When I returned home, my eyelids began to flutter as fatigue set in.
I must not succumb to this drowsiness.
I took the lunch box that was stuck in the refrigerator and put it in the microwave for 1 minute and 30 seconds.
“Shiyeon… you have to wake up…”
As the microwave hummed and the turntable spun, I tried to wake Shiyeon.
She resisted with a short groan and some useless tossing and turning, but once she was awake,
there was no way she could ignore this method.
A perfect side tickle between her waist and armpit.
Finding a gap where her fingers could dig in, only small fingers went there to wake her up.
“Wake up!”
“Gah, no! Ugh…”
By the time Shiyeon, twisting her body from the tickling, rubbed her eyes and got up,
the microwave beeped, notifying that the first lunch box was heated.
I took out the warm first lunch box, replaced it with a second one, and set the same time again.
After making sure everything was clean, fed, dressed well, and arriving at school on time….
‘I’m so tired.’
Slumped over my desk, I closed my eyes for a moment.
If it became the first class time, I would have to wake up.
Unfortunately, my seat was right in front of the teacher’s desk, a position where I could not possibly sleep even if I tried to do so secretly.
Still, for today, I would cling to a thread of hope.
Because today is the day.
“Okay, everyone stand up and come to the front—”
Breaking free from the ridiculous alphabetical seating arrangement that was so unreasonable from Kim’s perspective, it was one of the few opportunities to draw lots to escape to the back seat.
‘Oh God, Buddha, Allah…’
Praying for a high number to come up, I even pulled in gods that I thought didn’t exist and prayed in that moment.
I reached into the lottery box and continued to rummage about, feeling no significance in my actions.
The first lottery ticket, I had a bad feeling.
The second lottery ticket, this one didn’t seem right either.
The third lottery ticket felt like it would also be in the tens.
The fourth lottery ticket, this is it.
The heaviness coming from a particularly large piece of paper among the others.
This was the only one.
‘Please—!’
I picked out the paper from the ballot box with my thumb and index finger.
With trembling hands, I carefully unfolded the small piece of paper.
The brilliant black letters that existed inside, bringing me rest…..
[3]
‘Damn.’
Instead of the comfort I sought, it was a number that would bring me painful misery.
Just one slot. Just one slot, I had only moved to the left.
What was on the right side of the teacher’s desk had now become the left side.
I should have just drawn the first lottery ticket I picked.
But by the time I realized that, it was already too late.
After all the kids in the class picked their tickets, it was time to switch seats and bring our desks.
The rattling noise rang loudly in the classroom, and then gradually died down.
“A.”
As if to add insult to injury, a boy who drew number 4.
That was the guy who had recently gifted my head a mop of dirty water.
Until the next time the seating arrangement changes, it seems I won’t be able to talk to the boy next to me.
“Is there anyone who has bad eyesight and needs to sit in the front?”
The last chance to change seats.
For this, I could only hope someone would raise their hand.
The trembling of my anxious legs rattled against the desk, resonating between a thin thread of hope and the unease that it would end just like this.
Please, the back seat… no, even the back seat of a friend with a moderately large body would be fine.
Someone, save this magical girl suffering from chronic sleep deprivation.
Gods who just abandoned me a moment ago, please let it rain once more.
“Let’s just assume it’s not there?”
With the teacher’s words, all those prayers became meaningless, and the seats were confirmed as they were.
‘God is dead.’
I released my hands that I had been earnestly gathering.
Despair over the prayers that meant nothing to anyone.
I repeated the resentment mixed with emptiness inside.
God is dead.
It wasn’t meant in this way, but it was a fitting combination of words to sum up the current situation.
If there is such a being as God, one thing is for sure: at least he was indifferent towards me.
How can the world be like this?
‘No way?’
Turning the thoughts I just heard upside down, I reconsidered my complaints about indifference.
Maybe it wasn’t indifference at all, but perhaps they actively dislike me.
Did my simultaneous prayers offend their feelings?
So they’re trying to take matters into their own hands.
…Perhaps because I couldn’t sleep, all sorts of thoughts were surfacing.
‘Humans can get this crazy.’
Putting aside the nonsensical thoughts, I simply waited for the fifth-period class to end.
Even on my way back, I half-closed my eyes, dozing off on my way to the apartment.
When I walked up to the front door, the cat’s food bowl and box that had been on the first floor were gone.
Today was a day like an unhappy desert, completely dry.
I appreciated that the seeds I sprinkled last night had bloomed into a few drops of needed rain.
‘Thank you, thank you, thank you.’
I shouted inwardly that the gods were not harsh after all, and I wanted to toast to the lost resting place of the cat.
As I approached the spot where the food and water bowls had been, a notably different piece of paper was stuck there than before.
[Here’s what you’ll see if you throw cat food like a fucking idiot.]
‘Oh.’
Not just any text printed simply from a computer, my eyes widened as I caught sight of a warning written in beautiful calligraphy.
The thrilling and exciting opening, instantly captivating me as I read it.
Beyond the profanities I couldn’t dare to repeat lay a thin thread of remaining rationality.
Describing the supposed obligation to adopt the stray cats if you feel sorry for them, alongside a warning that you wouldn’t be left alone if you happened to encounter a food bowl or something.
The anger I could relate to was palpable even from the paper.
Someone must have cleaned up any food and water bowls.
If there’s someone capable of going this far in an apartment, the cat problem should be resolved soon.
Feeling a sense of relief at that intensity, I returned to our home.
Now, the only remaining issue was probably the noise between the floors.
“Not again…”
Thud thud thud thud thud thud, the noise from upstairs still echoed.
With short strides, pattering away.
Thinking about the one upstairs living there, it’s obviously the sound of a child just starting to walk.
Knowing this couldn’t go on, I decided to speak up first.
Based on the big data collected from the community, it probably wouldn’t help at all.
Standing in front of the door of the neighbor’s apartment, a place I thought I’d never visit outside of our own home.
“Phew…”
Standing there, I let out a long sigh that could hardly be attributed to a child.
What I needed to converse with now could very well be a beast disguised as a human.
Act as age-appropriate, as if a screw had come loose somewhere.
I am an elementary school student in the lower grade.
I am an elementary school girl in the lower grade.
It was time to turn off the complex words and curses for a moment.
With the innocence of a child who would not lie.
They should act in such a way that a human being would feel guilt.
“Hmm, phew…”
Once again, a deep breath.
At the end of that deep breath, I extended my arm and knocked on the door.
Beyond the heavy sound of my two knocks, someone’s voice came through.
“Who is it?”
A voice that sounded muddled as it passed through the iron door.
I had expected a woman’s voice laced with hostility, but oddly enough, it was a man’s voice.
The door opened without checking who was standing outside.
A man in a loosely fitting gray short-sleeve shirt and long pants appeared.
“Hello!”
Before he could even say anything, I cheerfully greeted him.
From the forcibly raised voice came a somewhat childish sound appropriate for his age.
The man looked a bit flustered and glanced around.
“Uh, yeah. Who are you?”
“I live in the apartment below. The footsteps are loud.”
“Oh, uh, okay?”
It seemed that being directly pointed out by a child took him off guard, as his expression turned sheepish.
Looking inside through the door crack.
Of course, the internal structure was no different from our floor, and there was inevitably a child who appeared to be no more than preschool age running around inside.
Whether that child was jumping about or what they were eating, the aunt watching TV showed no interest whatsoever.
“Um, I’m sorry. I thought about getting a mat soon…”
“That’s fine.”
That was the end of the conversation.
Giving a light bow of the head, I returned to our floor, feeling strangely proud that it had resolved easily.
It seemed that the man who looked like the child’s father was a sensible person.
“Honey, what’s going on?”
“Oh, the kid from downstairs came up for a second.”
As I walked down the stairs, the aunt’s unpleasant voice scratched inside my ear.
After thinking the noise between the floors had been resolved, days later….
Thud thud, thud thud thud thud.
The community’s big data was not wrong.
What was wrong was me, and what was right was them.
‘It hasn’t improved at all.’
Shiyeon and I were still living with earplugs when falling asleep.
In fact, the child’s strong footsteps had become even more frequent.
It certainly backed up the argument of the doctrine of original sin.
The foolishness of trusting humanity, even if just for a moment, filled me with regret.
“Hey, Gomtaengi.”
In the end, I called out to the bear plushie lying on the cushion with firm determination.
“Yes?”
“Let’s just buy a computer and a speaker.”
Rather than being a victim, I would live as a perpetrator.
That was the solid resolution I had made.
