Chapter 173

“Damn it…”

Back at the Clan House, all sorts of thoughts flooded my mind the next day.

The shame of having my true nature exposed to Ha Yu-ri.

And the self-loathing for feeling such desire toward her.

These two emotions made it impossible for me to lift my head.

“Crazy bastard, what the hell was I thinking…”

To make matters worse, it wasn’t even a normal situation. It was right after Ha Yu-ri had reunited with her sibling.

“Enough. Thinking about this will only give me a headache.”

I had things to handle and people to care for, so now wasn’t the time for this.

“Yoo Ju.”

As the reputation of Eternity and Yoo Ju herself grew, she seemed to be quite busy lately.

Various clans had been inviting her, and as a Clan Master, she was meeting with leaders of large clans, living a hectic life.

There were also ongoing discussions about the rewards for pioneering the Swamp of Oblivion.

“I haven’t had many chances to talk to Yoo Ju.”

From Yoo Ju’s perspective, it seemed she was frustrated about not being able to spend time together.

Anyway, the reason I was worrying about Yoo Ju was, of course, because of our relationship.

“It’s about time I clarify things with Yoo Ju.”

From Yoo Ju’s side, it seemed like she was reaching her limit.

Regardless of how burdened I felt, I couldn’t keep avoiding her feelings forever.

I slowly made my way to Yoo Ju’s office.

“Ah… Lee Yun-seong.”

On the way to Yoo Ju’s office, I ran into Wi Ho-yeon.

Judging by her appearance, she seemed to have just finished training. Her hair was soaked with sweat.

“…Are you heading to the Master’s office?”

It seemed she had figured out I was going to see Yoo Ju.

“…Yes.”

“……”

She seemed to know why I was going to meet her.

Of course, she didn’t know the truth between me and Yoo Ju, but she seemed to sense that I was trying to clarify my feelings.

“…It’ll work out.”

“…Thank you, Ho-yeon.”

After greeting Wi Ho-yeon, I arrived at Yoo Ju’s office.

Normally, I would’ve opened the door and walked in without hesitation.

But this time, the door to the office felt like a massive wall.

“Sigh…”

…I knocked and entered.

“Ah… Yoon Seong?”

Yoo Ju’s eyes widened when she saw me.

She hadn’t expected me to be the one knocking.

Her surprise was brief, and she quickly smiled and spoke to me.

“Yoon Seong, what brings you here?”

“……”

“Uh… Yoon Seong?”

Seeing me hesitate, Yoo Ju looked puzzled.

“Ah, well…”

I had planned to come clean here, but the words just wouldn’t come out.

“…Yoo Ju, are you free this evening?”

In the end, all I could do was postpone the conversation.

At my question, Yoo Ju’s face lit up like a blooming flower.

“Ah, yes! Of course. Is there something…?”

“…How about we go out for a drink? There’s something important I need to talk to you about…”

Yoo Ju excitedly responded to my suggestion.

“Yes! I’d love to!”

“…Are you sure you’re free? You’ve been quite busy lately…”

“Ah, no! I can make time. I have a meeting with another Clan Master, but I can cancel it!”

“Wait… You don’t have to go that far…”

Yoo Ju’s sparkling eyes made me feel even more flustered.

From her perspective, she seemed to be expecting something big, but from my side, I was just feeling anxious about the shocking truth I had to reveal.

“You don’t have to cancel your meeting…”

“It’s fine! They’ve been bothering me lately anyway, so this works out!”

“…Looks like they’ve been really annoying Yoo Ju.”

It seemed the other party had been pestering her.

“So you absolutely can’t take back what you just said, okay? We’re having drinks tonight.”

“…Haha, alright.”

…In the end, I couldn’t say anything here.

******

‘Time’s up…’

Finally, the time for my meeting with Yoo Ju arrived.

‘Damn it, did I just make a mistake…’

Regret washed over me, but this was something I had to resolve eventually.

I dressed appropriately and left the office. I didn’t want to face Yoo Ju looking sloppy, especially since she seemed so excited.

Yoo Ju was already waiting at the main gate of the Clan House.

She spotted me and approached.

“Yoon Seong.”

“Sorry. I think I kept you waiting.”

“No, it’s fine. Hehe, I just got here too.”

Yoo Ju blushed as she spoke. Probably because of my unusually different attitude and outfit.

Well, to be fair, Yoo Ju had also dressed up.

“Y-Yoon Seong. You seem a bit different today. Hmm, hmm…”

“Haha…”

Swoosh –

Yoo Ju cautiously linked her arm with mine. As she did, she glanced at my face, seemingly gauging my reaction.

There was a slight fear that I might reject her touch.

‘……’

Of course, I had no intention of rejecting her.

I wanted Yoo Ju to be in a good mood, at least for now.

“…I’ve got a place in mind, so I’ll lead the way, Yoo Ju.”

Seeing that I didn’t reject her touch, Yoo Ju naturally broke into a wide smile.

“Yes!”

And so, with Yoo Ju holding my arm, we walked for a while.

I couldn’t just tell her what I needed to say in a public place.

It had to be somewhere private.

“Ah…”

Yoo Ju seemed to be imagining something strange.

Well, it was understandable, since I’d taken her to a bar where you could rent private rooms.

The male staff member widened his eyes when he saw us.

“…I made a reservation earlier today.”

“Ah… Yes. Your name…?”

“The reservation should be under Lee Yun-seong.”

“Yes, thank you for waiting a moment.”

The male employee kept glancing at Yoo Ju while speaking, his gaze uncontrollable despite the usual skill in handling such situations.

“Yes, your reservation is confirmed. You can proceed to Room 8.”

“Yes, thank you.”

After arriving at the room, Yoo Ju and I took our seats.

“Ah, um… Yoon Seong…”

Yoo Ju seemed unusually nervous, perhaps because I had suddenly asked her out on a date and didn’t refuse any physical contact, which must have made her overthink.

“Yes, Yoo Ju.”

“So… what’s the reason you asked me out alone today?”

“…I have something to confess to you.”

“C-confess?”

Yoo Ju gulped at my response.

“…Yes. It’s a serious topic, so I thought it would be better to do it this way.”

“Ah… um, okay… I’m fine—no, I’m happy!”

I sighed inwardly at her reaction.

‘…What do I do now?’

What I was about to tell her would be like a bolt from the blue for her.

Seeing Yoo Ju so happy made me feel like I was going to lose my mind.

“First, let’s order some food.”

I couldn’t muster the courage to speak without alcohol.

After the food and drinks arrived, Yoo Ju, with her flushed face and fidgeting hands, finally spoke.

“Um… Yoon Seong. I was really surprised today. When you suddenly asked if I was free tonight…”

“…I thought about waiting since you’ve been so busy lately, but I felt it was better to tell you as soon as possible.”

“Ah… so, the confession… is that what you’re talking about…?”

“…Yes.”

Not just her face, but her entire body seemed to turn slightly red.

Her breathing seemed to quicken, perhaps due to her emotions.

She kept drinking more than usual. I needed to be drunk for this.

“Y-Yoon Seong. You’re drinking too fast…”

“It’s fine. Honestly… I don’t think I can say it sober.”

“Ah… right. Confessions are hard to do sober!”

‘…It’s not the kind of confession you’re thinking of.’

“But! Don’t feel too pressured! My answer is already decided. I’m just so moved that you’d do this for me…”

Now she was on the verge of tears.

‘Please don’t do this.’

The more Yoo Ju acted like this, the more my burden grew.

“I kept thinking… maybe I’m not attractive to you… maybe I’m not your type, or maybe I’m ugly…”

‘No, why would you think you’re ugly? That’s insane.’

Anyone else hearing her would have been speechless.

“I’ve been trying to express my feelings to you, and even though I’ve been increasing physical contact, you barely reacted…”

‘…..’

I roughly understood what she was saying. Hearing her out, it made sense that she’d have such worries.

…Except for the part about her looks.

I had known for a while that Yoo Ju had feelings for me, and I had been avoiding her, which must have driven her crazy.

Honestly, most women would have lost interest if a man acted like I did.

‘Normally, feelings would just fade away.’

But Yoo Ju couldn’t let go of me because of the memories of our first meeting.

‘…Memories I fabricated.’

Memories I had manipulated and artificially created.

I kept worrying. I didn’t know how to broach the subject.

Words can change everything, and I genuinely hoped Yoo Ju wouldn’t be too shocked.

Like Ha Yu-ri said, it wasn’t just me pretending to be a good person—I had done something to Yoo Ju, so it was only natural.

But fear crept in.

How would Yoo Ju look at me after hearing what I had to say?

Selfishly, I didn’t plan to tell her everything.

But even if I only told her half the truth, it would still be a huge shock for her.

‘…And even after telling her, there’s still a problem. We’re in the same clan, after all.’

In the worst-case scenario, I might even have to leave Eternity.

‘And that’s assuming Yoo Ju doesn’t try to kill me.’

Frankly, there was no guarantee she wouldn’t stab me with a spear after hearing me out.

“Yoon Seong, are you okay?”

“Ah…”

My serious expression must have worried Yoo Ju.

“Did you drink too fast? Your face…”

“…No. It’s not the alcohol. It’s just hard to tell the truth.”

“…Huh? The truth?”

Yoo Ju looked puzzled at the sudden mention of the truth.

“…I’m sorry, Yoo Ju. I apologize in advance. You don’t have to forgive me.”

“What are you…”

As the conversation took an odd turn, Yoo Ju’s expression changed.

“Yoo Ju.”

“…Yes?”

“…I know you’re a Returner.”