Chapter 83

The Countess who taught me swordsmanship in my childhood always scolded me with a cold expression.

“You’re not even a mediocre talent. If you were at least a dullard, I might have tried to teach you something.”

At the time, I saw her as my mother, and so I never stopped striving for her approval.

There were times I trained until I literally collapsed from exhaustion, but she never even glanced at me.

“…Pathetic beyond words. Instead of wasting your effort in the training grounds, you might as well study.”

She stomped on the sword I received as a gift from the Count and shattered it.

“Disgusting. Both you, who look like a fool, and I, who see you as one. Truly pathetic and revolting.”

Even my Master, who turned me into a monster, didn’t fully acknowledge my talent.

“Staff fighting and bare-handed combat… that’s all you have. Frankly, compared to others, your talent is lacking. You’re the most ordinary, I’d say… But you know, battles aren’t fought with talent.”

He was the worst in terms of personality, but he wasn’t a liar.

“Your weapon isn’t something as trivial as talent. Even your staff fighting and bare-handed combat would be surpassed by the Demon King. So, what you should rely on isn’t that.”

I asked what I should rely on. At the time, I was even more foolish than I am now.

“Madness. Your madness, the kind that says you don’t care if you die, is your greatest weapon. Someone who can’t die until they achieve revenge can’t defeat someone who fights as if they don’t care if they die.”

Back then, I didn’t understand those words. Maybe I still don’t. Understanding is always evolving, and what I understand now might seem like a ridiculous misunderstanding in the future.

I just push forward with my current understanding and do everything I can.

—

I stomped down with a foot imbued with strong resonance, shattering the Queen’s instep.

“…Ugh.”

“I don’t know how you regenerated your wings and arms, but this will just be a repeat of that day.”

After many twists and turns, I defeated her.

I cut off her arm and tore off her wings. I almost had my guts spill out too, but a win is a win.

Although I couldn’t deliver the final blow due to the unfavorable situation, I thought she wouldn’t survive in a society where the strong prey on the weak.

“Queen. I don’t know you deeply.”

“Well, you can get to know me from now on…”

“That’s why I don’t intend to judge your life. I won’t condemn you for killing the king who loved you.”

Then, the Queen’s expression changed.

“…How do you know that?”

“It’s just a trivial skill. Rarely, I can catch fragments of memories from those touched by my resonance. My Master said it’s related to resonance through vibration. I don’t know the details either.”

It’s not something I do intentionally, nor can I see everyone’s memories. What I can see are just fleeting fragments.

It’s merely a byproduct of my resonance-based attacks.

“My husband. You’re lovely, but that topic is a bit uncomfortable…”

“Why do you deceive even your own memories and heart? If you’ve twisted the memory of your motives, then it’s clearly…”

“Enough!”

“Your acting is truly clumsy. The role of a madman requires profound acting skills. Was your half-baked madman act that enjoyable?”

“…Now I think I understand a little why you’re avoided. My beloved husband.”

“What’s most terrifying is that your love isn’t an act.”

—

I wasn’t so foolish as to not recognize the love directed at me. For reasons unknown, the Queen was infatuated with me. After taking away my love, she loved me.

It sounds contradictory, but it was an undeniable fact.

I couldn’t accept that love, nor did I want to.

“Raul Berze. My husband. Instead of such trivial talk, I want to reaffirm our love!”

As the Queen swung her arm, countless invisible slashes flew at me.

Each sharp scale became a small blade, launching slashes. The surrounding area was devastated, and I was wounded, bleeding.

Our fighting styles were very similar. We excelled in balancing offense and defense, wielded unique slashes and strikes, and preferred close combat.

“It hurts.”

“Pain is our pleasure. By giving and receiving pain, our love will deepen.”

“That’s hard to understand. If pain is pleasure, then why did you…”

At that moment, the Queen’s fist aimed to strike my face.

I barely blocked it with my staff, but if I had failed, my mouth would have been shattered.

“My husband… enough of this trivial talk…!”

“Was my interpretation wrong? From the memories I saw… it seemed you pitied the old king, who was reduced to a rag, groaning in pain.”

“…That can’t be, my husband. That pitiful, pathetic king.”

I didn’t expect my interpretation to be wrong again.

In the memory I saw, the old dragon was reduced to a rag, groaning under the Demon King’s slashes. Meanwhile, the Demon King only had a broken arm and leg, and the old dragon’s claws never reached his life.

That’s why I thought she couldn’t bear to watch and stabbed him in the back. It seemed like she stabbed him to ease the old dragon’s pain, to prevent him from dying by another’s hand.

The old dragon seemed to acknowledge her kindness.

—

“By the way, the old king…”

“Raul Berze. My beloved husband. Please, shut your mouth…!”

“You’re truly kind. Did you deceive everyone? To make it seem like the old king died tragically due to a vile betrayal, not because he was outmatched.”

“I told you to stop…!”

“Indeed, you’re the worst stain on me, worse than filth…”

—

The Queen, as if sensing what I was about to say next, reached out in anger.

Her movements were unnaturally large and filled with agitation. It was unlike her usual style of fighting with meticulous skill.

This emotion was probably rage.

—

“To the old king, you were like a beloved daughter.”

—

As I spat out those words, I grabbed her wrist as it flew toward my heart.

—

“Presumably, those arms and wings are also the result of using his remains. Among the remains I destroyed, the most intact parts were his arms and wings. You must have used sorcery to attach them. Just a guess, though.”

But it was the most plausible guess. In sorcery, perception is the most important. If the subject has a deeper connection than blood, the soul’s compatibility would be high, allowing the bones to be attached without side effects.

The rest would be assimilating them using lifespan or power and regenerating the rest. Since her power hasn’t waned, she must have sacrificed her lifespan. The most common and convenient offering.

“…Please stop.”

“You’re kinder than you look. From reading that memory today, I realized. You truly are…”

“Please stop.”

“A pitiful dragon. Not because you can’t feel, but because you’re not honest with yourself.”

—

The Queen charged at me in anger, but her rage-filled movements created openings.

I cut off her left arm with a hand blade imbued with the strongest resonance I’ve ever mustered.

—

“The only times you’re honest are when you whisper love to me and when you tell me to stop.”

“If you say more, I’ll really get angry.”

“Truly pure.”

“Raul Berze…!”

—

She stumbled toward me, dragging her body, now missing an arm, but I wasn’t so rusty as to fall for such an attack.

Losing an arm threw off her balance, and charging before adapting was her mistake.

And since I’m not kind enough to overlook such mistakes, I had no choice but to use my short staff to strike her wing joint and tear off one of her wings.

“…Will you do more?”

Even if she regenerated her arm and wing, she had already lost to me once.

In the end, we were back to the same starting point; she hadn’t become stronger than me.

“If you surrender now, I’m willing to accept your surrender. On the condition that you stop this rain.”

Then, the Queen grabbed her head with her remaining arm and began to mutter.

“…You’re truly frustrating and lovely. Even after piling shame upon shame, you’re still lovely. I must be quite mad too.”

“How deep and vast must this love be that no other emotions can shine? No matter how much I try to be angry at you, love always covers that anger.”

“Only gaps born from anger remain. I can’t summon the strength to kill you…”

“Then… then… I won’t hold back. All my feelings for you.”

I couldn’t understand her words.

She probably couldn’t understand them either.

In this festival of misunderstanding, a cool breeze blew, and untimely flowers began to bloom.

“Anemones…?”

It wasn’t the season for them to bloom, nor were they the kind of flowers that would suddenly bloom in such a deep forest.

“Raul Berze. I also can’t understand my feelings. But the cause of those feelings isn’t important, right?”

—

“Raul Berze. I love you.”

“…..”

“That’s why I want to die with you.”

—

I could understand the sentiment behind that confession.

I, too, had loved someone like that once.

—

“You’ll come to love me too.”

“……”

“Because you’re like me. More than anyone else.”