment.

“Huff…”

It hurts. Her heart feels so tight she can’t breathe properly.

It’s driving her crazy. She’s never felt this way before.

It’s a pain she never even felt when she was with Edward.

After gasping for breath for a while, the doctor got up like a zombie and headed to the fridge.

She gulped down the cold water.

A sharp pain shot through her head.

As the cold water flowed down her throat and reached her chest, she felt like she was coming to her senses.

She wanted to call Jihyuk right away, but she felt like it would only push him further away.

Waiting for him to contact her first was excruciating.

But she deserved this punishment.

Yes, this is punishment.

It’s only natural to be punished when you make a mistake.

She would reflect deeply and be ready to run to him when he contacted her.

With that thought, the doctor went to her bedroom and flopped onto the bed.

Just yesterday, this was the place where she whispered sweet nothings with Jihyuk… Now it’s so quiet.

It hasn’t even been a minute, but she feels so lonely. It’s driving her insane.

It used to feel familiar, but now she can’t adjust at all.

“Eek…!”

Gritting her teeth, the doctor got up and went back to the living room.

Sitting on the sofa, she thought of Jihyuk again, but she shook her head and turned on the TV.

The variety show she was supposed to watch with Jihyuk was still on.

A comedian was making funny faces, imitating a celebrity.

She’s so angry she could go crazy, and yet they’re laughing like that.

“Ahhh!”

Unable to contain her anger, the doctor screamed and threw the remote at the TV.

Crack!

The bottom of the TV cracked, and vertical lines appeared.

A violent act she wouldn’t normally do.

It showed just how unstable her mind was right now.

“Phew… Phew…”

But it felt like she was calming down.

Now she understood why stress-relief methods like breaking things were so popular.

Tears streamed down the doctor’s face again.

Why was she so worked up?

Probably…

=I really love you, but it feels like you only see me as a toy.=

It was after Jihyuk said that.

“No!”

No, absolutely not.

Why would she think of Jihyuk as a toy? He’s someone truly precious to her.

She desperately denied it, but there was no one to listen.

Instead, the echoing sound only made her feel worse.

She wanted to smash something. She had never been this worked up before.

“Huuuuk…!”

Feeling strange about her changed self, the doctor burst into tears again.

She went into the bedroom and opened the closet.

She grabbed a handful of Jihyuk’s clothes and lay down on the bed, smelling them.

Even though they were freshly washed, they still smelled like Jihyuk.

Imagining Jihyuk’s strong arms embracing her, the doctor unconsciously moved her hand downward.

And then she thrust her middle finger inside.

Squish…

“Haah… Ugh…”

She tried to get excited, but it didn’t work at all.

Even when she inserted two, then three fingers, it didn’t help.

Thinking of Jihyuk only made her a little wet, and that was it.

These fingers couldn’t satisfy her at all.

Her head hurt so much. She felt pathetic, acting like a pervert.

=If your head hurts, work. Make a device or something. You like working, don’t you?=

That’s right. She should work to clear her head.

She needed to make a device for Silvia, Adeline, and another hero.

If she focused on work and kept busy, she might feel better.

The doctor jumped out of bed and, without even dressing properly, went to the entrance.

She grabbed her car keys from the hook above the shoe rack.

Click! Whoosh-!

Opening the front door, she saw the rain pouring down heavily.

This damn rain… It’s so annoying.

If it had a form, she would kill it.

Crunch!

Gritting her teeth, the doctor got into the car, not caring about getting wet.

Pressing the ignition button, the dashboard and other systems came to life with beeping sounds.

Releasing the handbrake, she immediately started the car.

Vrooom-! Clunk!

“Ahhh!”

She had pressed the accelerator too hard and hit the parking lot fence.

The impact shook her body, and she slammed the steering wheel.

Bang!

The horn honked briefly, and the startled doctor’s face trembled before she screamed.

“Ahhhhh!!!”

Could she even make it to the lab in this state?

There was a high chance of a major accident.

But what could she do? She had to do something.

The doctor took deep breaths, reversed the car, and pressed the accelerator again.

Vrooom…

This time, she slowly and safely exited the parking lot.

Stay calm, stay calm. Let’s listen to some music.

While driving, the doctor said, “Classical.”

The car’s built-in AI system started playing music.

The piece was Vivaldi’s Four Seasons, Summer, 3rd Movement.

The fast tempo creating tension made the doctor shout, “Shut up!”

The music stopped abruptly.

The doctor manually changed the song while driving.

Chopin’s Nocturne No. 2. The gentle piano sound tickled her ears, but it didn’t calm her down at all.

Instead, it only made her feel sadder.

It was her misjudgment. Classical music sounds different depending on your mood…

In the end, the doctor turned off the music.

Just then,

Beep-! Beep-!

A warning sound went off in the car, and it automatically changed lanes.

“Gasp!”

It was the collision detection system.

If it weren’t for that, she would have crashed into the car in front.

The doctor’s heart turned cold as she realized how close she had come to disaster.

“Pathetic…”

She felt truly pathetic.

She should have just used the self-driving mode…

And to think she was going to make a device in this state of mind, unable to even think straight.

She wasn’t acting like a scientist at all.

If she went to the lab like this, she would only waste precious polymers.

In the end, she set her destination to home and turned on the self-driving mode.

Then, she took out her phone and turned on the location tracker. Seeing that Jihyuk was at a bar on Han-daero, her nose tingled.

The fact that he went to a bar instead of going home meant he was suffering just like her.

She felt so sorry she couldn’t face him.

Gently stroking the red dot marking Jihyuk’s location, the doctor got out of the car as it arrived home.

Checking the front bumper in the rain, she saw it was completely crumpled.

Just like her heart.

“Hic…”

Walking weakly, she stopped at the front door, hoping Jihyuk would welcome her inside.

Even though she knew full well that wouldn’t happen.

Beep! Click.

Entering the quiet house, she got angry at herself again.

Standing still in the living room, fuming, she headed to the utility room.

She thought seeing her late husband’s belongings would calm her down.

But it only made her angrier.

That frame… the album… the golf clubs…

If it weren’t for her late husband’s belongings, if she had just thrown them away, things wouldn’t have gotten this bad…

“Gasp!”

The doctor snapped out of her terrifying thoughts.

Looking at her hands, she realized she was holding the frame.

Something heavy dropped in her chest with a thud.

Was she about to throw this on the floor?

Was she so infatuated with a man she had only known for a few months, a man she had only been intimate with for about two weeks, that she was ready to discard her late husband?

‘This can’t go on… I need to sleep…’

She couldn’t make rational decisions in this state.

She should just sleep.

But she couldn’t sleep… Right, she should take some sleeping pills.

Having made up her mind, the doctor opened the medicine cabinet on the shelf with the broken TV and searched for the pills.

Luckily, she found the fast-acting sleeping pills she had been prescribed when she suffered from insomnia before.

The recommended dose was two pills.

The doctor took four pills, twice the dose, and swallowed them with water.

Then she went into the bedroom and collapsed onto the bed as if falling forward.

The bed was soaked from the rain, but she didn’t care about such trivial things.

‘I miss you…’

She really missed Jihyuk.

She was going crazy.

The feeling of losing her mind from the rapid emotional changes… It was terrifying.

She needed someone to calm her down, and that person was Jihyuk, but he wasn’t here, so her chest felt heavy.

Her eyelids grew heavy.

The pills were working. She should have taken them earlier…

She wished everything that had happened was just a dream.

She wished she could wake up with Jihyuk by her side.

With that thought, the doctor’s eyes slowly closed.

**

“Huh…”

I clicked my tongue as I watched the doctor through the tracking demon.

I expected her to react strongly, but I didn’t think it would be this severe.

Overdosing on sleeping pills… That was the doctor’s defense mechanism, shocked by her own violent behavior.

She was scared of her unfamiliar self and wanted to forget by sleeping.

The doctor ended up like this because of me, and she knew it well.

‘With her in that state, the course is clear.’

I was planning to wait until she came to me, but it seems unnecessary now.

I went to the doctor’s house and checked on her, completely submerged in her emotions.

There was a bit of blood on the soles of her feet.

She must have stepped on the broken remote and TV parts while searching for the sleeping pills.

Her breathing was regular, and her pupils were normal.

But since she was anxious, I should put her in the lab’s treatment machine.

I carried the doctor out and put her in the car.

Then, I took her to the lab and placed her in the treatment machine, monitoring her.

Everything was normal; there was no need for treatment.

Her feet were a bit concerning, but it wasn’t serious.

Besides, treatment might remove the sleeping pill’s effects, so I decided against it.

Returning home, I undressed the doctor and took her to the bathroom for a quick wash.

Then, I laid her on the sofa, carefully examined her feet, and removed the embedded shards.

After applying medicine and bandaging her feet, I looked around the living room.

It wasn’t a complete mess, but it was dirty.

The broken TV, the rainwater from the entrance to the bedroom…

‘I need to clean up.’

I ended up doing a major cleaning I never planned to do, but… Since I’m not corrupting her with malice, I can endure this much hardship until the training is complete.

First, I changed all the bedsheets and blankets in the bedroom.

After moving the doctor there, I started cleaning the living room.

I’ll even make her some porridge when she wakes up.

So, when she wakes up, she better be so moved that she runs to me.

To be continued―――――――――――――――――――――

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