Chapter 110

Dozens of pupils shiver. A pleasant thrill and tension run through my entire body.

Those gods, frozen stiff at just a few words from me. The utmost noble and great ones being manipulated by me, a mere demon.

Could there be a situation more enjoyable than this? Likely no demon in this world leads a life as delightful as mine.

“Hmm… is nobody going to come out? My, what a dilemma. My dear gods, I didn’t know you were such cowards.”

Even the mighty Thor god of thunder can’t bring himself to step forward under the heavy pressure of eternal annihilation. This flow feels good.

A sense of superiority and excitement floods my brain. It’s like I’ve taken some kind of stimulant – adrenaline surging like crazy.

“Well, it’s fine with me. Actually, I prefer it this way. No need for any nasty bloodshed between us, right?”

“Between us? When have we ever even met?”

“You gave me unforgettable memories. Memories you’ve all conveniently forgotten.”

It’s true – the one who hits forgets, but the one who gets hit remembers forever. My head still hurts across time and space from those blows, yet you all have been living so peacefully.

“You’re not in your right mind.”

“I hear that often. Funny thing is, I’m the most sane one here.”

“…Abnormal people don’t realize they’re abnormal, right?”

“That’s what an abnormal world says. Fact is, this world doesn’t realize how abnormal it truly is.”

Odin’s lone eye takes on a mysterious depth. I smile knowingly – a showy smile. But I’m not tense at all.

Among the gods, murmurs are dying down, but not a single one dares to speak up about killing me. Because the moment someone does, they’d have to take the front line. None of them are ready to face annihilation.

The best strategy in a game of hot potato is to throw it far away. But who among these suffocating games of wits will take on that brave role?

“No takers? Really? Not a single soul? Ah! For the sake of the gods, I’ll throw myself in and sacrifice myself! Though of course, it’s impossible for just one hero to stand alone against me!”

…

I’ve given the gods permission to respond, but they stubbornly maintain their silence.

Guess I’ll have to step up then. After all, veteran clowns can play multiple roles.

“Hmm… shall I offer you a compromise, my esteemed lords?”

I clap my hands together. A crisp CLAP echoes.

“I know what you’re worried about. You fear I might cause some unpredictable accidents – me, the impurity or dangerous element.”

“…”

“I understand why you want to get rid of me immediately, but aren’t you considering my position at all? I’m alive too, a dynamic being endlessly pursuing life. There’s no way I’d willingly die just because of your excessive worries.”

While melodramatically lamenting my plight, I express my stance. Zeus remains expressionless and asks, “So, what compromise do you propose?”

“My goodness, so impatient. Anyway, among the things I plan to do, you’re naturally most concerned about divine creation, right?”

“Indeed. How could we possibly allow a mortal like you to subjectively create gods…?”

“Cut the crap. Noble species? If the female noble species scatters seeds everywhere regardless of race, would you call that noble? Even now, whenever women cheat and get pregnant, they blame ‘Lord Zeus visited me.’ Whose fault is that anyway?”

“Provocation?”

“Just stating facts, and now you’re calling it defamation of character and blasphemy? Though that’s your call, Zeus. Let’s lay our cards on the table.”

I pull out a magic stick. The thin tip points at Meta.

“How many of you honestly believe you could defeat Meta one-on-one?”

“…!”

“Meta is the sole god. The sole god of goblins. While you guys divide the faith of countless humans, Meta will soon monopolize the faith of all goblins. Though humans are far superior to goblins in terms of spiritual power, the sheer numbers make up for it.”

“Monster…”

“At this very moment, Meta is getting stronger in real-time. You can see it from the divine aura surrounding Meta’s body. What about you guys? Rather than getting stronger, aren’t you barely maintaining your divinity with ant-sized bits of faith?”

Back in the day when Satan tempted Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit…

They say Satan transformed into a snake to do the tempting.

Well, ancient people had vivid imaginations.

How did they know snakes have such persuasive tongues?

Anyway…

“Soon Meta will become a god with divine rank rivaling the supreme deities. You may use humans to oppress and massacre goblins, but goblins have always been treated this way. Frequently slaughtered by extermination squads, treated like street dogs even by other monsters… That’s the charm of being both crude and tenacious.”

“Get to the point already.”

“Simple. I won’t create any more gods. I’ve done enough deceiving you guys. No lowly creatures lower than goblins seem to be appearing either. My original goal wasn’t anything grand like ‘world domination’ or ‘leading the gods’ anyway. I’m just doing fun pranks.”

“Pranks?”

“Cats stare blankly at ticking pocket watches, dogs lose their minds over flying bones. Everyone has something that makes them lose focus, right? Just like how Zeus loses control and charges at females.”

“…! You insolent brat keeps spouting off since your mouth got loose. I’ve torn apart mouths like yours countless times.”

“Oh really? Then go ahead and try. I’m curious how fast your apostles would fall if all the goblins in the world only targeted them. Maybe it would help resolve the grudges of all the women you’ve violated.”

Zeus’s face turns red then pale. I didn’t intend to provoke him specifically, but when given the chance, one must seize it. I have this habit of exposing others’ dirty laundry.

“Oscar Lucifer, do you think it’s proper to insult the chief of the Olympian pantheon while making a proposal?”

Instead of Zeus, Odin steps forward, looking somewhat pleased despite his feigned anger.

“Of course, the best option is not giving anyone a reason to insult you, hehe…”

You felt the same way, didn’t you?

But I have no intention of teaming up with you, Odin.

“Do you have the right to talk, Odin?”

“What?”

“When you were learning seiðr… didn’t you dress up as a woman? And even enjoyed the pleasure known as female orgasm? Your back bending like a bow, your whole body twisting… I’d love to witness it sometime!”

“…”

Living so long must give gods a lot of skeletons in their closets.

Ah, right. Now’s not the time for this. Almost forgot my main purpose.

“Anyway, here’s my proposal. I won’t create any more gods. I’ve done everything I wanted to do. So letting me live won’t harm any of you!”

I declare this in the most trustworthy voice possible, like a con artist selling goods.

“How can we trust you?”

“I’ve thought about that too. How to gain the trust of such picky individuals! Should I cut off a hand as collateral? But then an idea came to me – an unbreakable oath.”

“What kind of oath?”

“Hmm… let me think…”

What was it again?

Since I rarely do serious thinking anymore, my brain is still fuzzy. The idea I prepared before praying isn’t coming to mind.

Oh, right!

“Have you heard of the Oath of the River Styx?”

The Oath of the River Styx.

An absolutely pure vow that cannot be broken even if the world splits in two.

Whoever swears by this literally cannot break the oath, even if the heavens split open. Breaking it means falling into a vegetative state forever, neither alive nor dead.

Though I don’t believe in Olympian mythology, the Oath of the River Styx is real. In the past, I’d sometimes force targets to make this oath then create situations where they had to break it.

“Are you saying you’ll swear by the River Styx?”

“Why not? I have nothing to hide. Let’s do it now. I, Oscar Lucifer, swear that under no circumstances will I create any gods. This is my oath by the River Styx. Satisfied?”

“…Once the River Styx is invoked, there’s no room for further argument.”

Despite its absurd simplicity, this is the most certain vow in existence. The gods seem to relax, some sighing while others scratch their heads at how easily things resolved.

Especially Thor, who was preparing to strike me from behind, grinds his teeth in frustration. Jeez, how is he still so hotheaded after all these years?

“However, you should not let your guard down, Oscar Lucifer.”

After reaching this settlement, I was about to leave with a semi-forced farewell when Odin called me back. His incomprehensible elderly voice pierces my ear.

“Why are you stopping me again?”

“Not exactly, but this incident has made you a target of divine vigilance. Who knows when a blind blade might pierce your heart? Right now, as you said, no one here can act rashly, but…”

“Your honorifics changed. From ‘you’ to ‘you sir’… and now advice? Did I suddenly become more likable to you? Strange, I only remember offending you.”

The gods are muttering as they return to heaven. Odin, the chief deity of Asgard, leaves cryptic words while hobbling away with his aged legs.

With a faint smile on his lips.

“Just a token of gratitude for reminding me of old memories. Seeing you reminded me of a deceased brother.”

“…Is that so? Didn’t mean to, but glad to hear I accumulated merit. Accumulating merit is my favorite thing to do.”

After this brief exchange, all the gods depart, leaving only Meta, the goblin god I created.

Now everything is done.

It’s time to head to Eden Academy as I’ve been waiting for.

“Meta, come here.”

I call my creation. Meta comes running with his towering physique.

“Yes, yes! Speak your command!”

“I’ll tell you what you need to do now. Listen carefully and follow instructions exactly. Understand?”

“Of course! For Master Oscar, I’d jump into flames!”

“You wouldn’t die from flames anyway now.”

“Ah…! Right…! Then another example…”

“No, never mind. Just do what I say properly.”

I whisper into…

I explain his tasks into Meta’s large green ears. His eyes widen in shock but soon nod firmly in determination.

“Alright, I’ll leave it to you. Aru! Let’s go!”

“Bark bark! Where to?”

“To the continent!”

My five hundred years in Demon Forest are finally coming to an end.

I exit the forest accompanied by one pet dog.

Not long after, I visit a weapon shop on the continent and purchase a shotgun and air rifle. Though with my current abilities I could shatter heads with telekinesis against most strong opponents, nothing compares to the satisfaction of using firearms.

Ah, this is what I missed. The rich smell of gunpowder, the crimson blood flowing… These beautiful gun barrels. Already looking forward to academy life.

Eden Academy.

And our Saintess Maria.

Look forward to it, everyone. The clown’s here.

***

God Odin’s heart was filled with melancholy.

Thor, observing this carefully, asked nonchalantly.

“What’s wrong since earlier? Did that Oscar guy remind you of something?”

Odin moistened his dry lips and spoke.

“Thor, didn’t that Oscar remind you of someone?”

“Huh? Remind me? What nonsense is that? How could we recognize someone so baby-smelling?”

“I felt it. No… seeing that guy reminded me of someone who died long ago. How strange. Two people with no possible connection…”

“How am I supposed to know who you’re talking about without mind-reading powers?”

“Loki. That trickster.”

“Loki? He died ages ago.”

“Yeah, he’s definitely dead… Yet seeing young Oscar the demon reminded me of Loki.”

‘That cats staring at ticking pocket watches and dogs losing it over flying bones… Wasn’t that something Loki used to say?’

As Odin’s lone eye deepened,

“Hey! Stop daydreaming again!”

CLAP!

Thor, avoiding deep thoughts, slapped Odin’s back. Not hard enough to provoke anger.

“Loki’s been dead for ages! Why bother with such useless thoughts!”

‘Hmm… With countless beings in existence, maybe one could resemble Loki in nature… It’s been so long since Loki died, why am I having these delusions…’

Odin quickly forgot whatever had briefly crossed his mind. Now was the time to focus on the rapidly changing divine realm due to the birth of the Goblin God.

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