Chapter 78

Three days had passed since the first day. So it was the fourth day.

Life at Ham Yejin’s house flowed smoothly without any particular turbulence. In fact, there was little to happen, as Ham Yejin always left for work early in the morning and returned late at night. Except for the nights, I was always alone.

Ham Yejin kept apologizing for that, but I told her not to worry about it.

During the daytime, when I was alone, I wrote and watched YouTube. After three days, nothing had particularly changed.

After returning on the first day, Ham Yejin showed me around the house and indicated that I could use her room, specifically her computer.

I wondered if it was appropriate to use it, given her job, but she assured me that nothing problematic was kept in the house.

So, I decided not to refuse and used Ham Yejin’s room.

In fact, once she had given me the Wi-Fi password, there was nothing I couldn’t do with my laptop. Since I had borrowed it from Hwa-won, its performance was not bad.

Staying in a personal room that would be filled with a woman’s private life made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

After all, showing a personal computer to someone else was somewhat burdensome.

Still, the reason I accepted Ham Yejin’s offer was unexpectedly trivial.

Her house was spacious, but it didn’t feel overcrowded; it felt somewhat empty, and for some reason, that wide, empty sensation was unsettling. I felt a desire to be in somewhere more suitable, perhaps smaller.

Despite the house having five rooms, the only proper ones were Ham Yejin’s personal room and the bedroom. One room was completely empty, while another was filled with just clothes. One room was cluttered with various boxes and miscellaneous items.

“I bought it on home shopping. I have a habit of impulse buying…”

It felt like I was seeing an unexpected side of the seemingly perfect Ham Yejin.

In any case, the only room that truly smelled of life was Ham Yejin’s room. I accepted her offer simply because I wanted to be in that room. It was an ungrateful thing to say, but it might also be a testament to how unsettled my mind was.

And being in the room naturally led me to use Ham Yejin’s computer.

While I certainly didn’t rummage through her computer without reason, there were things that naturally caught my eye.

As I had mentioned before, it seemed that Ham Yejin had used L.O. and had it installed. It was natural that there were bookmarks for YouTube, but surprisingly there were also internet broadcasting sites and various indie game sites.

As for work-related items, as mentioned before, not a single one was in sight.

Looking back, I realized that I didn’t really know much about Ham Yejin.

It was of course to be expected since we hadn’t known each other long, yet being in her house felt strange.

Ham Yejin came from a wealthy background, and she said her uncle gifted her a car. It seemed she was good at gaming, having achieved L.O. master status. She worked for the National Intelligence Service and had previously handled two individuals who, like me, had fallen ill; unfortunately, she lost both.

She seemed sharp, yet had a habit of impulse buying on home shopping, and even though she was wealthy, she had a simple side that liked mix coffee. She had quite a strong personality, and she also had a hobby of collecting dolls, and her favorite food was…

I realized I didn’t even know her favorite food.

Even when I tried to think about it, the depth of our relationship was so shallow that there was nothing to recall. With Hwa-won, for example, I had spent so long together that I could easily remember his likes and dislikes.

Still, there was one thing I was sure of.

Ham Yejin was a woman.

She was a woman, yet in some ways, she didn’t seem like one.

Out of all the women I had seen, Ham Yejin was the only one who seemed not to embody the feminine essence.

At least more so than my mother.

…That was a pointless thought. I shouldn’t try to ponder over such things.

I sat in a chair and looked around Ham Yejin’s room. There was a small bed that was different from the one in the bedroom, a dresser, and a clothing rack casually set aside. One wall was entirely covered with bookshelves.

On the shelves, I saw many law and science books which would hold no interest for me. At least most of them were not novels.

Literary works like novels were all crammed into one section, the majority being poetry collections and fairy tales. They didn’t seem to be the kind meant for children. There were few novels—only several short story collections by Korean authors.

Among those, there were only three novels I recognized.

…‘The Boy’s Womb’ and the two short story collections I had published earlier.

I felt somewhat unfamiliar with the situation.

I got up from the chair and lay down on the small bed. I buried my face in the pillow.

…Thinking back, there was no need for me to sleep in Ham Yejin’s bedroom. When I found out there was a small bed in this room, I had said that we didn’t have to share the same room while sleeping, but Ham Yejin had not accepted that.

She had said not to worry about my discomfort with sleeping on the sofa. Even when I mentioned that I would rather sleep on the sofa, she said that was unacceptable.

In the end, I still slept in Ham Yejin’s bedroom, while she slept on the sofa beside me.

There were also plush toys on the small bed in this room. They were much smaller than the ones in the bedroom and could serve as pillow substitutes.

Ji Kang-hyeon had also mentioned collecting whale or shark stuffed animals. A documentary about orcas from a few days ago passed through my mind, but I quickly shoved it aside. Most of Ham Yejin’s stuffed animals were popular ones like rabbits and bears. There were no whales or sharks.

Usually, liking such stuffed animals would be seen as more of a feminine trait. While some men do like stuffed animals, it is generally more common among women.

Seeing such feminine traits in Ham Yejin made me feel a bit of a headache.

I got up again and sat in the chair. I always had plenty of time. However, there had never been a time like now when I had so much free time.

I felt an obsessive need to consume time. If I did nothing, it would simply be agonizing. At least when I was alone, that was the case.

So, I kept wasting time on the computer. I read articles filled with useless trivia and watched videos of things being shredded in a shredder. Time slipped away like that.

~

I turned on my smartphone at the sound of a vibration. It was a message from Ham Yejin. She said she would be a bit late today and apologized, asking me to eat dinner first.

After finishing work on the first day, Ham Yejin had brought home a lot of things. Groceries, ramen, and a large amount of meal kits.

“I’m sorry. I don’t usually eat at home… so I just bought some things on a whim.”

“It’s okay.”

“…Just in case, I bought some food ingredients. Do you know how to cook?”

“No.”

“Is that so?”

Ham Yejin seemed a bit flustered. I didn’t know it at the time, but it turns out Ham Yejin had hardly ever cooked either.

That day, I filled my dinner with the meal kits Ham Yejin had brought and leftover lunch. Starting the next day, Ham Yejin always bought something for dinner on her way home. She brought takeout from nearby restaurants. The menu varied day by day.

In the mornings, I casually filled up on bread or something, and for lunch, when I was alone, I ate meal kits. When Ham Yejin came home from work, we would eat the food we had brought together.

Ham Yejin was always with me after work. We didn’t engage in too many conversations. There was light chatter, but there was never any talk of the past.

Ham Yejin just stayed beside me. We mostly watched TV together. Surprisingly, she liked to watch variety shows like a regular person.

They weren’t particularly my favorite shows, but Ham Yejin smiled.

Somehow, that boring variety show felt somewhat more interesting.

Those were the days.

Eating dinner alone was the first time since coming to this house.

Though I had the meal kit, I wasn’t feeling it, so I boiled some ramen instead. After casually finishing, I turned on the TV as usual. I switched on a variety show that was utterly uninteresting and stared blankly at the screen.

Eventually, I changed the channel.

The channel I switched to was broadcasting the news.

As soon as I saw the news, I jolted in surprise. Every hair on my body stood on end.

The photo on the news was of Lee Cheon.

Why?

Could it be that something related to me had leaked? Cold sweat began to trickle down my back. Ham Yejin had clearly said she wouldn’t disclose my story, but there was no preventing Lee Cheon’s side from spreading it.

However, fortunately, the news was not about me.

…A video of a woman in her thirties was playing in the background.

Her way of speaking had a slightly awkward tone. However, her words were steady.

Her expression seemed a bit anxious, but something in her face showed a strong determination.

She said something.

She opened her mouth, not me.

“I am the daughter of writer Lee Cheon.”

And then

“I have been sexually assaulted by my father for several years.”

She relayed the words I could not say.