Chapter 50

I stared blankly at the blue sky.

The sun, which had been hanging high, had tilted slightly. The lonely cloud that had floated by was long gone.

“How much has Head Priest Giovanni given up?”

Priest Matthew did not answer immediately. He simply gazed at the sky with me.

“…I have given everything.”

He let it slip out, like a lament.

“To protect the students… is that so?”

“That’s right.”

“And what happened after that?”

“Brother Johann ultimately succumbed to the demons and gave himself over to them. Yet, he never lost his desire to protect the students. He welcomed the students who visited the chapel warmly, and he tried to ignore the whispers of the demons.”

Head Priest Giovanni was not an irresponsible man. He was no brutish human, nor was he part of a heretical group that worshipped demons.

“Brother Johann endured for nearly a month. He resisted the whispers of the demons tenaciously until the exorcist team arrived.”

He was simply a responsible adult.

“However, it is still difficult for the Son of Man to escape from demons. The demons nearly had complete control over Brother Johann’s body.”

“And then what happened?”

“…Fortunately, before things escalated further, the exorcist team dispatched by the Papal States arrived at the Academy.”

Though Head Priest Giovanni performed the miracle of enduring for a month, the power of the demons grew stronger day by day.

If things continued like this, it was only a matter of time before his body was completely taken over.

It was then that the priestly team from the Papal States arrived at the Academy.

“The exorcists intended to perform the exorcism immediately. They quickly completed their preparations, and all that remained was to carry out the exorcism.”

However, there was a problem.

It was already too late to exorcise the demons that had taken refuge in Head Priest Giovanni’s body.

“To separate Brother Johann’s soul was beyond his frail condition. Moreover, his strength was diminished due to the demons.”

The exorcists dispatched from the Papal States found themselves at a crossroads.

Should they gamble Head Priest Giovanni’s life to exorcise the demons?

Or should they seek another way?

The very reality of having to make such a choice was cruel, for while the exorcists sought another method, Head Priest Giovanni was continuously suffering.

Moreover, Head Priest Giovanni’s reputation was high even within the Holy Empire. It would be difficult to keep his possession a secret, and if he were to die…

“The Holy Empire will grieve greatly.”

“That’s right. Among the exorcists, there were those who were aided by Brother Johann, which made it even more so.”

And it was none other than Head Priest Giovanni who pushed the exorcists.

“He said this.”

– If my insignificant life can ensure your safety… isn’t it a path of salvation given by the Lord?

He asked them to perform the exorcism, saying he was okay.

“…The conclusion was only one.”

Under the solemn atmosphere, the exorcism ritual for Head Priest Giovanni was carried out.

And naturally, the exorcism ended up failing dramatically.

“The demons had clung to his soul too tenaciously. Ultimately, Brother Johann was completely consumed by the demons and tried to escape from where the exorcism was taking place.”

One of the exorcists, trying to stop him, used one of the holy relics he brought for the exorcism.

“The Sword of the Archangel Michael. That is the Sword of Punishment.”

“The Sword of Punishment…”

A legendary artifact said to be used by the great archangel Michael. It was astonishing that it existed, and even more so that they had procured such a precious relic.

They were sincere in saving Head Priest Giovanni. I could even feel their desperation.

However, suddenly a question arose in my mind.

The Sword of Punishment is, as the name implies, a longsword-shaped holy relic. The fact that it was ‘used’ on Head Priest Giovanni, who was attempting to flee from the exorcism…

– That day, the students witnessed it. They saw Head Priest Giovanni, his eyes gouged out, with the longsword stuck in his chest, standing there covered in blood.

Suddenly, I remembered the ghost story Daniel had told me. It was said that a longsword was stuck in his chest.

“…No way.”

Priest Matthew nodded with a sad expression. My lips began to tremble uncontrollably.

“It was a sword plunged into Brother Johann’s heart.”

“Did it really have to be done that way?”

“Once he was completely consumed by the demons, there was practically no way to spare Brother Johann’s life.”

I was at a loss for words. I just stared blankly at Priest Matthew as he continued his story.

“Nevertheless, the demons struggled desperately to escape. Normally, since the possessed would perish, the demons remaining in that body should have also exited.”

Yet, the demons did not do so. What could be the reason?

“Brother Johann was still alive.”

He desperately clung to life, briefly pushing the demons away, and rushed with all his might into the Academy’s main chapel.

He understood what the demons wanted.

“What did they desire?”

“…Brother Johann was highly praised and was even showing signs of being canonized.”

“Yes. But that…”

“The demons wanted to prove something. They aimed to corrupt a virtuous soul that had strengthened its faith in the Lord, and by doing so, demonstrate that faith could be tainted at any time.”

I clenched my fists tightly. My nails dug painfully into my palms.

“Just for that reason…”

To corrupt a virtuous soul, to prove that even someone with strong faith could fall.

For wanting to drag a divinely chosen good person down to hell and leave the Lord frustrated.

Head Priest Giovanni had been sacrificed.

I bit my lips hard. I thought that the amount of anger I could show for others would be very limited, aside from matters related to Helena.

I was wrong. Right now, I was visibly angry.

Seeing me like that, Priest Matthew smiled bitterly.

“Brother Johann wanted to protect the Academy until the very end. Upon arriving at the chapel, he immediately turned that desperate wish into action.”

Upon arriving at the chapel, Head Priest Giovanni was already aware.

He had clearly accepted the demonic possession. This was a mortal sin regardless of the circumstances.

So, if things continued as such, he was destined to fall into hell because of the demons’ schemes.

What the demons desired was the fall of a virtuous soul lured by their temptations. The misalignment of faith, proven by that.

And the most virtuous faith that could be shown to others falling into corruption.

Head Priest Giovanni pondered briefly. And finally…

“The decision came quickly.”

He severed his own finger and gouged out his eye.

By offering them to the Lord, he inflicted a human sacrifice upon himself.

Self-harm and human sacrifice are considered to be acts of great sin, just like appealing to demons.

He chose to go to hell not because he fell to the demons, but due to his own sins.

“However, it was also an act that aligned with what the Lord desired.”

It was love. And sacrifice.

Head Priest Giovanni committed sins while performing the virtues that the Lord deemed proper.

“Having committed sins, he could not go to heaven. However, having acquired the virtues that the Lord treasures, he could no longer go to hell.”

“…Then, what about Head Priest Giovanni, who wandered the Academy?”

“He wandered aimlessly around the Academy. Trapped within himself, unable to do anything against the demons present in his body.”

He became the prison of the demons even after his death.

The demons, trapped within the remains of Head Priest Giovanni, began to wander the Academy in search of the fingers he had severed.

“They sought to find the finger and erase any evidence of the human sacrifice that Head Priest Giovanni had undertaken.”

“And to escape from that body…”

“And to drag the soul of Head Priest Giovanni, who remained on earth and could do nothing, into hell.”

They recovered the poorly gouged eye but failed to find the fingers.

“The exorcists hid them. However, if the fingers were to leave the chapel, the demons could track them, so they hid them inside the chapel.”

“The reason the demons wandered the annex was…”

“They believed that since they had found the gouged eye hidden in the annex, the fingers would surely be there as well.”

Priest Matthew closed his eyes. I quietly waited for him to continue.

“The Papal States also tried to solve this situation, but it was not easy to find Brother Johann, given the limited conditions of his appearance.”

“If they take the fingers…”

“The demons will follow them. If Brother Johann, who sacrificed himself for a greater cause, were to wander the streets in that hideous state to follow the fingers, people would likely point fingers at him.”

In the end, Head Priest Giovanni’s remains became trapped in the Academy along with the fingers.

Forgotten in the memories of people, for a very long time.

“The Sword of Punishment also safely returned to the hands of the exorcists. We must not forget Brother Johann’s sacrifice.”

“…What does it all amount to?”

My voice trembled. I cleared my throat and steadied my voice.

“What good does it do, after all?”

I was surprised at how hostile my tone was. Priest Matthew fell silent at my questioning.

“If others were in danger, the exorcists would have somehow managed it. Perhaps no one would have had to die.”

“…Brother Benedict.”

“Are those who regard sacrifice as a virtue all like this? Do they give their blood, their flesh, and ultimately their lives to others… so naturally, as if it is breathing?”

I couldn’t comprehend sacrificing for others. My subconscious was deeply resenting those who could do such things.

Why don’t those who have no hesitation in sacrificing for others ever think about the pain of those left behind?

This was not a question of whether they were selfish or not. In a sense, it was like throwing a stone at myself, who lacked the courage to stand up.

Sadness surged like a tidal wave. I bit my trembling lips harder.

The noble spirit of sacrifice that throws away not even one’s own life for the happiness of others.

Suddenly, I could not help but think of someone.

I could see the gaze of Priest Matthew fixed on me. His eyes looking at me in anger seemed to hold something ambiguous, even sympathy.

I trembled and rummaged through my pocket. I found a cigarette box with little left inside.

“…Excuse me, but may I smoke one?”

“Yes, that’s fine.”

My chest felt constricted. I wanted to alleviate this suffocation in any way.

The fleeting stick burned away. I forced myself to focus on the taste of the cigarette.

Yet, I could not do so. It felt as if my tongue had gone numb. I could not even taste the mint I usually enjoyed.

I felt as if I was meaningless, sitting there with a cigarette between my lips. Ultimately, I irritably flicked away the cigarette that hadn’t even burnt halfway.

“The world is truly exhausting.”

Priest Matthew muttered. It was not a statement meant for someone else to hear. It was close to a solitary lament.

“Nothing goes as one wishes, and what one hopes for so desperately always returns as failure. Why has the Lord given me such trials? Why am I always being tested? In life, such resentful thoughts often arise.”

“….”

“However, isn’t that just life?”

Life. It springs from the most radiant grace given by the Lord, the free will of humanity, and is like a mischievous thing that can bounce anywhere.

I clenched my fist tightly. The cigarette box in my hand crumpled and lost its shape.

“Life… you say.”

“Brother Benedict. We should never dare to try to understand their noble spirit of sacrifice.”

“Then what should we do?”

“We must accept it. That, too, is a different form of life that they chose.”

A different form of life. I quietly pondered that phrase.

Suddenly, I looked up at the sky.

The sun was setting. The sky was being dyed in a brilliant light.

I stared blankly at that sight.

“…Life.”

I murmured.

Suddenly, my face twisted awkwardly.

“Priest Matthew.”

“Yes, Brother Benedict.”

“It’s quite late. Do you have a place to sleep?”

“I’m used to sleeping outdoors for a day or two.”

“Please head to the staff dormitory. If you walk straight from the entrance of the chapel, you will find it. Tell the dormitory head that I have asked them to give you a spare room… They will offer you a room.”

Priest Matthew bowed his head in gratitude. I made an effort to look away.

“Will you not accompany me?”

“…I’m sorry. Normally, I would guide you, but…”

“No. I can ask passing people for directions.”

With a kind smile, Priest Matthew stood up from the bench.

His back grew distant. I stared blankly at him before turning my gaze away.

The sunset was painting the sky. It was burning intensely. As if it were yelling that now was the moment of the fiercest flames.

I watched it silently for a long time.

Is my face turning red just because of the sunset?

Or is it something else entirely?

“…Life.”

No matter how much I thought about it, I was an unworthy human being.