Chapter 123

I noticed that I was being followed after a week had passed. The person following me did not appear regularly; sometimes I could feel their presence, and other times I couldn’t, which made me even more on edge.

Although I thought there would be some dramatic changes after realizing it, unfortunately, I was only left with the state of having to keep an eye on things, without any other choice.

Eventually, due to my fatigue and increased sensitivity, even though time had passed, I still couldn’t sleep well at night. There were days when I was troubled for more than two days, and when I went out, I became even more sensitive than usual.

When meeting my girlfriend, I tried to meet outdoors as much as possible and was cautious about whether someone was following me even when going directly to her house.

Especially when going to headquarters, my sensitivity reached its peak, and I started checking my surroundings from the moment I left home. Looking back, I seemed to have fallen asleep unintentionally when using transportation methods.

Several times, I felt a presence nearby and quickly pursued it, but the stalker, who could not hide their presence but was quick on their feet, left only small traces behind before fleeing.

Finally, my agitated mind led me to think that I might have missed something, and this continuous thinking led to a situation where I couldn’t focus on my girlfriend during our time together.

Even though I felt annoyed when I realized I couldn’t concentrate on either side, none of my girlfriends said anything when they saw me unable to focus.

They probably thought I was worrying about work.

On Tuesday evening, I went to SuA’s house and spent time together. Of course, I was cautious until just before entering the house, and fortunately, there was no surveillance that day, so I could enter SuA’s house with peace of mind.

That day, I felt most acutely how visibly tired I was.

SuA usually spoke harshly to me while playing games, and I also responded harshly to her, showing our feelings towards each other.

From this alone, it might seem like we had bad feelings towards each other, but SuA has a rough way of expressing herself, and once you think about it, you can see that her rough expressions are a way of trying to hide her sudden affection.

Even if this doesn’t look good, I could understand SuA’s actions because I used to be quite rough in my expressions, and I didn’t feel that she was doing this out of negative feelings towards me, so I took it lightly.

My response to SuA with rough expressions is similar. I don’t have any bad feelings towards SuA, and I chose a rough expression method to avoid making SuA uncomfortable with her rough manner.

Returning to the main point, SuA expressed her emotions with harsh curses both when playing games and in daily conversations, but recently, she had stopped using harsh language with me altogether.

Naturally, we discussed this as well.

When I asked, “You haven’t cursed in a few days?” SuA opened her eyes wide and looked at me, asking, “Want me to?”

And then,

“I’m restraining myself because I’ve been acting strange lately.”

She added. Only then did I realize.

SuA’s worried eyes showed how bad my condition was. And I realized that others must have noticed too.

Thinking that mentioning that I looked stressed would be stressful itself, I tried not to talk about my state as much as possible.

Somehow, Yura, who usually sang about having sex whenever we met on weekends, didn’t bring up the topic when I went home. Although I initiated the conversation and we ended up having sex that day, it seemed Yura was also watching the situation carefully.

In the end, even though we played games and slept together on Tuesday at SuA’s place, we didn’t have sex. It felt odd not to have sex after such a long time of sleeping together.

On Wednesday, I deliberately played games at SuA’s place until sunset because the process of going out and returning home bothered me.

SuA played games and ate with me as usual, and around sunset, we left her house and headed home.

Before entering the building, I checked again to make sure no one was around, then entered. After entering the password on the door lock and opening the door, I entered the house. Yubin was sitting on the sofa.

“Been here all along?”

Seeing Yubin here, despite tomorrow being the showdown, I felt a bit puzzled and took off my shoes before entering.

“……I said I’d come.”

“Huh? Did you?”

Yubin had recently started school and had gone to school on weekdays, so the time we spent together had sharply decreased after starting school.

After listening to Yubin, I tried to check the messages we exchanged, but I stopped when I felt her gaze directed at me.

“Why?”

“Why? You asked why now?”

Yubin’s voice was sharp, and I wondered if something unpleasant had happened. With a tired body, I fell onto the bed.

“You stayed out last night.”

“Yeah.”

I answered honestly since I knew she was aware of my absence and turned my face sideways slightly, burying it in the pillow. Yubin’s red eyes were staring at me intently, and her frown created wrinkles between her brows.

“What’s going on? Something bad happened?”

I stretched my hand to caress her head, but Yubin pushed it away.

Caught off guard by the sudden situation, I couldn’t even think of getting up to have a proper conversation and continued lying down, looking at her. Yubin’s trembling lips slowly opened.

“All weekend, you stayed out, and last week, you stayed out several times during weekdays.”

I already knew that staying out frequently was happening. If I met others, staying out was basically a given, and Yura and Hayang only met on weekends, so they always stayed at my place when we did.

Since I couldn’t tell the truth, I said it was due to work, and Yubin didn’t say much about it. But her sharp tone was hard to understand.

“I told you I couldn’t come in because of work.”

“When?”

My thought process froze at her last statement.

When was the last time I told Yubin I was staying out?

I couldn’t remember. Yesterday, the day before, and last week, besides feeling stressed due to various issues, I couldn’t recall anything else.

After frequent stays out began, I hadn’t always informed Yubin about every stay out. There were days when I couldn’t contact her about a stay out, and I thought Yubin might have been busy with work at those times.

Although Yubin showed slight disappointment later when we talked about not informing her, I didn’t pay much attention.

But my overly sensitive mind prevented me from reaching that far in my thoughts.

Even while together, my thoughts never ceased. I had to think about what I had already done and plan for what needed to be done in the future.

Right now, instead of focusing on what Yubin was saying, I was thinking about what to do afterward. My words came out as,

“……Let’s talk later.”

This was an attempt to avoid the current situation.

Hearing this, Yubin seemed to be choked up and suddenly stood up. Her clenched fist was trembling, and her wavering eyes were fixed on me.

“Why are you like this lately? When I text you, you don’t even reply properly, and you’re not home for a whole week, and you sleep outside more often than at home!”

“It’s because of work.”

“A whole week of work?! Can’t you spare a little time to talk to me when you come home! What did you do today? How difficult was it!”

Unable to find words to respond to her continuous barrage of questions. Tomorrow is the showdown, and after that, I need to contact others… it might be better to meet briefly with Milky Way for dinner. I need to check if there’s anyone following me while moving, and…

“Even when I ask what’s wrong, you barely answer! Every time I see you, you look exhausted, and when I ask if you’re okay, you just say let’s talk later! Do you even understand how hard it is for me to wait before you tell me everything?!”

…When was the last time I had a proper conversation with Yubin? I couldn’t remember clearly.

Upon coming home, the first thing I wanted to do was rest, and I turned my head away from looking at Yubin.

I traced the lines on the white wallpaper with my eyes.

At home, I just wanted to rest for a moment, but I wished I could skip it today. But since Yubin was worried about me, I decided to listen quietly.

However, contrary to my thoughts, Yubin’s voice grew louder when she saw me turn my head away.

“Why?! Really! Can’t we just talk? Are you hiding something from me?! Huh?!”

She shook my body to make me face her, and I pushed her hand away.

“Hide?”

I know. I know I’m not in a position to confidently say anything to anyone.

I know I’m hiding something important from Yubin.

But, Yubin is also hiding something important from me. Four months have passed since we started dating, and Yubin still hasn’t told me she is a hyper-human.

Even though I know she is a hyper-human, it made me angry that she asked if there was anything else hidden when I had never heard her say the word “hyper-human” directly.

As I sat up, I turned my head back and directed my gaze at her. Even though I knew I wasn’t in a position to scold her, I frowned and looked at her, and Yubin stopped talking, feeling the unusual atmosphere of my gaze.

“Can you say confidently that you’re not hiding anything from me?!”

The fatigue and sensitivity accumulated over the past few weeks were directed at the innocent Yubin.

Yubin’s lower lip trembled, and after instinctively raising my voice in anger, my reason returned.

But although my reason returned, my emotions were not completely calmed down. My agitated mind still felt angry and couldn’t take back the sharp gaze directed at Yubin.

“……”

Yubin’s silent gaze dropped. She probably realized that she was hiding something too.

Although I knew the explosion wasn’t caused by Yubin, my emotions weren’t settled, and I felt talking further would only increase my anger, so I avoided her gaze.

Feeling my gaze avoid her, Yubin opened her eyes wide.

“Oh, ba…”

She cautiously called me and stretched out her hand, but I turned away and lay on the bed, facing her back.

It’s nothing significant. This situation arose over something insignificant. If we had a proper conversation, even if I continued lying, a proper conversation could resolve it.

“……Let’s talk later.”

Maybe because I don’t feel settled myself? Right now, I didn’t want to talk.

Lying on my back, I couldn’t see Yubin’s figure, but I felt that she was standing still without moving from her spot.

I heard the sound of tidying up. Yubin was silent, and the only sound in the quiet room was the rustling of her clothes.

Finally, the front door opened and closed.

I heard the door lock click and a few seconds later. When I turned my head, Yubin was gone.

I felt ashamed of myself. What could I possibly say to Yubin to justify my behavior?

The biggest problem and the one who made the biggest mistake was not Yubin but me. Why did I lose my temper with a flimsy excuse of being tired? Yubin had only waited for my call and worried about me.

“Haah……”

I sighed as I placed my arm over my forehead.

Now, I’ve reached my limit. I’ve lost control of myself.

It’s true that everyone is doing well, and it’s also true that Yubin is the most comfortable for me. But because I got comfortable and accustomed to that comfort, I ended up lashing out at her. Even during that moment, I felt confused about why I was acting this way, but I couldn’t control my emotions and ended up hurting Yubin.

First, I need to wrap up the showdown tomorrow and then find the self-study room to apologize tonight.