Chapter 74

It’s way too easy to take on an assistant like this. Sure, it’s convenient to have someone around to do the work for me, but I can’t just let myself get complacent about it.

Relationships that are formed easily tend to break apart just as easily. It wasn’t for nothing that I went through so much trouble to recruit Aru and Beatrix. I personally risked my life walking a tightrope to win their trust, and that’s why they’ve stuck by me for a hundred, two hundred years.

But Langwang… Considering his personality, once he becomes my ally, it’s unlikely he’d betray me. However, if he ever feels like leaving, he might just disappear without a word. After all, our bond was formed with just a few words.

And yet, trying to put on some kind of show here seems… impossible. Shows require digging up someone’s desires, but Langwang is fully aware of his own desires.

Saintess Irolwel, that unattainable love. She never accepted his advances when she was alive, making their union impossible, and now that she’s dead, even pursuing her is out of the question.

I may be able to fly and live long, but even I can’t bring back the dead.

The wild is a place where life and death intertwine. As a product of the wild, Langwang knows better than anyone the unchanging truth of this cycle. That’s why, rather than denying reality, he chooses to mourn and remember Irolwel. Thanks to this acceptance, he remains a very sane barbarian in the present day.

“But I am not merely an assistant; I wish to be your comrade.”

“That’s what I said. Comrade is just another word for assistant.”

“Is that so? Then are you my assistant?”

“Nah, that doesn’t make sense. Yohan here is my assistant, so how could I be Yohan’s assistant?”

“Hmm? Something feels off here?”

“Don’t worry about it. The world itself is strange. The quicker you adapt to its strangeness, the closer you get to becoming a civilized person. Don’t you want to be one, Yohan? Like Irolwel?”

“…”

But I’m a hybrid who turns impossibilities into realities. Even if I can’t resurrect the dead, I can still reignite the spark of desire.

Langwang’s eyes widen. The barbarian reacting instinctively to the word “Irolwel.”

“I wonder…”

“Heheh.”

“Irolwel was unique. No beast in this forest could think like Irolwel did.”

“That’s because Irolwel was a product of civilization. Aren’t you curious? What exactly is this ‘civilization’ that created someone like Irolwel?”

In the beginning, there was nothing. A world without good or evil. It was only natural not to differentiate between them. Sacrificing another’s child to save your own was basic survival.

But then civilization arose, ethics were created among those who had power, and doctrines and laws were established to spread these ethics universally. That’s when actions were defined as good or evil. Those who killed another’s child to save their own faced rightful criticism.

Saintess Irolwel, my Lord Maria…

They’re both products of civilization.

And now, within our group…

There’s also a sage created by the Holy Order, a product of civilization.

“Sir Beatrix, would you come over here for a moment?”

Objectively speaking, she’s not really a sage but closer to a fallen sinner. But since good and evil are subjective concepts, she’s virtuous by my anti-civilization standards.

“My lord, you called?”

Here she comes, shaking her brown ponytail as she enters the hut. I grab her shoulder and pull her forward, like a salesman presenting a product.

“The Holy Order where Irolwel grew up! Isn’t that right, Sir Beatrix? You were born and raised there, weren’t you?”

“Ahem, that’s true… My lord, how could you put me through such a trial…”

“Even though you currently reside with me in the Demon Forest, you once held sway over the Holy Order! The entire Holy Nation trembled at your every word!”

“Oh! A great one! It’s an honor to meet you!”

“As someone from the Holy Nation, that’s mostly exaggerated… Ah…”

Beatrix gives up after trying to handle my extravagant introduction, letting out a sigh.

Heheh, you chose me as your lord. Stick with it through thick and thin.

“Excessive modesty isn’t good! You were the foremost Holy Knight of the Holy Nation, weren’t you?”

“That’s… It’s not modesty, but I truly wasn’t in such a high position…”

“Ohoo! The best of the Holy Nation! I don’t know what that means, but it sounds amazing! You remind me of Irolwel somehow!”

“That’s probably because you’ve only seen two human women… Ah, maybe it’s because we grew up in similar environments.”

With Langwang’s enthusiastic reactions adding to it, Beatrix eventually gives up resisting and humbly accepts. Good attitude.

“Amazing! Incredible! So you’re a civilized person!”

“Yes sir, that’s correct. I am a civilized person.”

“Civilized person! Irolwel! Civilized person! Irolwel!”

Bang, bang, bang!

The excited barbarian starts jumping around. He looks just like an orangutan. When I jump, it creates a breeze, but when this giant barbarian does a standing jump, the ground and the hut shake.

“Keee! There’s a monster… A monster…”

Aru, who has been scared of the barbarian before, trembles behind me. Clinging to me like a caterpillar. Is a wolf who hides behind its leader when seeing a monster really a true wolf?

“Uh, by the way, when you eventually step into civilized society, you might want to restrain your jumping. People might mistake you for an escaped gorilla from the zoo. Or should I say, King Kong?”

Swish, swish.

Casually offering advice to the thrilled Langwang while placing my hand on Aru’s forehead. Usually so prickly, but after tasting Langwang’s fingers once, Aru seems to have realized the value of my existence and quietly accepts my patting.

Kyaa, feels refreshing. Good look for you, arrogant wolf pup.

“…Ah! Now that I think about it, do I need to leave this place to become your companion?”

The leaping Langwang suddenly remembers something and asks.

“Well, obviously. We need to travel together to be comrades, right? Don’t you want to see the civilized world?”

“No, I do want to go. I will go. But if I have to leave here…”

“Then I’ll temporarily vacate the area.”

“Why? Is there something you need to prepare?”

At this question, Langwang turns around, smiling broadly as he speaks.

“I need to say goodbye to Irolwel.”

—

Meanwhile, the sun is setting. Watching the slowly fading red sun, I enjoy the cool wind blowing.

The sun has a line at its edge – a pale yellow one. A line that only the sun possesses, unlike stars or moons. That’s why I dislike the sun.

If we were to name the most impartial being, most people would choose the sun. Even the barbarian sitting next to me now is bathed in sunlight.

The sun is benevolent. It shines down without caring whether people appreciate its grace or not.

“Irolwel.”

Does this barbarian understand the grace of the sun?

Probably not.

“I’m curious about this ‘civilization’ where Irolwel grew up.”

That’s why they built Irolwel’s tomb in a sunny, well-lit spot, right?

With crooked handwriting, they even carved a gravestone.

“After Irolwel passed away, I felt lonely. I wasn’t happy. There was no one beside me.”

The cliff where I stand now overlooks an endless large river below. Once ruled by the Fish King Kraken, it’s the biggest river in the Demon Forest.

On top of the cliff stands a solitary gravestone, inscribed with “Irolwel.”

“Then one day, a person appeared. They came from the same place as Irolwel. They could speak. The same language as Irolwel.”

Langwang kneels before the gravestone, rubbing it with his thick fingers. Mutterings flow from his lips – whether they’re to himself or to a spirit, it’s unclear.

“I decided to follow them. Because Irolwel said so. She told me to be happy. And because I love Irolwel, I must listen to her words.”

Langwang stands up. His tanned skin and thick black hair contrast sharply against the brilliant sunlight.

Having finished his final farewell to Irolwel, Langwang sits at the edge of the cliff. I sit beside him quietly and start a conversation.

“You came here to pay respects to Irolwel’s grave?”

“Yes. Though her lower body disappeared, her upper body remained. So we buried her here.”

“Hmm, calling her ‘sister-in-law’ feels a bit off. Anyway, let me offer my respects too. Irolwel? This guy here, I’ll take good care of him.”

“…You’re quite positive. Always seem cheerful, with a smile on your face.”

“Hahaha, I tend to laugh a lot naturally.”

Did Irolwel see my greeting? Probably not.

Heh heh heh, the Irolwel who raised you so carefully, she’s mine now. Rest in peace and just watch my wicked smile.

“Laughter is good. It makes life joyful and prosperous. Irolwel taught me that.”

“She taught you well. Life is tough enough as it is, so we should laugh often to gain energy.”

“After Irolwel passed away, I couldn’t laugh for a while. But she was right. As time passed, laughter gradually returned.”

“Very impressive. Regaining the ability to laugh after losing someone precious isn’t easy.”

Langwang stretches his arms behind him, supporting the flat ground with his palms. Just two steps ahead lies a sheer vertical drop.

Below the vertical line, the water surface extends endlessly – another vertical line parallel to the ground we’re sitting on. Following that invisible end of the water surface, all we can see are the horizon and the sunset.

Whoosh!

The wind brushing past my cheeks feels refreshing. Uncharacteristically peaceful atmosphere for the Demon Forest. Behind us, Aru, Beatrix, and Uriel hide behind separate trees, watching Langwang. Neither Langwang nor I care much about their presence.

“Is it okay to leave Irolwel behind?”

“Leave behind? I don’t understand. Irolwel is dead.”

“I mean, Irolwel is buried here. Is it alright for you to leave her grave and follow us?”

“Irolwel said that the soul and body are separate.”

Clang.

Langwang rummages through his leather clothing and pulls something out.

What he reveals along with his words is a silver cross. The metal glints under the golden twilight sunlight.

“Irolwel’s body may be here in the ground, but…”

“But?”

“Her soul is in the cross.”

“Hooh.”

“I believe that. Since she gave it to me, there must be a reason.”

“So you believe Irolwel’s soul resides in that cross?”

“Yes. I always carry the cross with me. Thus, Irolwel is always by my side.”

Langwang’s words are filled with unwavering faith. He believes in Irolwel just as I believe in Maria. Perhaps they’ll become deities worshipped through faith someday.

Yohan. One of the twelve apostles who served the Messiah. Famous for being the only one who didn’t betray the Messiah when all the other apostles did. Because of this, he was the only one to live to a ripe old age.

There must be a reason why Irolwel named him Yohan. The king of humans who would be left alone for a long time after her passing, without anyone to support him. Loneliness invites all sorts of peculiar things.

Unchanging faith. While it should be expressed as love, I speculate that Irolwel named him ‘Yohan’ out of concern for the lonely king, hoping his love wouldn’t change.

Thinking about this brings a mischievous idea to mind – a somewhat wicked thought to disrupt Irolwel’s careful arrangements.

“Hey, Mr. Yohan.”

I call out to Langwang, who’s gazing at the sunset.

“Hmm?”

“It’s been twenty years already. They say ten years can change mountains and rivers, and it’s been enough time for them to change twice since Irolwel passed away. How about seeking new connections? I’m sure Irolwel would want that too. People need lovers to truly be happy. Loving a deceased person like Irolwel will only leave you lonely forever.”

I gently suggest.

Langwang turns his head.

A pair of eyes lock onto me.

“Irolwel always called me ‘Yohan’ or ‘young one.'”

“Really?”

“But one day, when I realized and felt ashamed of my own savagery, Irolwel called me something different for the first time.”

“What was it?”

“A man. Not a savage, but a man. She said tearing raw meat with bare hands and hunting beasts without tools makes me a man. Irolwel said so.”

After saying this, Langwang takes a deep breath. Then, grinning widely, he shouts towards the vast sky.

“Can death possibly part the love of a man-!”

“Can death possibly part the love of a man- Can death possibly part the love of a man- Can death possibly part the love of a man-” The echo of Langwang’s cry returns.

This is a vow. Langwang’s solemn vow of unchanging love to the deceased Irolwel. Leaving her grave behind, though his body may depart, his heart will never abandon Irolwel – a vow to himself.

“Keke.”

I burst out laughing, having abandoned the playful thought that momentarily crossed my mind.

Langwang’s love isn’t something that can be shattered by mere words. To put it simply, it’s like trying to corrupt Maria.

Anyway, these saintesses, Irolwel and Maria alike, are truly something else.

“Speaking of which, I’ll answer your suggestion.”

“Good, good. That was a really good response.”

“Praise is good. Irolwel said praise enriches people’s lives.”

Langwang looks at me again. His face wears a hearty smile, completely free of any darkness.

All jesters share one unspoken rule: you can give your love, but never your heart. If you lose your heart and stop laughing, you can’t make others laugh.

However, this man Langwang is smiling so brightly. Even though he’s lost his heart, he hasn’t lost his soul, which is why he can still laugh.

Could I do the same, having lost my heart to Maria?

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